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Diduntdidunt
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Name: Ghoti
Country: Heard and McDonald Islands
State: Hamburgalers House
Gender: Male
Interests: Everything eastcoast is pretty much a safe bet. Ive got plenty of interests, some im good at, some i suck at, but all are interesting, hence interests. I am a big sucker for fads and impulse purchases and ideas. This could be one of them. See if im still filling this in within the fortnight. ;-)
Expertise: would be nice.
Occupation: Unemployed/Between Jobs
Industry: Nonprofit
Message: message me
Member Since:
3/15/2004
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Be There.
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| Where'd I Go?
Is this thing on?
13 Months later, IM BACK. Took me a while to come up with a good cover story, but I forgot it in the shower earlier, so Ill just lie.
I've been working for the last thirteen months co-writing OJ Simpsons new book.
The plan was simple,
"If people think you killed her, prove them wrong and tell them how you WOULD have done it, and people can see how differently that is to the way it really was."
Books being published next year.
No really.
I didnt write it, but it is actually being published. Thats the only news story ive heard in the last few months which was dumb enough to convince people I was involved in, so Im gonna run with this one, get plenty touchdowns, make the majors etc. etc.
Although this story was horriffic, but kinda funny too....in a very sick way......
First of all, heres some happy chinese people making the most of their dog.
But what you dont know, is that dog is set to be truly merked up in his ends.
Beijing have started a mass cull on dogs over 35cm, or if there is more than one dog in a household. And police authorities are defending their rights to kill the dogs by beating them with sticks.
Im not making either of these up.Absolute boner-fidey truth.
As one thing I've found, you cant look for the best and craziest stories in the Star, or the Sport, unless you want to look for stories about interior decorators who accidentally found a document signed by Pope John Paul II and then flogged it down the pub to a nerd for fifty quid with the banner headline "RESULT!! - MONEY FOR OLD POPE"
You have to go to the Independant. Without doubt the funniest and most sarcastic paper I think I've ever found. You just have to read it to understand where Im coming from.
They are enjoying those dogs arent they?
What you may not have noticed in this picture however is the depressing truth of Beijing at the moment, children are being brought into the police from the age of roughly three years old to start fighting dog hoarding crime. If you look closely at the picture again, you can see the child is actually a police officer.
See I took this picture myself, hence why I can accurately fill in the speech. Ive recently got back off the Bad N3wz "OJ Didnt Do It" World Tour, with our tempoary new singer Jamie Foxx.
Luckily the child, being a child, went for the bribe, put down the gun, and we took the dog to a very kind restaurant who promised to do something nice with him. The child was then ousted from the police for corruption, had his collection of leaves confiscated and has started a cunning consortium bootlegging fendi handbags.
So all worked out in the end.
But I cant be there for all the Chinese dogs, mainly because The N3wz will not be touring with Jamie Foxx again. He has a different work ethic to the bands ancient time honoured traditions.
Previous world tours have just been scams where people buy tickets, we get drunk, dont show up and blame "Irreconcilable Differences" for not performing.
Jamie Foxx is different. Although one thing he did share with members of the band, look at how awkward he is with this honey!
They call that the BAD N3WZ EFFECT.
So theres plenty in the pipeline for Mr Davies, all in all, ive got many a story to tell, but they shall have to wait.
Good days.
Love, Me. xxxxxxxxxxx
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| I Present
Tim Pratt Feat. Stevie J.
"PUMP THAT MADGE"
You are listening to it now, for YOUR aural pleasure. A
full update coming later this evening, get off your chair and boogie
freshmen.
Party. (btw-stevie j's bit doesnt come in until almost at the end, but I think you'll agree its gotta be cameo of the decade)
I'll update later kids.
Love y'all.
Big Dave xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
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| Yo
y'all, you should know by now, I like to pilfer funny things from other
sites, heres something I think has great potential for chuckles within
the WBC. Cant remember who's site I got it off, but thankyou anyhow.
Cheers gun-buddy.
Take
it, and fill it in, ie. change the name as to who you want to write
about. I have decided to give you a Rowdan canvas. I will proceed to
fill it in, after the blank one.
I ______ Rowdan.
I ______ Rowdan because ______.
I've known Rowdan for______.
Rowdan is ______. Rowdan thinks a lot about ______.
Rowdan also thinks a lot about ______.
If I were alone in a room with Rowdan, I would ______.
If I could describe Rowdan in a word, it would be: ______.
I think Rowdan should ______.
Rowdan will never ______.
Rowdan can ______ my ______.
I hope Rowdan never ______.
Rowdan needs ______.
I want to ______ Rowdan.
Rowdan reminds me of ______.
______ reminds me of Rowdan.
Without Rowdan, ______.
Memories of Rowdan are______.
Rowdan can be ______.
The best thing about Rowdan is ______.
Rowdan is good at ______.
I think Rowdan needs to work on ______.
I wish Rowdan ______.
I want Rowdan to ______ me.
I am ______ with Rowdan.
My turn now.----------------------------------------------------------------------------
I have poked Rowdan.
I have poked Rowdan for need of poking.
I've known Rowdan for bare time.
Rowdan is outstanding. Rowdan thinks a lot about outstanding balances.
Rowdan also thinks a lot about boobs.
If I were alone in a room with Rowdan, I would attempt to sort out his finances. Then do impressions of chavs on golfcourses shouting "oh son" toooo tooo much.
If I could describe Rowdan in a word, it would be: son.
I think Rowdan should evaporate. That would be cool.
Rowdan will never evaporate. Understandably.
Rowdan can evaporate? my arse.
I hope Rowdan never evaporates.
Rowdan needs evaporation.
I want to extrapolate Rowdan.
Rowdan reminds me of moisture.
moisture reminds me of Rowdan.
Without Rowdan, moisture.
Memories of Rowdan are all we have, now he evaporated.
Rowdan can be a liquid, or a gas, or a solid, depending on temperature.
The best thing about Rowdan is forgotten. Long ago.
Rowdan is good at breaking cars.
I think Rowdan needs to work on his car.
I wish Rowdan luck, with his car.
I want Rowdan to pay me.
I am not with Rowdan.
Well that was good, until I got Rowdan confused with water halfway through. Still though, it kinda made sense, i need sleep.
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| Well I didnt win the
lottery. Camelot, you made the list. Not the King Arthur Camelot, that
may make the list, its all dependant on my investigation into
freemasonry.
One word.
EUSTACE.
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Hey Party Posse.
Whats goin dowwwwwn yo? Well, what a week this has been, full of
Accountants, wondering, hoping, and in a little way let downs.
It was all building up to friday, where we had a 2 hour meeting with
our new accountant Huw Thomas - "He's not exactly sexy" QUOTE - Mark
Goodwin.
NOT EXACTLY SEXY? ---UNDERSTATEMENT ALERT--- about as exciting as
watching your average accountant painting your average fence, then
watching it dry. Friday was sposed to be one of the most exciting and
scary days of my life, and I almost fell asleep by 10:45am.
Euuurrrghhhh......
So I forget what hes gone to do now, get us some money I think. I think
personally hes gonna bore the Bloke at the Bank of England to death
until he hands him the key to the safe.
Then we were sposed to put in an offer for the premise on friday afternoon, I had my script all planned out.....
"Hi Lisa, how's £130k sound? Do you take cash? Too bad, how about an IOU???"
Well I dunno, It might
have worked. Turned out, she knew we were making an offer on Friday
afternoon, so she took friday off. WTF? I know you cant really use the
term "knob-jockey" to offend a woman usually, but in this case I will.
Knob-Jockey.
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Any wonders as to what a knob-jockey is? Think of Richmond on a horse.
So anyway kids. This weekends been pretty cool, We decided to take it
off, like completely, and out of 48 hours, ive been asleep for 24. IT
HATH ROCKDETH. I have also been listening to some DAMN DAMN DAMN funky
music.
Heres some reccomendations:
Chic - He's The Greatest Dancer. I believe its a biographical song for thommo.
I am GOING TO READ THIS.
Chic - Dance Dance Dance
Cashback, you'll love
this song, its pretty shit, but theres just this completely random
bloke shouting "YOWZAA YOWZAA YOWZAA" in the middle. IT MAKES NO SENSE.
Errr Im sure I listened to something that wasnt Chic this weekend, errrr........
I doubt it. Heres this weeks competition, whats better,
GOOD TIMES - as performed by Chic,
--OR--
RAPPERS DELIGHT - As performed by The Sugarhill Gang.
Yes - that is correct, the N3wz were involved with the gang long before
anyone saw their potential. Once we saw their potential we legged it.
Quick. And hung out with Andrew W.K.
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TIME FOR LAST WEEKS
QUIZ RESULTS.
Gawd, all this Xanga pro stuff is great isnt it, you can be as confusing or gay or i dunno as you like.
So then, Lets see, the equation. AH YES.
Well, Im annoyed Stevie J didnt answer, but Im sure thats coz hes rockin too hard or something.
Lets see, we had a few silly bugger entries, which were rather
entertaining, mainly from Rodin, who claimed that the equation said
something about me doing the daz doorstep challenge, and buying viz.
I think I can do nothing more than shout "shurrup foo" and carry on. Entertaining none-the less, so thanks for the entry.
P33T on the other hand, BLOODY BONER, Remarkably close.
He saw that it was INDEED to do with space,
Oops wrong pic,
SPACE!
Of course it did.
It was actually Eustaces latest girlfriend.
Anyroad, P33T actually identified many of the key aspects of it, it was indeed to do with gravity and that kinda shit.
it was actually an equation proving that Dark Matter, does not exist!
WELL DONE P33T, I give you 7/10 for a damn good effort. Good work.
Bravo- Sun shine lolly pops etc.
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So this week, I also got enough stamps to get my free complimentary
coffee maker at Grosvenor Casino, oh yeah, 17 visits in 40 days. you
know its wise.
Aint she a beaut? Pickin her up on friday.
Rodin bought a new car this week too, off this-a fell-a.
Now I know he looks like your usual used car dealer, but dont you think
if he can afford that, he's a little overpriced? Rodin obviously is not
a bonafide accountant, WHICH IS A BLOODY GOOD THING.
So its a quality motor, you know the usual, the fog lights come on when
you brake and the indicators speed up as you go round a corner, and
sometimes the door doesnt open so he has to go in through the boot. But
this is looking like the best car he's ever had, so well done my old
spice, well done!
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I notice Eid is coming up, which means theres some big party nights
happening soon. Theres a damn huge market for that, so why the hell the
big one is happening at Zync on st mary street, which isnt exactly
huge, is beyond me.
But what did make me laugh, is the main act. His name is Dr Zeus. Now I
know NOTHING about the bangra, bhungra, desi scene, but SURELY isnt
that the guy from Planet of the Apes?
Man am I out of touch, either HES EVOLVED, or I've got it all wrong.
Ooo this guy sounds pretty good too...
But seriously
THIS IS HOW I REMEMBER DR ZEUS.....
Maybe he doesnt know the ch00nz as well as the new guy, but I'd certainly pay more to see him behind the wheels of steel.
If anyone can send me the sample from the simpsons of the dr zeus song. I would be more grateful than rodins mechanic.
Loves yaaaalllllllssssss
Big Dave xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
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