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| summer coming to an end T__TIt's been great. Simply great. Although I do dearly miss China, my first in a life time experience of spending summer here in Vegas has been pretty amazing. I'd have to admit that I did not do anything productive for school after the month of June, but too late for any regrets now. After quiting SAT school after June due to financial problems (lol), I began my first job ever in July at Town Square's Kabuki Japanese Restaurant. For my first job, I have to admit that it's quite fun and much to learn. It's quite ironic to find that most of the managers or higher positioned workers are mostly Koreans when it's supposed to be a Japanese restaurant, but I guess it's no surprise if even our CEO guy is Korean. And I guess they figured that I would be Korean as well, which was what everyone thought I was in the beginning by greeting me with "annyung!". Not only Korean, but I was also mislead as a 19+ year old college student when many of the first questions asked were, "So what's your major?" I would usually respond with, "Do I really look that old??" But in the end they'll explain that it's because of how mature I present myself manners wise. Okay. I guess I'll let it slide.
That was basically the month of July. Of course besides working about 4 days a week, I would go out almost everyday and hang out with different people, or try. I've found that it's the best way to relax and really enjoy life, unfortunately now that summer's coming to an end, I'd have to learn how to balance my social life and school.
As August opened the start of the Olympics, I have found something extra to do either in the mornings or the evenings. I LOVE THE OLYMPICS! China has to win! Or...Or... that would probably start me off in a depressing mood for my senior year in high school , which is NOT a good thing. I want to make my last year the most exciting and unforgettable one, which is what everyone wants for themselves as well. Somehow, I'm not really excited for school to start though... hmm. Oh well, the olympics just started on TV, so I'm not really concentrating on what I'm typing right now... So.. I'll just continue on some other day when I am not distracted :) GOOO CHINAAAA!!!! | | |
| 对某些人，或许“忘记”两个字听起来是那么的容易做到。可是当他们将要亲身体验的时候，这两个字变得如火山一般难以翻越。世上有那么多的难题，人生的路还很长，可是却足足比不起爱情的痛苦。 忍不住想要爱你的冲动
不确定你属于我会有点寂寞
你给你幸福在我心中 自由走动
抚平我每一个伤口
忍不住想要吻你的冲动
不确定我的执着能让你感动
我只能相信自己感受 不怕失落
关于你的一切 我想要比谁都懂 | | |
| Recently clinged onto a korean drama called "snow queen". Why is it that there are no love stories like the ones in dramas in real life? | | |
| 亲爱的姐姐转眼的时间你就已经毕业了，怎么那么快啊？
虽然说你还是会留在vegas上UNLV可是却让我有种莫名的告别感，于是让我提起了笔来写下一些想对你说的话。
自从在你的生日party演讲失败，然后又没来得及给你写张卡，我就一直想把不敢当着众人面前的话说给我心中无可取代的你。
宝贝，你是上帝送给我的礼物，是我一个人跟妈妈和妹妹离开远在中国的家人，最孤单的时候的安慰。真的很感谢你在我新生活里面曾添了这么多的光彩。如今，我们的友谊居然维持了6年，依旧未变。 在这段漫长的时间里发生了太多太多令我们难以忘怀的零零碎碎，是我们在彼此的左右才让这些回忆更值得珍惜。
这些你都还记得吗？ ：
-ELL CLASS， P.E., 在我的apartment庆祝雪儿的生日，我骑单车接雪儿然后去你家吃肥肠米线，S.H.E演唱会，周杰伦演唱会，两年的歌唱比赛，SADIES, ALOHA,你的生日，我的生日，你跟SNOOK的偶像剧般的恋情，你对Tiko的激烈追求到现在幸福美满的CANDY&HUGO。。。对我来说，这些都是挥之不去的美好回忆。我们会永远让他们陪伴着我们以后的生活。
今年是最特别令人难忘的，尤其是一开始，仿佛像是CANDY&DENISE友谊复活年，呵呵。虽然我们俩并没有天天见面或聊天，可是我知道我们还是在彼此的生活里有着无可取代的位置。今年真的很快乐，认识了那么多朋友，感觉大家已经成了一家人。虽然有不快乐的时候，像是某些人的离开让我感觉失去了所有，最终你的安慰和大家的关心让我明白谁才是我生命里最重要的，你就是其中一个。
真的要感谢命运让我们相遇。你跟我一样想念中国，所以我们在最需要家人跟朋友的时候满足了彼此两方面的渴望。你真的是一个很好的榜样。在现在冷酷的世界里，你拥有一颗很少见的纯洁跟善良的心。你对每个人都非常的诚恳，没有怨恨，没有抱怨。家里是你一手撑着，虽然偶尔会因压力而崩溃，可你却笑着面对一切，让周围的人感觉到你独立的个性。你的直率更让你远离虚假的人群，所以身边从来不缺朋友，也是我最欣赏你的一点。姐，你跟别人不一样。只有你会为了省油钱而不出门，只有你会跟朋友出去吃饭的时候还不忘家里贪吃的弟弟，也只有你才会为了受害人民伤心到连舞会都不想去。最重要的，只有你才是我最依赖的。
天底下没有不散的宴席，这都是不可避免的，也没有什么不能放手的。但要问我最舍不得的将会是哪场宴席，那就是跟家人的。我的家人里自然就包括了你。不管我们以后身在何处，我们的心永远是连着的。如果真的有一天被分开，请你记住，在远方一直会有个人默默的祝福你，想着你。我相信缘分，相信命运，而既然我们的相遇是被缘分跟命运安排的，我相信我们以后还是会以同一个方式团聚的。
希望你在以后的生活里过得开心跟幸福。假如我要是考到了外省的大学，那也就等于我还有足足一年的时间在你身边。那当然这还是得等我考进了再说，可是现在如果能做好准备那至少接下来的一年会好好的珍稀，也会尽量去增添多一点我们之间的回忆。希望在这接下来的一年内继续持续我们独一无二，如同姐妹般的友谊。
我爱你！永远都会。 | | |
| A lot has happened these past few weeks, the good and the bad ones..
I guess I haven't really stopped for a minute to think and reflect on everything that has happened, it seemed like everything that did happen happened so quickly and was soon forgotten. The pain caused by the memories still linger onto me like a piece of sticky gum that I've accidently stepped into. Trapped. No where to go, but forward.
Since how long ago have I been mentally ill, since how long ago have I been trying to heal the pain by myself? And finally, everything that was once everything is simply let go and dispersed into the air. Everything that was once our everything disappeared. It's hard to accept the truth, for it causes so so much pain for me to handle alone. I have been very strong, indeed, trying everything I could to keep myself together. Sometimes I even imagine myself shouting, yelling, and punching, like a free individual gone insane, but I am still that self-conscious being.
Nothing's ever the same anymore. The beginning of the story was a fairy tale, and as it proceeded, reality cut through. There is no "happily ever after" as I suspected, oh how brave of me to believe that there was a slight chance in proving myself wrong. Despite the nasty things I've heard, I chose to believe in the good. Now that my belief has been betrayed, my innocence is no longer faithful to me, just like you.
The good thing is that I don't have to go through the healing process through school days, now that summer has started. I wish to bathe in the warmth of the sunshine and lose myself in the hours of working, hoping to heal my wound, the wound that you left me. How long will it take to rebuild my trust again? It seems that the immediate exploring and stepping back into the game has not been helpful whatsoever. It frightens me, for my heart has not healed completely yet. Why is it that another person's perfection does not cover even the slightest memories I have for you? As it goes on, I see more and more of our beginning, of the good in you. You were so good to me. You were so perfect. I have let go of you just like that in that instant, but now you're coming back to me piece by piece. No, not you, only your image in my mind. I will only have an empty memory to linger onto and wish for one day to put you, to put us, in the deepest end of my unconscious mind. I am numb, but I believe that I will awake one day to feel the touch of another one. | | |
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