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| | Because Splenda was made for me and so were youI realized something pretty important this weekend. I've been a bit of a hypocrite. The revelation emerged when I started to think about my expectations for other people, namely one Craig Robert. I do expect a lot from him, and I think that's okay, maybe even completely necessary. But it occurred to me that I shouldn't expect anything that I don't give him in return. And I might not be holding up my end of the deal on that one. You'll see...
Over the years I've learned that one of the greatest things about being in a relationship is developing a deep and wholistic understanding of your significant other; I mean truly knowing that other person, what makes him uniquely him, what he likes, what scares him, what matters to him, etc. As a rule, I think women tend to expect everyone, especially men, to be more intuitive than is almost possible. I am ridiculously guilty of this. In an effort to even the score, I'm gonna lay it all out there. That is, I'm going to let out my biggest secrets: what makes me tick. I like to think most of it won't surprise you...but there I go again.
As a rule, I try not to let minor problems upset me too much. However, the compaction of trivialities and the repitition of the same small incidents is a completely different story. If I say some behavior bothers me more than three times, you can expect a lot of anger. If I've been saying it for over a year, you can expect an f-ing outrage.
I'm sensitive. Absurdly and overwhelmingly at times. I put a lot of weight on the words and actions of the people I care about the most. I overanalyze. I hear what you say, but also what you don't say and what I think you might really be saying.
I don't like to shower. I think it's a waste of time. I hate showering in the winter because of the cold. I don't like the time it takes to dry and style my hair or the effort of picking out a new outfit. Pretty much the only time I appreciate a shower is when I'm sweaty or literally dirty.
When under the influence of alcohol, two things are almost bound to happen.
1) I become passionate. Passionate about my feelings for people, places and things, passionate about my likes and dislikes, passionate about music, passionate about books, passionate about food, passionate about anything.
2) My biggest insecurities are intensified. This is why, if I start crying and insisting that you don't like me, it's best just to hug me and reassure me and it's probably the worst idea ever to tell me to just shut up.
I love surprises. LOVE.
My obsessions are important to me. These include (but are not limited to) cooking, writing/reading, and my favorite tv shows. If you play a significant role in my life, it's important to me that you show at least some interest in my obsessions, especially the more personal ones. I need you to want to read what I've written and to be excited when I make a meal for you (This is an area in which I realize I've been slacking. I tend to brush off videos and research that Craig gets really excited about. Note to self: play fair).
When I'm sad, angry or just feeling weird (which happens more than you might realize), I clean or bake.
I am genetically predisposed to passive aggression ("she get it from her momma"). Unless I am very close to you and trust that you actually care about how I feel (I can only think of two people who fit that description who aren't family), I will probably never tell you that I'm upset with you. If you ask, I'll probably open up, at least a little anyways.
I don't like to be pushed. I realize that sometimes it's necessary and I really am grateful for most of the pushes I get. But some activities I just don't like. And when I insist, I want that insistence respected (Note to self: don't push too hard).
Promises are a big deal to me. If I hear the word "promise," you can bet I"ll remember what it pertains to. And if you don't follow through, you can bet I'll feel a bit hurt, a bit let down and a bit less trustful of you. So if you don't really mean "I promise," please please please don't say it.
I'm not good at staying up late. Late at night, it takes some kind of activity or lively atmosphere to keep me going. When I get tired, sleep is pretty much the only thing on my mind. Things that make me especially sleepy: watching movies/tv, watching people play games (especially of the video variety), being left alone and the clock turning past 2 a.m.
I'm afraid of snakes, unstable heights and having my head covered by anything (including hands, blankets and water).
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In keeping with my attempt to even things out, it only seems fair to enumerate at least some of the things that I feel make Craig that special person.
He is relatively fearless. Link is his favorite video game character. He likes to stay up very late and sleep in very late. He is self conscious, mainly about his hair and his weight. He has a good memory. He is very intelligent. He is practical, logical and reasonable. Motorcross fascinates him--he wishes he could do it. He idolizes Jimmy Page and Eric Clapton because of their guitar playing abilities--he aspires to be half as good as them. He is almost completely devoid of tact. He is horrible at lying. He's not good at online conversations unless you're talking about something significant. He rarely stays mad for more than 20 minutes at a time. He has a habit of ignoring problems instead of confronting them. He likes to describe things and tell stories in great detail. If he's ranting about something and you think he's done, give him five more minutes; he's got something else to say. He used to be an obsessive shower-er; after 2 years of being with me, he's gotten a little lax. He almost never lets on when people hurt him. Under the influence of alcohol, he tends to get rather chatty. If he's on the phone with me and no one's around, he'll say "I love you" every few minutes; if someone else is there, I'll hear it twice (and that's ok). He is very predictable (and that's ok, too; consistency is wonderful). He likes action movies, especially ones involving a hero of some sort. He is a Conservative who is against abortion but not stem cell research. I've never really seen him stressed. He generally waits until the last minute to study or do homework (but that's going to change, right, doc?  ). He likes to drive fast. He becomes insolent when faced with condescension. He finds it almost impossible to be one time because he is incredibly pokey when it comes to getting ready. Lemondade is his favorite beverage. He really likes rootbeer, too. He almost never gets jealous. He is ridiculously stubborn. He is needy when it comes to affection. When he grocery shops, he buys pasta, apples, pizza, bread, juice, cheese and lunch meat. He'll probably be upset with me for putting all of this on here...but then he'll realize that everything is true and that if he were different in any way, I might not love him quite as much.
impressed if you made it the whole way through,
Lucy Renee
| | | Posted 8/13/2006 10:32 PM - 4 comments
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