I was mugged last night. The shock has just worn off. I am still physically sore, but I am moving my thoughts to better places - like yesterday.  It was friendly and fun.
I could put the boy in prison - he was caught and there will be a hearing.

What hurt the most -
the statement taking, i was and am concussed - it was...

fuck it - can't think

Yesterday was a high. I was in that place of clarity - where the I could think and understand the information I was perceiving eloquently, fearlessly and most of all with effortless intelligence. That palce where the world is fascinating.
But today I am back to that place, the one in which my solidarities have moved onto different wavelengths and I am merely a mortal. Another drop in this sea. Being on acid, I have noticed the loops - the feeling that you have never left a place you are in - that it has always been there, even when you thought you left it. Even if you just got there. The trick lies in creating more spaces, and that is where the mind of creation comes in. But anyway - I am back in this place (the one I often seem to write in).   I guess  it makes sense, people couldn't function on creation energy forever. The perceptions and the self retreats, to mull upon the ideas and rest. Although it doesn't rest, it recedes. I recede. This is when we wait, for the next wave. The next clarity. And until then I have my sweets that I eat too much off and the events in these limbo moments that distract me for a moment - like when someone walks into CowMoon. I have just realized that I haven't written this to be properly read, the thoughts may seem jumbled - but I cannot know another's perception. My thoughts make me seem like I should be a person of consequence, but  practice will  negate this.  I am not sure why i am here, or what is to be done.  I don't create, I feel creation - I should add something material to this plane. For I feel the shortness of my youth and how this is futile. That oddly does not depress me. It means I don't have to do anything. Maybe I should become an academic.

No things of beauty
Nothing today Sir - I won't feed you. I won't delight you. Today I am inside.

I am deceptively nice

We - us- have betrayed ourselves.
Me - I - knew you needed, I do too, so we banded together in a painful solidarity
knowing that we are at the bottom of the fence- the other side. trying desperately.
Clammy and stripped, I need to be away.
Soon, now,  before I am left wit h nothing.  After you have drained me, again and again, because i was willing to give. I speak in sickly sweetness, smile inappropriately and wait for the moment I stop the drugs and candy. Always tomorrow. The issues were disregarded, rightfully - now you girly friends have lead me to rest here.


I would just rather listen to the music - for this is total Bullshit.