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Brownidswty
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Name: Sarah
Interests: well...talking on im ..almost any kind of music..cuz it is my life..umm er..hanging wit friends, watching kickass movies, and meeting new people cuz rememeber kids..making friends is fun! i like to take pictures, sing (not in front of poepel tho) and uhh i like to sit on my ass and watch tv ..yay!
Expertise: BEING ME!
Occupation: Student
Industry: Entertainment
Message: message me
Member Since:
3/26/2005
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| Things change. Plans change, time changes...and people change. The last one seems to be the hardest concept for me to accept. Too many people in my life have changed, some for the better, but mostly not. It makes me so sad, and scared that I'm going to change to, and become someone I don't like. Or even worse someone that no one can like, and no one can love. I don't want that, but its so hard to stay positive sometimes about everything. It seems like too much is going on, and I know everyone has thier rough moments in life and I guess mine is now, but I just wish I could have the support of those people who aren't with me anymore. Not becaus they are dead or moved away...they only aren't here in thier minds. The person who they were died, and I'm afraid a part of me died with them. Last night.. I had a dream that I had died..I don't remember dying only waking up as a ghost. It was wierd..not everyone could see me, only a few select people. I don't know why I had this dream, it was so wierd..and real. I felt like I had actually died. I finally accepted my fate as a ghost and the fact that only certain people knew I was there...I think maybe it's these people that I should concentrate on in my life...the people that see me..the people that know I'm there, and the rest? ...well i don't know..maybe someday they will see me, but maybe for now I'm just not meant to see them. Whenever someone tells me about the fact that they are struggling, or I fight with them and we are struggling to get along I always tell them " you know... I know this is hard, but if life was easy all the time? ...well it would be boring" ..it seems easier advice to give than it is to accept even though there is alot of truth in it. Maybe I should start listening to myself. | | |
| I don't even know...Life is reallly messy, and I have to say... I'm not loving the drama, but at least school started and maybe things will change.. I still can't keep up with who's mad at me and why though.. | | |
| Now waking up is hard to do
And sleeping is impossible too
Everything is reminding me of you
What can I do?
It’s not right, not OK
Say the words that you say
Maybe we’re better off this way?
I’m not fine, I’m in pain
It’s harder everyday
Maybe we’re better off this way?
It’s better that we break…
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| wow, its been forever sinse I've written in this mofo, and ...alot has
happened. Currently I'm kinda sad b/c someone I love is going through a
hard time and won't talk to me, and since I am sort of part of his
troubles with our..sort of relationship, i kinda wish he'd let me know
what's going on? But, I guess sometimes its just best to give people
space right? ...right haha, SO this summer has been really
crazy, i've hardly been home cept for like the past week. Tons of
vacations, my brother leaving for college and a week later, here I am,
reading my LAST summer assignment for High school, and god is that
wierd, Bieng a senior scares the shiiiit out of me. What if i go
away to college and never see some of my best friends again?? I
actually have to start thinking about a career, I want to just stay a
kid, haha go to never never land and stay young forevaaa lol.
Unfortunatly, not possible. Lol, god i make everything too dramatic,
but I'm kinda in a melancholy mood. ...Any words of advice? : /
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| hi there, its been a while since I've written and I am feeling pretty good
I am proud of myself for getting good grades, and for excerising
more and eating right..most of the time, and making good use of my time
for the most part. I'm trying to live my life to the fullest ya! lol. I
even stopped talking to someone who makes me feel like shit, cuz, well
i just don't deserve that. Half of me wishes he would call tho, just so
i could tell him off and tell him all he ever did was let me down, its
too bad he won't call. He won't even read this, which is too bad as
well. But I'm sick of being let down, i don't need anyone to make me
happy cept for me. So yea, that's what i have realized these past
couple of weeks, and i feel very proud and i felt i should share haha.
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