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| There is some sort of insistence; a sensory overload on the word rush.
Urgent, fleeting, definite, confined.
He is there in moments and not one too soon. Daily residing in unmarked cars as a result of memory. Anchoring these reminders as the way his thighs were always so firm.
Exactly when does the voice soften to become more than words? Breathy and visible, they are highlighted by each angle in our motives. We should all be so lucky to line in aluminum foil and heat insulate as a measure to incite self gratification. It is skin on skin temporarily until the fire recedes as much as our intelligence--
Which is limited? Far more feral are the estranged clouding society of immorality. Honestly, I belong to everyone as a surrogate mind to intentionally cause riotous behavior.
--We drink.
--We smoke.
--We light and lie. And who is the giver?
Exceptional concubinery; we fuck each other's hearts regularly in the morning rush to find semi comatose procedures enlightening. To fill a void and be void. Stepping lightly on the concrete structures we 'adamize' and treat like ropes and whips on general phallus.
this is the anger.
He is there, godly
dispensing into latex formality
urgent, undefined shaping the rush to succumb
to willing arms and legs. | | |
| i signed off on morals as of late.
new job, career options, school for make up artist license soon. known people for a year holy shit. can't believe that one. boy is gone. day that happened i met a new boy. then i started talking to my old guy, and then i just met this other new guy. (adorable, 23ish, 6', muscle-y construction worker looking, shy guy) hopefully, tara and i are gonna take another spontaneous late night adventure to northeast philly and go watch the boys play poker at the bar. not too much drama to deal with thank god. learning to keep my verbal giddiness to a minimum, that way i dont tell people things that i shouldnt tell them as my business is none of their business. need a good beating and to find someone who wants to learn fun endeavors.
ps: on another note. I am continuously learning that my former group of friends isn't my style. I just don't think I fit in with the lets play videogames etc group.. maybe maybe not. it sounds super self absorbed and snobby but i'm just not geek material. this has nothing to do with jess or erica or margaux or any of them.. i love all you guys. but your friends etc.. i dont think i fit well with and i'm sure you already knew that.
i love you ketan! keep your grades up hun! hehe so you make more than 80g/yr (because god forbid you ooonly make that much.....  ) and remember law school is almost over. | | |
| "i think i'm paranoid and complicated."
month gone. maybe later.
thinking. bad girl routine. it works for him.
sell it doll. harder. life isnt raw enough.
impassionate boy. | | |
| This is your foolproof method:
play the game with a blindfold?
Let the colors spin out of proportion
controlling liaisons
under bridges but where will clever deceit
ever get you, precious?
If you are going to continue gently fondling
my arms and heart,
please write me to let me know.
I would like to be certain.
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| oh what the hell.
i hate mind games. | | |
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