| | failure and that thing
that gets stuck
in your throat
So the UPCAT results are finally out and yes, I failed. No surprise there. I'm dumb as fuck so yeah.. Whatever. Jay and I are through as well. The sad thing is, I don't feel anything. I just feel numb and empty. Maybe it hasn't sunk into me yet. In a few days, I know I'll be miserable. I'm too tired and hurt to go after the things I want, and the price I'm paying is loss. WTF? It's like I just stood there and watched him walk away. Too tired to explain, too hurt to defend myself. It's not exactly the best timing either. Last night, we had a huge fight, we talked things through earlier, then for some reason we lash out at each other few hours later. Then we just both gave up. Just like that. He told me I couldn't keep my promises, I could have told him I CAN. I FUCKING CAN! but I didn't I just... said, "okay." just okay... It's not okay. Nothing's okay. And if I could travel through time, I'd go back and tell you. I'd tell you I love you and I don't ever want to lose you. I won't make the same mistakes.come over, come over.I'm dying not to hurt you. |
| | Posted 1/13/2008 11:25 PM - 0 comments
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