Sitting in my so called new room while my mother is rummaging thru my things contemplating about everything that has happened within this past year; hence i'm back under the roof of parents (semi ~ that is!).
This past year so many things have occured and time just seemed to have flown by so quickly! It went from May to April so quick in like that it seems like it's just been week when it's been like months. During this time period I have acutally learned a lot of things that I wish I knew before hand so then maybe I wouldn't have had to wasted a year to learn it the hard way. Well, I shouldn't be complaining now since I've learned and became someone differnt, with a lot more knowledge!
When I left my house last year I was a lot differnt then I am now. Before I was the type of girl who didn't know the value of a dollar, life was perfect, and I just had it all my way. Now, I believe strongly that I am differnt. I've changed for the better, I'm not that stuck up princess anymore. I don't think that I'm a concided little girl. I am more open to different people. Now if you talk to me I wouldn't judge you on what your not, and accept you for who you are.
Things that are differnt and that I learned briefly would be...
...Life...
I learned the value of a dollar. After last September, it's not like I was given everything as easily as when I was living at home. Although all you people see me as a girl that just goes shopping, I do more than just shop and spend money. People think that it's given to me so easily, but you know although I may not go out there and work, I do have to sacrifcice a lot to get what I do. Materalistic things don't make me happy anymore, it's the things that count that matters most.
All year I envyed several differnt types of people. And that was those who have family to go home to , those who have parents yell at them, those who have a curfew, those who have brother's and sister's that they can relate to and help each other. I on the other hand may have a lot of sibilngs but none of this. You may think my life is perfect but more and more I realized that it wasn't. I learned that family is important and it was something that I really wished that I had, maybe that's why I decided to come back home before everyone starts leaving again to seperate places.
I've never had a chance to be a kid when I was a kid. I realized the impact that that has on my life. I think this past year was the chance that I got to go out and be bad. I got to do things that I wasn't allowed to do, experience differnt things like meet different people. Get hurt and eventually that just made me stronger. Learn how people are selfish, self centered, not caring, fake, and just a bunch of liars. (Especially SF people no offense). Without my mother protecting me, I felt everyone stepping on me, I wasn't powerful, but was able to pick myself up with the help of my friends.
... Friendship...
I learned the value of friendship. I know how to judge from good and bad; and all you fuckers that just want to utilize me. I know who will stay and who is just an aquaintance. Now I know who I can trust and who I can't. Being popular isn't as important to me anymore. Think of me, as what you want as long as I know who and what I am. My close friends now are what I value and am there for. Aquaintances can just kiss my a$$...=P
Lets go back and think about what I did this year...
May 2004
My birthday month...party and more party...*dUrH*
June 2004 ~ July 2004 ~ August 2004
I got my first on place on my own right in the heart of Mt.view (MIRAMONTE). It was small but cozy but just filled with all my shit, and of course a definite waste of money because I never stayed there. I was flying back and forth from Norcal to La to Vegas to San Diego. I think I was mainly in Socal just shopping, clubbing, meeting old friends, and partying.
September 2004
This is when the reality check all began. I met this guy over the summer. I thought I really started to change, and was hoping to go home to start my life back as planned but I didn't. This guy really made me happy, I felt as if I was normal, He was able to relate to me because of the way our family living style was, all we were ever feed was money. You readers may think that that's the lifestyle to live, but in actuality it really isn't. If you were ever in our shoes you may one day understand. Well, anyways he said that we shouldn't see each other anymore because at this time I decided that I didn't want to go back home and I started to work at one of the most degrading places a girl can work at which is a bar. But when I first started to work there it wasn't for the money or anything, it was because my play bro asked me for a favor for a month or til he finds someone new but it ended up me working there for about 2 months, and within the 2 months I lost the guy that I liked because he complained to me isn't giving me everything not enough, isn't having a normal life with going to school coming home, going shopping not what I wanted? Honestly at that I really didn't know what exactly I wanted, I was still confused. I think it's just that I ran away from what I thought was perfect because I was afraid; and I didn't want to get hurt. Anyways that was that, it was just to hard to believe.
October 2004 ~ November 2004 ~ December 2004
Between these months I learned how hard it was for me to manage work late at night and school. Also how people were in shock that I was working! I didn't think it was that hard. It was actually pretty fun! Then I met this other guy that just came into my life and I made him easily walk out. If you like a person you don't complain about how they are, and on tops you don't try to keep them away from their friends, and basically just take there life away, when life already felt like it was already gone. So that didn't last long. Well it wasn't going anywhere to start with...
Then at the end of the month my New Years Date that you all know of is the BIGGEST ASSHOLE....mUhAhA...~ giving unfortunate people a chance is one hell of a mistake that I made. All I do is make mistakes!!! WHY??? and meet bad people!!! WTF???>??? well ya...
Anyways, 2005 came along for me, and I met someone better and for keeps. He makes me happy and everything else that goes along with it...
I guess that's about it for now if we make the long story short...
Life is full of surprises! Live it and enjoy it while you can! | 
