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| It's becoming a daily stuggle now. But it's worth it becuase I know if I'm waiting for someone way out there, that is waiting for me way over here, something so mutual. I know it's worth waiting for, and I know the wait is more than half way over now. It's just been a long time and it is getting to me good or has been lately. Before I fall asleep my final thoughts are about her, and that's neve happened to me before. Usualy lately about how her life up there is going. Who does she talk to? Who is she closer to? Does she like anyone more than a friend? This is our true test. I can't cheat and figure out the answers until the time is up. I don't think we will fail, I have been on good behavior the whole time and I can trust and expect the same out of her. I know it for a fact.
I love you Stephanie Middleton.
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| Famous Question: "How can you wait so long?". I've never really given the true answer.
It's not hard at all. I'm so depressed about not seeing her that I've become numb, I can't feel the pain anymore. Sometimes it rubs off and it hurts like hell, but I am numb. I still miss her, and when she comes back, I won't be numb, and just like anything that comes back from being numb for a long time, it will hurt like crazy for a little bit when she does come back. I thank god that I'm numb, I wouldn't be able to handle the pain. But I don't want to be numb anymore.
And just a hint, it rubbed off a little bit tonight.
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| Stephanie may not have a loving boilogical family, but she has a family down here in Magnolia that loves her like no other.
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| I regret not being as faithful to her and him. I am really thankful for both.
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