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ChrisRusso
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Name: Chris
Country: United States
State: New York
Metro: Long Island
Interests: Traveling, writing, reading, sketching, debating, writing, praying, singing to my Father, collecting oddments from other countries, hiking through the wilderness, writing, dreaming, stargazing, pondering, musing, thinking, hypothesising, sojourning, writing, muttering, whispering, writing......and discussing the relevance of Jesus in the modern day.
Expertise: Still learning. Always learning.
Occupation: Teacher, Writer, Philosopher
Industry: The subconscious
Message: message meEmail: email me
Member Since:
6/4/2003
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| They Will Know We Are Christians By Our T-Shirts, By Our T-Shirts...The people who created these products,
whether in poor taste or not, were all sincere in their desires to
integrate their faith into their lives and the lives of
others.
--SwordandSacrifice, comment on "Weirdest
Christian Alternatives to Secular
Products"
I
think it shows shallow thinking and poor artistic taste. Certainly neither of those is an enviable quality. But they’re not really evil, either. As much
as I hate to admit it, someone can be a shallow thinker with poor artistic taste
and still be a perfectly decent human. And
you don’t need to be blessed with an especially clever mind or a fine cultural
upbringing to love God and love your neighbor, which I recall Somebody once
saying were the two things that matter most.
Of course, this assumes that there actually is something
deeper to one’s Christian life than the shallow, tacky slogans. This is what most people seem to fear (or,
depending on your viewpoint, to enjoy): that there is nothing more happening in
Christians’ brains than the bouncing around of the shallow slogans on their
products. If that’s true, then for
shame, for shame.
--PasstheAura, "Blood, Bambi II, and the Nature of Christian Kitsch"
On Xanga and ReveLife during the last few days, the subject of Christian moichendising has been kicked around a lot. Particularly those avenues of Christian moichendising which are considered by some (like me) to be "tacky," "cheesy," and "in poor taste." Products such as "Christoga" (Christian yoga videos), "Bibleman" (a Christian Batman who fights villains with plastic lightsabers), or the "Dance Praise Dance Pad" (a Christian version of Dance Dance Revolution) have been brought up to be either ridiculed or defended.
I myself am torn on this issue. Because on the one hand, PasstheAura is very right (in his excellent post on the subject which I cannot recommend enough) that not only can the kitschiness be mere bad packaging on a good product (i.e. a Christian who is really walking the walk), but the kitschiness can even be a method to get people to hear a great message. And, while I certainly don't share SwordandSacrifice's certainty of their sincerity (the whole thing smells too den-of-thieves for my peace of mind), I have to admit that he may be right too--it's possible that these manufacturers are actually being sincere in their desire to integrate faith and life.
But on the other hand, in addition to my artistic disgust at the nature of these products, but oftentimes there is a slippery under-message to these "Christian" products. It's more than just tackiness. I can't help but feel that many Christian products--T-shirts especially--demonstrate misplaced priorities. (And yes, I'll admit, there's a little bitterness too, being that I wore corny Christian T-shirts as a young teen before my artistic sense matured and I realized how silly I looked).
Enough abstract talk. Let's examine some products that bother me.
1) Hellshirts
    
"Hellshirts" are Christian T-shirts designed to tell the viewer that they are going to hell (while the wearer of the shirt is not). Presumably the viewer is supposed to go up to the wearer and beg to find out how they can avoid going to hell.
Now don't get me wrong. As a Christian, I believe that Hell exists. It is one of the basic tenants of my faith. But is it really what we want to start off with when speaking to someone?
Who is the intended audience of these shirts? It's either A) Christians, or B) nonChristians. If the intended audience is Christians, then seeing this shirt would make them want to congratulate themselves on having avoided Hell: in short, self-righteousness. Not exactly humility-inducing. And if the intended audience is one comprised of nonChristians... you're trying to scare them into becoming Christians. You're basically threatening them will Hell if they don't convert. But that sort of tactic is dangerous: it treats Christianity as little more than fire insurance. Such a message may, at best, make converts. But it will not make disciples.
When Jesus was asked why he had come, he did NOT answer, "To save you sinners from Hell." That is part of what he did, yes, but it was not his primary objective in coming. (*gasp!*) His actual answer: "That you may have life, and life more abundant." Jesus's number one sermon topic was not Hell, though he did talk about it a decent amount. His number one sermon topic wasn't heaven, either. It was "the kingdom of heaven," that is, the realm on Earth in which God's will is done. He invited people to be part of "the kingdom of heaven." He said to people, "Follow me." That was his message.
Hellshirts have their priorities wrong. And really, how many people have converted--or even asked the wearer about Jesus--because of Hellshirts? They seem designed more to offend and to divide than to invite and to inspire. And thus, I contend that Hellshirts have a dangerous mentality behind them.
2) Satanshirts
 
I have a lesser beef with these, but it's still there. Satanshirts tend to be very macho shirts which mock the devil, crowing over Satan's defeat, that sort of thing.
And there's a lot of truth in there. In the Christian faith, Satan IS defeated, and IS powerless against the authority of Jesus (which every disciple of Jesus has access to). However...
However where is the focus of these shirts? Look at the first one. "Satan's Worst Nightmare." Unless the wearer of this shirt is Jesus, this shirt is wrong. I am not Satan's Worst Nightmare, and any thwarting I do to the Enemy is not through my strength. Whose strength are we celebrating here? On my own I cannot take on the Enemy--my own strength is nonexistent. He is higher in the order of creation than I: even Michael couldn't take him on alone. At best I am a kid mocking the school bully while hiding behind his older pro-wrestling brother.
In short, I am bothered by the implicit misplaced pride here.
3) Imposters
We saw a lot of non-shirt examples of imposters in the Revelife discussion. Christian versions of secular videogames. Christian versions of secular superheros. Christian versions of secular fads.
Christian moichendising seems to adore impersonating popular secular trends.
           
God may still be able to use these, but they give my sense of humor a massive coronary.
Why do Christians seems so desperate to make their slogans and products fit in? Why so desperate to copy secular fads? Does someone really think that a young nonChristian teenager who loves to eat at Subway will see a Christian the HisWay shirt and instantly be smitten with love for Jesus? Or that a little girl who loves the PowerPuff Girls will really be fooled by the God's Girl shirt? Do little kids who were Batman fans first really accept Bibleman as a noncaloric substitute?
I'm reminded of the Christian manga where the Christians blackmailed the blue-haired bad girl into attending a prayer group. Do we really need to TRICK people into Christianity?
The whole thing smells of marketing. Marketing sees something become popular (through that impossible-to-predict combination of timing, youth culture, and appeal that makes things become popular) and suddenly all the knockoffs come out. Example: The Lord of the Rings trilogy was an incredible commercial success. Suddenly all the movie studios' ears perk up, and dollar signs appear in their eyes. Suddenly we get a rash of "epic fantasy films" coming out, for good or for ill, desperately trying to imitate LOTR's success. Suddenly the Sci-Fi channel is making its inimitiable TV B-movies like "Dragon Storm" ("Starring such-an-such an actor who played a minor role in LOTR!") or "Elven Quest."
Why are Christians... marketing? Is God a product to be commodified?
I'm not saying I'm against Christian products in their entirety, but the imitation factor speaks of a misplaced priority. Your T-shirts will never make God "cool." God is something outside time and space and culture; "cool" will flux and change with the passing days but God remains as he is. Why are you trying so hard to make Christianity something palatable to secular fashion? It will never work. Ever.
Cheap knockoffs. That's what Christian imitation products end up being. And a prime example of this is the Christian cinema.
Let's face it: decent Christian movies are a rare thing. Most have bad acting, bad dialogue, bad editing, bad casting... Out of the few good ones out there, most were made by secular studios.
Christian imitation products try too hard to be something that someone else has done. I would much rather see Christian artistry work on simply developing its own art, independant of what the secular versions are doing. Making a Christian videogame? Make it the best videogame you can come up with, and don't worry about trying to make it a Christian version of Mortal Kombat. (Samson vs. Goliath; Round One. FIGHT!) Making a Christian T-shirt? Think of original designs, create out of what you love and who you are. Don't try to copy someone else's product.
(Inevitably my readership will no doubt wonder how this relates to Christian music, which after all is often in the genres created by secular artists: rock, rap, ska, alternative. I will point out that there is a difference between imitating anothers' product and creating in the same genre as another. For example: Phil Keaggy is a fingerstyle rock guitarist, and this might put him in vaguely the same genre as Jimi Hendrix. But Keaggy does not try to be 'The Christian Jimi Hendrix.' For another example: say I made a Christian T-shirt with an original logo on it. This shirt would be in the same genre as the "Subway" logo, because both are logos. But the HisWay shirt is not just in the same genre, it is a direct imitation of the Subway logo. There's a difference.)
(Of course, this does not exempt all CCM groups/artists. I'm looking at you, Plus One.)
4) Acronyms
Christians seem very fond of acronyms.
   
Not all Christian acronyms are bad. I know that several people I love are fond of F.R.O.G. (Fully Relying On God). And to be fair, acronyms have long been a part of Christianity. One of the oldest Christian symbols, the fish, was used because ΙΧΘΥΣ (fish) was a Greek acronym for Iesous Christos Theos Huios Soter. (So Jesus fish were the first Christian T-shirts, perhaps?)
But again, many Christian acronym products seem to be trying to be something they're not. Trying to look like CIA shirts, FBI shirts (Firm Believer In christ?), and police shirts (I am amused by the fact that the POLICE shirt should really be PTOTLWSIJCE). I guess many fall into a subset of the Impostershirt category.
5) General Objection: What's In Your Wallet?
I just worry that Christianity has become little more than a niche market. Christian products are a multi-million dollar business. We spend money on Christian T-shirts, wall hangings, engraved copies of the poem Footprints, CDs, crosses in all shapes and sizes... And I'm not saying it's wrong to buy or own things--I'm not an aescetic. But... is this really important?
Here's a sobering stat. 50 million Christian CDs were sold in 2002, but only $0.10 of every $100 earned by Christians are given to foreign missions.
And look. I buy T-shirts. I have some Christian CDs. But I just want to keep things in proper perspective. Is this stuff really important? No.
I have several responsibilities as a Christian. One of which is to use my money as a good steward, not as though the money is my own. Another of which is to act like Jesus, no matter what T-shirt I am wearing. (And that, my friend, will catch someone's attention far more than the flashiest shirt.)
I just want to see Western Christians focussing less on their niche subculture and more on disciple-making.
How To Make A Good Christian Product
First. Be Original. No imitations, no impostering. God has given you creative talents: use them well! When He wanted the tabernacle made, he empowered and inspired various artisans to create his resting place...
If you want to invert or satirize a secular trend, that's different, but don't imitate. Be distinctly you. (I have a shirt containing Neil Gaiman's inversion of Marx's religion quote: "Opiates are the religion of the masses." I've heard of someone named Tim wearing a shirt with a picture of Jesus on it, and in the picture Jesus is wearing a shirt that says 'Tim is my Homeboy.')
Second: Be Scriptural. Make sure the message of your product or shirt lines up with what Jesus said, and what the basics of Christianity are. (Which means Hellshirts and Satanshirts are out.) Avoid dangerous implications.
Third: Be Thought-Provoking. Perhaps have the product or shirt make an absurd-sounding statement, or even a shocking statement--something that will make people want to ask the wearer what the heck his shirt means. Don't neccessarily provide all the answers right on the shirt: raise questions.
Fourth: Be Entertaining. Self-deprecating, even. Funny is good. Christians are allowed to laugh, no matter what Brother Jorge from The Name of the Rose said.
Some I like:
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| Anti-What does it mean to be Anti-American, Anti-Christian, Anti-Muslim, Anti-Semitic? What must one do to merit the "anti-" prefix?
Actions I can understand. I would not hesitate to call one who does not allow Jewish people into his restaurant an anti-Semite. I would not hesitate to call one who spits on Tibetan monks anti-Buddhist.
But what of words? What does it take? Is a single use of a negative appellation enough? What about an off-color joke? How much does it take to earn one the label?
I'll use an example. Recently Barack Obama made a joke about most Americans being Anglophonic monoglots. "It's embarrassing when Europeans come over here, they all
speak English, they speak French, they speak German. And then we go
over to Europe and all we can say is 'merci beaucoup!'" For this (and possibly for the ongoing flag-pin thing) some are calling him "anti-American." Others are saying that the joke (but not the person) was anti-American.
Was it? Is he?
The joke is an observation. An observation that Europeans tend to be polyglottal, whereas most Americans don't even know their own language. It's an observation with an implicit criticism. I, as an English teacher, have shared both that observation and that criticism on various occasions. And I, as a traveler, have made that observation about Europeans as well. I've met Brits who spoke German and Italian better than I speak English; I've met Italians who spoke Greek and French and Belgian; I've been greeted in strange countries in my native tongue; and those Swiss speak just about every damn language there is.
In sharing this observation, and this criticism, is my criticism anti-American? Do I myself BECOME an anti-American?
For some it seems to be. For some you are not allowed to criticize their [country, faith, ethnicity] without becoming an anti-. Others, perhaps, have thicker skins...
But I will disagree. I will say that criticism might mean that I am a pro-. I might criticize Americans because I love America and wish to see her improve (see: James Baldwin). I might criticize Christianity because I am a Christian and love Jesus and wish to see Jesus' people represent him well. In fact, such motivations might drive me to criticize MORE.
But if not criticism, where is the line at which one becomes an anti-? Is it insult? If I call someone a "nappy-headed ho", does that make me [anti-black/anti-women] (depending on who you ask)?
And thus I ask you, Xangans: what makes someone an anti-? Criticism, insult, action, or somewhere in between?
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| SheShe: *twining her finger around a lock of hair* Wow. The sun has made your hair get a lot lighter.
Me: ...
She: *pulling on the lock* Oh. Wait. That's my hair.
She: *jumping out at me as soon as I open the bathroom door* RAWR!!!
Me: *throwing up one arm in a defensive gesture*
She: *laughing* I got you!
Me: No you didn't.
She: I totally got you.
Me: I didn't scream or anything--how did you get me?
She: You flailed.
Me: I so did not flail. I was defending myself.
She: You were defending yourself by flailing helplessly.
Me: It wasn't a flail! I was shielding my eyes and head, and simultaneously ready to grab your arm and pin it. It was, like, I was getting ready for a judo move or something.
She: Okay. So you were doing a judo flail.
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| PAH*throws things*
*kicks things*
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| Preparing for a Physical1) Make sure you have your health insurance card.
2) Write down the name of your doctor, time of appointment, and directions to the medical center.
3) Take a shower.
4) Eat lightly all day.
5) After some consideration, take a second shower. Use extra soap in certain areas of your anatomy.
6) Congratulate yourself on being under 30 and thus not needing a prostate exam yet.
7) After thinking about it, use extra soap there too in case the doc decides to get a head start.
8) Consider canceling your appointment.
9) Consider chopping off a limb to drastically lower your body weight and defeat that BMI chart.
10) Drink lots of water so you'll be okay when asked for a urine sample.
I hate doctors.
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