i'm not waiting for the world to change....

                                      .........i'm out changing it!

 HAPPY NEW YEARS EVE ALL!

deleted...

put away...

thrown out...

....

All of it.

I'm leaving for college in a few days and i'm leaving it all behind. EVERYTHING..not a single ounce of drama or anything else is going with me. no regrets. no thinking that maybe i could have fixed things. nothing..because i dont care. god has a plan. i trust him completely. i've already met someone else..actually many someone else's..there will be even more when i actually get to oxford...i have lost nothing and gained everything. a new respect for myself. a deeper understanding of what i want..in life..in college...in relationships..in love...even in my religion...i know now for a fact that i am worth so much more. i have more passion for life and love to share than anyone you have every known. and i thank god and my parents for it everyday. So thats it. i'm over it. everything..because i've realized the only thing that i did regret about anything is not realizing how truly amazing i am and that i can get anything i want...but you know what...i am worth much much more...my heart is open and ready and willing for the next thing.. and i already know that its going to be an amazing ride...

So i leave you with this challenge....Its your choice...

You can live a life being sheltered, afraid to buck against the norm, go against what your parents say, always doing what is safe...

or

You can live a life of freedom, retaliating against the norm, fighting some of the things your parents say, take a walk on the wild side...

Your choice...

Dull, bland, meaningless...

or

Exciting, passionate, fulfilling..

I know what choice i have made, but do you?

Life's to short to be anything but happy

A wise friend once told me.......

"Laugh when you can, apologize when you should, let go of what you can't change, kiss slowly, love deeply, play hard, forgive quickly, take chances, give everything, have no regrets. Life's too short to be anything but happy."

.......................................................and you know what, she's really right. Think about it like I do. I laugh all the time, mostly at myself, because honestly, does it make sense to get mad when you embarrass yourself? NO WAY! it makes much better sense to just laugh. And I believe that when you are in the wrong you should always be open to giving an apology, its the right thing to do even though it might not always be the easiest one. Now this is the hard one, letting go of what you can't change. That can be really hard. I can't change what I have done in the past, but I can build an even better tomorrow. Kiss slowy. Well now, that one's just plain tricky. Lol..ok well it does have a point, to savour ever single kiss that you have with the one that you love, cause you never know when it will be the last one. Love deeply. I look at those two words and know that that is exactly how I want to love and be loved. Deeply, completely, without reservations, and in such an openness that its incredible. Anyway, we all know that I play pretty hard cause i'm always ending up with bruises.  Forgiving can be a very hard thing to do, much less easily, but it  is something to keep in mind at all times. I take chances at times, what I wish I did more of was express all the things in my heart. i do a little but i'm too shy or scared or something. but don't worry i'm working on it. Give everything cause what you give to someone else can make the biggest difference in their lives. Don't have regrets, cause every moment you regret something is a moment you loose of happiness. So you know what, it all really does boil down to life being to short to be anything but happy.

Currently Listening Backstreet Boys [ENHANCED CD] By Backstreet Boys All i have to give see related

so here it is...finally...i'm done with school...all thats left is graduation. *sigh* i can't believe it. the past 12 years of my life have built to this and, i'm speechless. I dont think i could wish for a better life, or senior year. I mean i've had my moments, but everything's going to be ok. I'm going to return to my normal self, no longer an emotional basketcase, once graduation is over. Honestly, lets think about it. I look better than i have my entire life, i'm somewhat confident (but i still do need someone telling me i'm beautiful), i can sing pretty well, i've got an amazing boyfriend who is sticking with me through all my craziness,( i'm really lucky..its the truth..), my two best friends are awesome and hilarious as ever, my family is its normal crazy Italian self, i'm going to the college of my dreams, and my roommate is really nice! Its been a PHENOMENAL senior year and if this is just a bit of what to expect for the rest of my life then i am totally stoked. i'm more than happy with everything, really. If i'm crying its because i can't believe its over and i'm going to miss all my friends. But as someone wise has told me, I'll make new ones, and i'll still stay in contact with some of the old. (thanks...you're right ) so this is what i've got to say. Hello world, come and get me, cause i'm ready to take you on!!!

The Brookwood High School Chamber Ensemble's Final Performance
April 22, 2006 @ 3:00 PM
Price: $5
Location: TBA
All money benefits Relay for Life

Be there...i'm singing....by myself...it doesnt happen often and its for a good cause...so be there...or else small elves will come and attack you with a stick..lol...