My Future......I have been thinking heavily about that lately...... I set my goal since the age of 16. All along every step I took was targeted toward that goal and I used my best endeavours in the process. I enjoyed that, regardless of the stress and tears and depression. Now, it's 4 months away until I reach my goal, and I feel that I don't want it. The logical reason being my goal is materially different from what I contemplated. But on second thought, it may have nothing to do with the goal itself. It has always been the way it used to be. To put it more precisely, the real reason being I have been striving towards my goal, not my dream, or I have made the error (rightly or wrongly) of mixing up the two. I know I am gradually gradually gradually narrowing and killing my intellect...... Money matters, as it used to be, without which fulfiling one's dream is beyond the question. But what should one do if it goes back murdering one's dream? It was as if I am about to marry the ideal man, but I don't love him. | 
