Today’s Topic: Battle of Stupidity

So who’s dumber: A teenage girl or a black guy? I present this question because the amount of stupidity that either of these fucknuts can generate boggles the mind. If electrodes were attached to their temples, there would be enough stupidity to power a small city. Of robots. That do nothing but soak up stupidity.

Let’s reflect upon this question rationally. A teenage girl you say? Why…she must be emotionally and hormonally unstable, have overly idealize notions of romanticism, and would irrationally do the dumbest shit you can think of on a whim. Oh but wait, the black guy is… well… black… so the sky’s the limit on this one.

Speculation is all well and good, but without specific references, there just cannot be a fair and valid response. Enter Dawn of the Dead.

Dumb Broad vs. Nigger with a baby on the way

Scenario #1:

            A group of strangers hole up in a mall to escape a shitload of zombies. A straggler is stuck in a building across the street, desperately in need of food. The group finds a dog, and decides to send it with food across a sea of zombies ready for blood. The dog makes it to the building, but the zombies over-power the straggler and traps him and the dog in the building. A kind hearted young girl who grew so attached to the dog that she’s only known for 2 days, steals a truck, drives frantically through the throng of zombies to rescue the pup only to trap herself in the building with the straggler, who now has already been turned into a zombie. The group, seeing that the dumb fuck is about to get trapped, tries to warn her to get out, only to get screams of idiocy. Yes you crackwhore, you’ve managed to verify the well-being of a fucking dog, but now the entire cast has to try to save your retarded ass. What exactly was going through your mind?

“OMG!! The dog!! Won’t someone please save the dog!! Wait! I know! If I take the truck, and drive it over there where all the killer zombies are without taking a gun, combat training, or brain cells, I can safely retrieve the dog without the help of skilled professionals.”

            Congratulations, you’ve accomplished nothing. Get used to it; it’s going to come up a lot in the future.

Scenario #2:

            There are zombies. Zombies make other zombies by biting. Black guy has a pregnant wife. Black guy wants a family to make up for all the nigger shit he’s done. Wife gets bit by zombie. Black guy hides it from the rest of the group. Group doesn’t know black guy’s keeping his zombie wife tided down in a room. The zombie wife turns full zombie, but black guy doesn’t care. Black guy wants baby, black guy lets the baby come out. Old lady checks up on them, sees the zombie wife, and puts a bullet in the bitch's head. Black guy accuses old crone of trying to kill his already dead family, and puts a few rounds into her. But not before the old lady takes down the nigger in one shot.

            To recap – nigger wants a baby so bad he doesn’t even know it’s a fucking zombie coming out of his dead wife, and jeopardizes the safety of the entire group so he can win “Father of the Year.” Not to mention he gets his ass handed to him in a gun-fight with an 80 year-old woman.

So who’s dumber? Who’s the bigger retard? The answer is of course the people who were dumb enough to spend the money to see this piece of shit.

PS: How does one become a zombie?

- “Oh how nice of you to ask. Well, I usually start off by dangling the ol’ worm out there. They fight for a bit, but a… they eventually just lay back and accept it.” (*Kudos)