Tuesday, May 06, 2008

  • Of Best Friends and Bathrooms

    I feel like updating. I also feel like taking a break from my Medical Research Paper. Thus, here I am.
        I spent the last two weeks in Big Sandy TX on staff at ALERT. I worked in the Camps and Conferences office most of the first week and Housekeeping the second. The homeschool conference was the second week and it was such an encouragement to see so many precious friends! Friends are about my favorite thing in life.
        When I wasn't chatting with friends I spent my time checking dorms, cleaning bathrooms, vacuuming floors, cleaning bathrooms, riding in golf carts (and nearly flying off the back,) cleaning bathrooms, making beds, cleaning bathrooms, eating blizzards, cleaning bathrooms, walking all over campus, cleaning bathrooms, serving cookies, and did I mention cleaning bathrooms?
        We had an exciting storm event, but not quite as exciting as last year's. Once again I thoroughly enjoyed my walkie, especially at exciting moments like the one when the 2,000 conference attendees were stuffed in bathrooms (my favorite places) all over the campus as we waited for two tornadoes to pass by.
        After sleeping the whole way home (excluding when we stopped for the night at Laura's house and stayed up until 12:30 talking) I dove into my AE assignments which I had managed to avoid all together for two weeks. On Sunday I leave for a friend's wedding! I get to be a bridesmaid! This is a first for me!
        In other news, my grandma quit taking her Paxil and thyroid medication for a week, and then was wondering why she was having stroke like symptoms. :blink:
        This has been a love break, but it's back to the research paper for a couple more hours before I head to bed!
    Blessings and Butterflies,
        Christy

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

  • The Covenant of Joy

    My vow:
    Whatsoever Thou sayest unto me, by Thy grace I will do it.

    My Constraint:
    Thy love, O Christ, my Lord.

    My Confidence:
    Thou art able to keep that which I have committed unto Thee.

    My Joy:
    To do Thy will, O God.

    My Discipline:
    That which I would not choose, but which Thy love appoints

    My Prayer:
    Conform my will to Thine.

    My Motto:
    Love to live, live to love.

    My Portion:
    The Lord is the portion of mine inheritance.

    Teach us, good Lord, to serve Thee as Thou deservest; to give and not to count the cost; to fight and not to heed the wounds; to toil and not to seek for rest; to labor and not to ask for any reward save that of knowing that we do Thy will, O Lord our God.
    ~Amy Carmichael

    May it be so with me.

Thursday, April 03, 2008

  • And You Mourn

    I replay the words over and over in my mind. “You wait, and ask God how to love them,” she said, “and you mourn.”

    A friend came over for lunch today. My mom, brother and I all sat around the table with her and talked. We talked as we have not in a very long time. We talked about dancing, about God’s will and planning our lives, about asking questions and about faith.

    Somewhere in the middle of it all, as we were jumping from subject to subject, I asked a question. “How do we love God? How do we accept His love through people without becoming too attached to the people themselves?” These are questions I have asked with tears at many points in my life. They have many names attached to them. The answers seem just as illusive as ever. How attached am I supposed to be to people? Why is it that I love people so much but they don’t seem to want to be around me? How can it be that a close friendship so quickly dissipates and suddenly we find nothing to talk about? Why do I still care so much? Why does it hurt so much? Little by little I have learned to not be so devastated by these losses, but I still ask the questions, and yes, I ask in tears.

    Today I was confronted by puzzled looks and cocked heads. “What is wrong,” I was asked, “with becoming attached to people? God shows us His love through them, and we show our love for Him through them as well.” I paused in confusion. Long ago God shattered the belief that I wasn’t supposed to depend on people because I only needed Him. He showed me that He uses people to give Himself to me. Still, was I not supposed to detach myself from the channel, and only cling to the One who was pouring Himself through them? Today I was given a different picture. I was told that we are to love the people God places in our lifes, and that love is never without attachment. Hmm.

    Then we moved on, talking about what we should question and the right and wrong ways to question. We finally cleaned up lunch and my friend went home. But my mind was still back on the subject of loving people. “Mom, did you mean that it is impossible to become too attached to people?” She paused, “Well, I lean heavily toward that. Of course, it is wrong to smother them, or to be so wrapped up in them that you exclude the other people in your life. But I do not believe we can love people too much.” The tears gathered in my eyes as I asked, “Then what are we supposed to do when the people we love push us away or do not have time for us, or no longer seem to need or want us?”

    “You wait, and ask God how to love them, and you mourn.”

    As I turned away to hide the tears flowing down my face I pondered that thought. Was it ok after all that I cared so deeply? Was it truly right for me to delight in the friends God has given me and to desire for them to delight in me as well? Was this not an expression of attachment to the “things of the world” as I had feared, but rather an expression of loving and being loved by God?

    It is good to love. And it is ok to mourn! It is good to mourn. This rings true in my spirit, but my heart still aches and wishes for an easier answer. And so it often is. Yet, what freedom!

    “No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us.” 1 John 4:12

Thursday, March 27, 2008

  • As I sit here, feet in the dirt, back to a tree, sun on my face, I cannot help but feel that I am loved and that the life stretched before me will be a beautiful adventure. Yes, God is good, for how could He be otherwise and have planned for me such a satisfying moment in time?

    It’s amazing the difference a little sunshine can make.

Saturday, March 22, 2008

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

  • Roads Are for Journeys Not Destinations

                My life stretched before me, full of possibility, full of impossible situations where God would show up and wow the world. I was sure of it. I lived in confidence that my God would do what He said He would do. He would be glorified. He would complete the work He had begun in me. He would show Himself strong. He would show the nations that He was God and they were but men.

    Then something unfathomable happened. God did not come through for me. I came up against a situation I was unable to deal with and God did not answer my cry for help. I knew it couldn’t be His fault – He is God after all. But I didn’t know where I had failed. It happened again and again. Thus began over four years laced with confusion, questioning, desperation, and hopelessness.

                Today, as I look back over my journals, I see an incredible journey unfolding. My helpless frustration resulted because I was looking for the end result too soon. I could not see where my road was heading. I felt I was floundering helplessly. But I was wrong. My goal should not be to live a perfect Christian life, but rather to know my God and delight in Him. This gives me a whole new perspective on the road I travel. I am no longer trying to get somewhere as quickly as possible. (Not that I was ever sure exactly where I should be going, and this was a huge frustration.) God is teaching me to wait on His timing. Roads are for journeys, not destinations.

                This journey is a peculiar one. I am beginning to see just how little the outcome depends on me. I am seeking to know God and I find it to be the easiest and the most difficult pursuit in the world, for I am discovering that God is not waiting on me to figure Him out but rather that Scripture states I am to wait on Him. The more I find myself to be nothing the more I stand it awe at all He is. The idea that I can, by some great assertion of my will, discover God or live in a manner that pleases Him is truly laughable.

                I still often find myself shrouded in confusion. Many times I cannot see God in the situations around me. I cannot fathom how He can be willing or allowing the pain of His children and the triumph of evil. In these moments I cling to the faith that He has been strengthening so beautifully. If He has always been good before, will He not continue? He promises that His ways and thoughts are not only different from mine, but higher.

    I am reminded of Elizabeth Elliot’s book “These Strange Ashes” where she tells the story of her first difficult year as a missionary. At the end of the year she looked back on four huge losses and next to no apparent gain. Yet looking back she says this,

    “Each separate experience of individual stripping we may learn to accept as a fragment of the suffering Christ bore when He took it all. “Surely he hath borne our griefs and carried our sorrows.” This grief, this sorrow, this total loss that empties my hands and breaks my heart, I may, if I will, accept, and by accepting it, I find in my hands something to offer. And so I give it back to Him, who in mysterious exchange gives Himself to me.”

    “And so it often is. Faith, prayer and obedience are our requirements. We are not offered in exchange immunity and exemption from the world’s woes. What we are offered has to do with another world altogether.”

                We are not of this world. Yet how quickly we become consumed with it and how painful we find the loss of its joys. If we would only turn our eyes to Jesus and look full in His wonderful face we would find a perspective altogether different from the one we know and, may I say, far superior because it is the perspective of the One who can see all of eternity in a single moment.

                So I walk on, hand in hand with the King of the universe, no longer straining my eyes for a glimpse of my destination but relishing the journey. My God, Jehovah, has most beautifully lead me. Will He not continue to do so?

                “Roads are for journeys, not destinations.”

                            It makes me happy.

Friday, January 18, 2008

  • Life continues to be interesting. Full of good friends, good books, and good laughter! I have found that it takes less to make me very happy than it used to. Things like green tea, hoodies, snow, a phone call, a post on my fb wall, a song, the laughter of a brother, a picture that brings back a memory, all seem to delight me more than they used to. I’m enjoying life I guess. I have been incredibly emotional (as always,) but little by little I guess I’m learning to take those emotions to the One who created them and not burden the world.

    This last week has been a whirlwind. I babysat for a friend, made some meals for Mom, we had unexpected company ~ friends from Mexico! I visited a church I used to attend, had a pizza party, took my little brother to the ER  (he’s fine now,) went out for lunch and a good talk with an old friend, and now I’m in a flurry of packing as I’m headed out to Advanced EXCEL on Monday! I am SO excited about this next adventure…

    And I suppose you want to hear a little about what I'll be up to:
    "Advanced EXCEL involves six weeks of intense training conducted at the Dallas Training Center, a home practicum period with various projects to complete, and concludes with several days of final training and graduation in Dallas. Course Topics: Discipleship | Spiritual Disciplines | Public Speaking | Writing | Life Purpose | Interior Design | Tailoring | Home Management | Leadership Training | Community and Political Involvement | Medical Research | Home Business and Ministry... And much more!"

    "In a day and age when individuals are enticed with normality, pursued with mediocrity, and bombarded with the overwhelming pressure to give up and give in to the call of the world... Advanced EXCEL stands in stark contrast to this situation, calling instead to the young lady of virtue with a passion to pursue Christ alone and change her world. These individuals are equipped to implement their God-ordained life purpose, impact their sphere of influence, and live the legacy of Christ in them!"

    I am so excited to begin this next adventure and pray God will do incredible things in me through it, mainly that He would teach me to love Him more.

    [For my determined purpose is] that I may know Him [that I may progressively become more deeply and intimately acquainted with Him, perceiving and recognizing and understanding the wonders of His Person more strongly and more clearly], and that I may in that same way come to know the power outflowing from His resurrection [which it exerts over believers], and that I may so share His sufferings as to be continually transformed [in spirit into His likeness even] to His death, [in the hope] That if possible I may attain to the [spiritual and moral] resurrection [that lifts me] out from among the dead [even while in the body]. Philippians 3:10-11AMP

    Any yes, this does mean that I will be away from the internet again. Just for 6 weeks this time.

    Smiles,
    Christy


    Looking forward to seeing these dear friends again!

Tuesday, January 01, 2008

  • 12:19 AM
    Tuesday, January 1st, 2008
    Can you believe it?
    I wonder... what will I be looking back on a year from now?

    Father would you

     ~ Incline our hearts to You and Your Word (Psalm 119:36)

                To cause to slope toward You.

    ~ Open the eyes of our hearts to see what is truly in Your Word (Psalm 119:18)

                That it would grab our hearts.

    ~ Enlighten our hearts (Ephesians 1:18)

                We are distracted. Flood the eyes of our hearts with light.

    ~Unite our heats to fear Your name (Psalm 86:11)

                That we would stand in awe of Your character

    ~ Satisfy our hearts with Your mercy (Psalm 90:14)

                So that we want You more than we want the world. So that we may rejoice!

    That we might walk in a manner worthy of Your calling. (Colossians 1:10)




Saturday, December 29, 2007

  • I pity boys. That is, I pity them for the socks they wear.
    Their socks aren't slippery.
    I can't imagine how boring life would be without slippery socks ~ they are a great joy in my life.
    You see, we have a nice long hall...
    And so I have loaned out two pairs of socks, one stripped and one flowered. My little brothers are now sliding up and down the hall to their hearts' delight.
    I pity boys and the socks they wear.

Friday, December 21, 2007

  • Just in case anyone is interested...

    I thought I'd tell you what I've been up to since EXCEL.
    It took me about a week to recuperate from the culture shock. Unpacking was also a major ordeal. Just when I thought I was about done I realized I had two big boxes left. Who ever would have thought I could put so much stuff in two little brown boxes!

    I have enjoyed spending time with my family and always looking out the window to see my special mountains!

    It seems that the littlest things have made me happy since I've been home: A cup of tea, a hoodie, curly hair, emails from friends... all have managed to make me grin for hours or giggle like an excited child.

    Thanksgiving at our house was extra laid back this year. And of course all the baking was characterized by our typical 'tower of flours' due to the gluten-free members of our family.

    We got new furniture in our living room just after I got home and we have all enjoyed not having to warn guests not to sit in our chairs unless they wish to tip over.

    Nathaniel turned 5 just after Thanksgiving. We gave him the traditional breakfast in bed.... and a couple presents

    Some of us aren't as young as we used to be... and have a hard time staying awake at these special moments.

    Nathan got a (much needed) dresser for his birthday

    And some Legos. Seeing that he is now a mature five year old he decided that this was a good year to start putting his Legos together by himself... with a little help from a big brother. I would have to say that this process fully initiated him into the role of Wishart boy. I wonder how many birthdays have been spent with all the boys crowded around Lego sets on the dining room table.

    We only do big birthday parties certain years, but five is one of them. Mom and I had so much fun decorating! The curly ribbon and crepe paper reminded me of many early mornings sneaking down halls at EXCEL

    We played many special games made up by the birthday boy, often involving paper airplanes

    The kids also enjoyed a cute craft.
     
    And came up with many created ways of wearing it.
     

    Nathan had a airplane cake. My poor mother has always done a great job creating the unusual cakes we Wishart kids have asked for. The most memorable, I think, was when Ben asked for 'our house'.

    I think it was an adorable party enjoyed by an adorable five year old!


    Next on the list of priorities was a Christmas tree. We returned to the place we found last year and had a very similar, much enjoyed experience.
    We seemed much less decicive this year, however, and wandered the field for a redilulous amound of time, the silence pierced every few minutes by a call from an excited family member who had found the perfect tree... but we never could seem to agree.

    We finally found it. And it was even bigger than last years. Now that's saying something.

    His name is Bert.

    We then had our crazy week full of ConDeo and other choir related activities. We spent many hours driving to Greeley and back.

    We enjoyed our traditional Village Inn excursion after the highschool concert. Friends are special.

    Shoppers in Disguise was a bit of a challenge for me this year but after lots of good ideas from friends I think it ended up being my favorite disguise.... maybe even my favorite year all aroud. Yes, I think it just might have been. This picture doesn't give you the faintest idea how we really looked, but oh well.

    I think that just about brings us to the present day. I'm staying busy helping Mom, doing Christmasy things, and playing with the little boys.
     
    Yesterday was Joshua's birthday. He turned 10, which is also a party-worthy age.

    The birthday dinner? Octipi on seaweed. Per tradition.

    Followed by pie for dessert

    Last night Jon, Ben and I went to a youth group activity as our youth pastor's house. I drank a cup of green tea before I left. Scary.
    We played the crazy chocolate bar game. Only Pastor Thad...
    The chocolate was yummy though

    Everyone got rather vicious and our utensles were... um... distroyed.
     
    Wassail is the taste of Christmas... and good friends make it even better!
     
    It was a short, but lovely evening.
     
    And that brings us right up to the present day!
    I hope you enjoyed your peek into my life!
    You are all precious to me!
    Christelyn

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    • Name: Christy
    • Country: United States
    • State: Colorado
    • Metro: Fort Collins
    • Member Since: 1/3/2005

About Me

  • God has revealed Himself to me as my Lord and Master. The One who has complete authority in my life, is my only resource for each task He assigns to me, and desires to cultivate a intimate relationship with me. I have been given boldness to claim the righteousness of Christ and to speak truth to others with humility and power. Before the Lord I am qualified to share in Christ’s inheritance, and an ambassador of Christ. God has called me to serve with joy in whatever position He places me. I desire to share my vision of dedicated, humble, Spirit-filled ambassadors with families by encouraging and discipling young ladies and working with children. Above all I desire to be a prayer warrior. I would like to be known as a daughter of the King, who recognizes her deprivation, stands in the power of Christ, delights in the word of God, and is a testimony to His grace in her life.

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  • Miss_Sarah15
    Looking forward to seeing you in July!
  • Miss_Sarah15
    Yes! I like the new profile options... :-) Thanks for commenting on my chatboard.