Hey all 16 days until Christmas! I'm so excited I cannot wait we just got our Christmas tree it is so cute blue and white lights little decorations and tons of presents underneath it. Haha I just got my nephew in a bow tie and my black thong underwear and he was dancing to Dirty by Christina Aguliera it is the funniest thing I've ever seen. I'm horrible poor kid but it was so funny I had to do it. Oye I'm a little screwed up in the head sorry guys. So i've decided not to have sex, and just when it happens it will happen. But it has to be the right guy and the right time. I had to tell off Brandon for a second time so maybe he will stop calling me. How do you make someone trust you who has been screwed over many times. Since I first started dating him all I've tired to do is earn his trust it's been 5 months and I still havent earned it so I give up. He's not the guy for me I guess I just have to keep looking. There is this guy named Luke but we are just dating I don't think n e thing serious will come out of this one, so once again I just have to keep looking. I'm not even sure if I want to settle down I'm only 18. Who knows they say when the right time and right guy comes along you'll know. But until then I'm going to live up the single life. I feel so bad that all of my friends from work that are Mexican don't hve their families here Sommer Wendy and I were talking about it last night and decided to make them feel at home so we're having x-mas at our house and we're going to decorate our house like Mexico and try to make mexican food oye! It will be fun! Well guys gotta go I have to go job hunting!

                     <3 Chrystal Dawn Steinborn

Now there is only 20 days until Christmas yeah!!! Well the apartment is going good it is staying clean finally. Mine and Wendy's room is starting to pull together, we just need stuff to decorate it in (care bears ;) My baby Jordyn (Brandies baby) is doing good he is expected to be coming soon. I'm so excited another kid to spoil. Life is pretty great. I need a little advice though, so if anyone can help me I would appreciate it. There is this guy I'm dating and we have had a couple of close calls to having sex, but I don't want to lose his respect. We are not exclusivly dating eachother, and I've only known him for 5 months. we've been dating for about a month and a half. I'm still a virgin and I don't know if I'm ready to lose my virginity. I'm scared, I mean I've seen it happen all of the time boy meets girl girl looses virginity boy wants nothing to do with the girl. What do you guys think I'm thinking I should wait and build a stable relationship before I have  sex with anybody, but then again I dunno I'm so totally confused. Some advice would help thank you :)

          <3 Chrystal Dawn Steinborn

Now there is only 20 days until Christmas yeah!!! Well the apartment is going good it is staying clean finally. Mine and Wendy's room is starting to pull together, we just need stuff to decorate it in (care bears ;) My baby Jordyn (Brandies baby) is doing good he is expected to be coming soon. I'm so excited another kid to spoil. Life is pretty great. I need a little advice though, so if anyone can help me I would appreciate it. There is this guy I'm dating and we have had a couple of close calls to having sex, but I don't want to lose his respect. We are not exclusivly dating eachother, and I've only known him for 5 months. we've been dating for about a month and a half. I'm still a virgin and I don't know if I'm ready to lose my virginity. I'm scared, I mean I've seen it happen all of the time boy meets girl girl looses virginity boy wants nothing to do with the girl. What do you guys think I'm thinking I should wait and build a stable relationship before I have  sex with anybody, but then again I dunno I'm so totally confused. Some advice would help thank you :)

          <3 Chrystal Dawn Steinborn

Hey All!

It has been awhile since I've written I've been too busy with work. Well things have changed, Wendy and I finally got our apartment it's very cute. Christmas is coming up I'm so excited almost all of my shopping is done I have my mom and dad (Dennis), Tim, and my cousin Shane left. Christmas shopping can be exhausting. Well things have changed in my love life I'm no longer seeing Brandon he came back into my life but I decided he was just too much for me. Everything I did I had to explain, I always had to prove myself to him, because he never trusted me. Without no trust there is no relationship, so we have no relationship. Remind me to never date a guy with baggage. Now I'm seeing a guy named Luke. We are just dating nothing serious it's nice that way no attachments. We just take it day by day, finally I found something that works for me. I heard that John came back I'm so excited to see him but really nervous, so I have yet to call him. I don't know why I'm so scared to see him but I am. I can't wait for him to meet Wendy and I's friends from work. I miss all of my friends from high school I want to go back, but I don't want to do the school work. I really want to go to Tolo but I have no one to go with, I need to find someone, then Wendy can go with Alan, and Sommer can go with her friend Tyler. It would be so much fun. 23 days until Christmas whoo-hoo!!!! I cannot wait I get to be santa clause this year oh yeah!!! Time for me to clean the litter box phew!!!!!! Pinche gatos!!

                                                <3 Chrystal

Hey all Sorry I haven't written in awhile I haven't had internet access. Well let's see I have 4 days until I move out , I'm a little scared but I'm more excited. Finally I have freedom! So things have changed I'm not going to call Brandon anymore I'm going to call him today and tell him that I'm sorry for intruding on his life nad I won't call him anymore cause he's not what I thought he was. I was wrong to go for damaged goods, he told me I was like the rest of his exes cause I was dressed all cute and was going shopping at like 11:00 at night  (spartacus Portland) wioth a friend which was a night we were supposed to hang out. I came back afterwards to hang out with him but he was mad he didn't think I was coming back but I did (right there proves I'm not like his exes). He was upset (mad) and wouldn't talk to me finally the next day he was talking to me and he hugged me and said I'll call you later tonight. Since then things have not been the same, he was taking out stuff on me that his exes did to him. Hello I'm not your ex buddy I'm sorry she hurt you but I don't intend on doing that. Once again never date damaged goods. I feel bad that I wasted his time and mine. I just wished he would get off work so I can call him and let him know I don't like to leave ends hanging ya know. So I guess I'm back to being Chrystal again going from guy to guy every week. I'm kind of tired of being with a different guy every week. That's how I'm known around my family and friends if I had sex I would think I was a slut. I don't know I'm tired of being the heartbreaker, ice queen. I want to know what it's like to be in love and to have your heart broken. Sure it protects my heart but I want to live life to it's fullest have as many life experiences as I can getting your heart broken is one of them. I'm hopeless . Oye well life does go on and until I come to that day I will focus on school, living on my own, and I'm going back to chruch. My dad is trying to have a relationship with me after 18 years of nothing. He gave me money to pay off my credit card and is buying me stuff for my apartment. Then he told me if you have a 4 day weekend I'll come and get you then you can see Grandma and I since we're moving to Yakima. We'll see about that, one thing valuable I learned from my dad is never expect anyhting for if it doesn't happen you'll be dissapointed if you learn not to expect it however when it happens you'll be extatic. Well that's all I have to say for now I'll write later, hopefully I'm goin clubbin tonight!

                               <3 Chrystal Dawn Steinborn