DrMik3y's Xanga

Saturday, January 17, 2004

Sat, 17 Jan 2004 19:18:43 GMT

I'm in a good mood, yet i'm annoyed... weird.

So whatever, I'll get drunk later and the annoyance will go away (i think) then i'll just be ina good mood :)

Saturday, January 10, 2004

Sat, 10 Jan 2004 17:29:22 GMT

Well last night was a bunch of fun :) Shellie, Kate and Steve all came over to hang out... it was really good to see them all. I made them all dinner, alfredo with tomato and mushrooms over fettucine... it turned out fairly well considering I haven't made alfredo in oh... 6 years or so. And holy fuck... Shellie... got.... drunk... xP That was the best, except that she got sick after, but at least that's finally happened for her so she can feel her limit now. Although I have a feeling she's not gonna want to drink for a while, but ah well. And now they are gone and i'm bored and tired once again. I think I'm gonna go to Best Buy later and use my gift card that Shellie got me for christmas :)

I'm too tired to really type anything else... perhaps I'll write again soon, we'll see ^^

Tuesday, January 06, 2004

Tue, 06 Jan 2004 15:52:45 GMT

And I'm back. My goodness I'm really bad at updating this thing. I mean I know I'm lazy but jesus, this is rather ridiculous! Ah well. So I was searching on the net a few minutes ago, looking at journals and whatnot and found this. It's an excerpt from a letter that J.R.R. Tolkien wrote to this son Michael Tolkien in 1941. Apparently there is an entire collection of these letters that Tokien wrote to various correspondents, all put together in a volume which is fairly rare. Anyways, on with the exceprt:

Anyway women are in general much less romantic and more practical [than men]. Don't be misled by the fact that they are more 'sentimental' in words - freer with 'darling', and all that. They do not want a guiding star. They may idealize a plain young man into a hero; but they don't really need any such glamour either to fall in love or to remain in it. If they have any delusion it is that they can 'reform' men. They will take a rotter open-eyed, and even when the delusion of reforming him fails, go on loving him. They are, of course, much more realistic about the sexual relation. Unless perverted by bad contemporary fashions they do not as a rule talk 'bawdy'; not because they are purer than men (they are not) but because they don't find it funny. I have known those who pretended to, but it is a pretence. It may be intriguing, interesting, absorbing (even a great deal too absorbing) to them: but it is just plumb natural, a serious, obvious interest; where is the joke?

I never really thought about that, and the obviousness of that statement is sort of like a kick to the ass. I have continually wondered why it was that girls didn't seem like they were REALLY interested in romance as I had always believed. Perhaps it was blindness that caused me to believe that... that I wanted merely to think that by being nice and affectionate to someone I could win their heart. And perhaps it is Hollywoods fault as well, for making countless movies about romance and how women crave it. Perhaps it is time to stop feeling bitter and jaded about the whole thing with relationships with women and perhaps it is time to wake up. Easier said than done of course.

Wednesday, December 24, 2003

Wed, 24 Dec 2003 17:09:54 GMT

Holy shit an update?! That's right bitches, stop your whining... it's only been a fucking month! (not that anyone is still reading this <.<...>.>)

So anyways, school is done, thank sweet white skinned blue eyed jesus. This semester sucked balls by the way... except for course for shellie and kate who made it a little more tolerable... oh yeah, and steve too ^.~

So speaking of our white skinned blue eyed friend, it's his birthday (even though it's not) tomorrow. Whiche means.... PRESENTS... cause thats what jesus did, he gave everyone presents... he kinda sucked at it though, i mean, fish, water, bread... kinda crappy gifts if you ask me... but it's alright, we'll give him a break seeing as he did spawn the holiday, things always get improved right?

I'm at work now and will be venturing home shortly, weeee... so i'm gonna leave now and actually do some work... so yeah....

Merry Christmas/X-Mas/Crimmus/Hannukah/Kwanzaa/whatever chipmunks, squirrels and ferets celebrate/New Years!!!

(only reason i talk about chipmunks etc is cause there is one very daring motherfucker who keeps leeping like a HUGE distance to the bird feeder, only to keep realizing there is no food in it... how cute)

Monday, November 24, 2003

Mon, 24 Nov 2003 02:48:51 GMT

Bah, so this entry really should be two entries, but I'm a lazy asshole who doesn't update his journal nearly enough. Which would normally be ok, except that I get mad when other people don't update theirs so that I have something to read XP... ah well... here we go.

So lets start with my birthday, like my actual birthday, November 17th. It was ok I guess, wasn't really that much fun though, cause I had to go to work, which turned out ok cause I actually didn't have any work to do, so I basically drove out there for nothing, BUT they had cake for me and Laurie, so it was worth it XP. BUT THEN i had to go to Chinese History and take a fucking quiz that sucked my ass. Plus I actually stayed for the class instead of getting up and leaving like Dan did, bleh. Then I got back home and wanted to hang out with someone, but nobody was around. Kate had left for a concert and Shellie CHOSE FENCING OVER ME!!!!111 like WTF... hehe, juuuust kidding shellie ^_~ I had a good time putting her a on guilt trip for that though, so it's all good. So my actual birthday day, was rather unexciting.

HOWEVER, the rest of the week was pretty fucking great. My birthday turned out to be more like an event than a BirthDAY. Tuesday night Shellie, Kate and I all went out to the Olive Garden, which is like my birthday dinner spot ALL the time. Yeah, we basically rolled out of there, it was great. Although I think Kate sorta hated me for making her buy a dessert, but it was well worth it, cause she left me the rest of the Pumpkin Cheesecake, bwahahaha.

The rest of the week was pretty much me just trying to get through classes so I could get to this weekend. I still hate school, biggety blah!

Which brings us to last night. The Party. I had a great time. There were definitely some bumps and bruises along the way, but all in all it was a really good birthday party. The only thing that kinda made me sad was that not everyone who I wanted to come came. Michelle wasn't there, Aileen couldn't make it, Allison and her roommates never showed up (which I'm hoping was because they decided to just not come and not because they got lost *crosses fingers*) and then of course Gabby, but I haven't heard from her in a while and I should really e-mail her sometime soon and stop being lazy about it.

LOL but ANYWAYS. We got a late start to the party, apparently Jamie thought it was a good idea to stop at the liquor store before the party, I guess I neglected to tell him that I had bought a bunch of alcohol, woops. So they got held up for like 30 minutes and then couldn't even buy anything cause Bethany was with him and she's under 21. So we got up to the lakehouse at around 8:30 or so. They had pizza and beer waiting for me... god I love my friends XP oooo and Jello shots, those were yummy. So we started drinking and hanging out and then Kate realized I didn't have a cake!!! So what happened then? The nicest thing anyone has done for me in a while, lol. Kate, Shellie and Steve MADE me a birthday cake FROM SCRATCH. And then Ben made this kick ass kahlua frosting, HOLY FUCK was it awesome. Girls. made. me. a. cake. AND i have pictures to prove it!!!! Speaking of pictures, I need to go through the disks and check out the pics I took.

So lets see, then there was the presents. I kinda knew what I was getting, but was still surprised and excited that I got them XP. Steve, Steve and Steph got me Viewtiful Joe which fucking kicks ass! And Nick and Casey got me Final Fantasy XI... I am SO not going to get any school work done, damn you guys!

ooooooo and then the karaoke. LOL I don't know why I suck so so much, but I do. Seriously, it takes SO muc coercing to get me to start singing, but once I start I don't stop. I think it's probably because while I love to sing I think my voice sucks ass, and therefore don't want to embarass myself by singing anymore. But ah well, there's an upside to that too, because since I think it sucks I do things like sing with hardcore voice. Nick and I were sitting together and sang Bennie and the Jets. We both didn't really know the song, it sounded vaguely familiar and I know the title so I'm sure I've heard it a few times, but without the lyrics to sing along with it's weird. It was a LOT of fun though XP. 'ba ba ba ba ba ba ba BENNIE AND THE JETS' But bah, I didn't get to sing Truly Madly Deeply, I mean I had the chance to do it, but I didn't cause I was a pussy and wasn't drunk enough. Ah well. And then of course there was Steve with his serenades, lol, what a pimp XP Those were fun to watch though, Shellie got so completely embarassed, it was great! plus I got pictures *snicker*.

OMG and the BEST part of the night. And this may sound weird to some people, but to my friends who know me this is perfectly normal. SHELLIE DRANK WITH ME! That really made me happy, which seems sort of odd I guess, cause it seems more like I'm happy because I was trying to get her drunk, but no, I have no yet come across a person, no matter how much they were against drinking who has had a few drinks and had a bad time. Drinking is fun and if you do it correctly you end up having a good time. And she was a good sport and toasted to my birthday and to our friendship (even though that was just me being evil) but still, it was awesome. Only thing that sucked was that Kate couldn't get ridiculously drunk with me, cause of fencing, but ah well, we all had a good time i think :)

And then the morning. mmmmmmmm the morning. Head hurt. Sun was bright. Ben made food. I felt alright. Haha wow, I didn't mean to turn that into a rhyme, it kinda just happened, haha.... oh boy, i think it's time for bed XP. I feel like I'm leaving certain things about the party out, but my brain is rather fried. Oh, haha, Nick and Patch jumped into the lake naked... that was. interesting. lol Luckily it was in the dark and we didn't have to SEE them do it, haha.

Ok, well I'm off to bed then, THANK YOU EVERYONE for giving me another great birthday, I really appreciate it ^^

Wednesday, November 12, 2003

Wed, 12 Nov 2003 01:52:10 GMT

I have this idea for a really cool drawing in my head, it's the first time I've had an idea to draw something specific and emotional... at least for me. BUT since I can't draw it has to stay locked inside my god damn head.... GKE#()#JE@J@(_TKCLGKNWU($)_FJKL#J: blah.

So I don't know what's wrong with me. I had a fucking awesome day today. Woke up at like 10 and Jay and I cooked tofu scramble and hasbrowns which is always an awesome breakfast. And then I spent the rest of the day with Shellie and Kate. Made good food, watched Life of Brian, listened to them talk about their "awesome" comic (^_~) and just had an all around good time. SO WHY THE FUCK IS IT THAT I'M IN A SHITTY MOOD?!?!?! blah, I don't fucking understand it. I know there is something specific that is bugging me, but it's just the same thing that bugs me all the time so I know it can't, or at least shoudn't, be the reason i'm in a shitty mood.

(I always feel like I should aplogize for having my own little pity party, but you know what i just realized? This is my own fucking journal, I'm not asking people to read it, so fuck it, haha)

So back to feeling sorry for myself... I need this birthday party really badly. I need my friends, just to be able to have them all in the same place at the same time is going to be great... maybe that will help.

I also think part of this whole stupid problem is school. I know I shouldn't complain so much about how it sucks and shit, cause it's partly my fault for not being more hard working. I just have no drive for the whole college thing anymore, I'm just plain sick of it. The only reason I'm still in school is because of the JET program and because I really wanna teach Japanese. I was hanging out with Shellie the other day and this Japanese girl Mayumi came to visit her, to talk and practice her english. We all talked and helped her with certain phrases and meanings and it was sooooo much fun. I usually suck at explaining things, and still do, but I felt like I was making sense to her and not just rambling on. I've never felt comfortable talking to a foreigner because I was always afraid that I wouldn't understand them, and I still am, but sitting there helping someone learn how to speak my language was awesome... and that was the first time I've really ever done it. Although I've also realized my grasp on the technical parts of the english language, suck. I can speak and write the shit fine, but when it comes to explaining WHY things are the way they are, I'm fucked. Or just the terms used to describe everything, or something, I dunno. haha..... aaaaaaaanyways, back onto my rant about school... I'm just sick of the classes I'm taking and of all the work I have to do for things I don't even really want to learn. I know everyone goes through the same shit, and takes classes they don't wanna take, but that doesn't mean I have to be happy about it too. Even the asian studies classes that I'm taking for my major, I don't even have a desire to take them.... Chinese History this year, I'm really not interested in it at all and am simply taking it to fulfill my major... i mean I'm definitely interested in it more than other things, but on the whole I just want to learn about Japan. JAPAN is where I want to spend a chunk of my life. I want to learn all I can about the people, language, history and culture. I need to learn everything that the Japanese learn during their elementary and high school years.... but taking these bullshit classes I'm unable to do that, and that just frustrates me. And I know there are things I could do to fix it, like transfer, but I just don't have the energy to do it again.... to move again, to lose all those credits and just have to take more bullshit courses, and most of all to make friends. It's taken me over a year to finally make some good friends here at UNH, and I don't feel like going through that shit again. Not that the wait wasn't worth it of course ^_~

So blah, I don't even know what's wrong with me anymore, lol.... school, life, relationships, my stupid brain and my stupid emotions... it's all fucked ... but in the immortal words of Monty Python...

"Life's a piece of shit, when you look at it
Life's a laugh and death's a joke, it's true......
YOU'LL SEE IT'S ALL A SHOW, KEEP 'EM LAUGHIN AS YOU GO
Just remember that the last laugh is on you....."

Monday, November 10, 2003

Mon, 10 Nov 2003 15:57:00 GMT

Ooooh an update. I know, when it comes to updating, I suck. But ah well, at least they're good updates right? er, yeah. Anyways.

Got back from Japanese a little while ago, we did our skits today. I think steve, katie and I did ok... our skit was kinda simple and I totally butchered the end joke, but ah well. Luckily we went first though and set the bar nice and low for the class... otherwise we would've had to go after shellie, kate and terri, which would have SUCKED. Those three suck.. and if they're listening... I LOATHE YOU ALL!!!!! Haha. But yeah, their skit was really well done and they all spoke really well AND they used characters from Summer Snow, so I was definitely impressed. Although I still contend that a Summer Snow Sock Puppet Show would've kicked some serious ass, but maybe that's just me *shrug*.

This past weekend was pretty boring. Although friday night was fun, Nick and Casey came to visit me and we ended up getting really stoned. I haven't bought pot in a LONG ass time... probably not since like springfield. The shit I bought for Jay and myself was ridiculous, RIDICULOUS. I was all sorts of fucked up, but it was fun and I had a great time. Other than that the weekend consisted of movies and south park *shrug* I lead SUCH an exciting life XP

My birthday is in exactly one week. 22 is not a very exciting year, but it's still my birthday so I'm looking forward to it. Although I have to take a Chinese Hisotry quiz on it -_- So that kinda sucks, I'll be sitting in class or at work most of my birthday. Ah well, all that really matters is my party on the 22nd, I CAN'T WAIT for that. My birthday is really the only time I can get all of my friends from Connecticut, Northern NH, UNH and Springfield together. Last year was the first time I was really able to do that because of the house and it was awesome, had most of my best friends there... so hopefully everyone shows up this year and then some. Like Aileen, I really hope she makes it, I haven't seen here in probably like over a year :( I really need to get down to CT this winter break. Hopefully I can get in touch with Gabby too, maybe her and Jamie are finally over their differences and can at least share a car ride to come visit me... I can only hope *sigh* And then of course I've got new friends who are coming, but who THINK they aren't going to drink because of a fencing scrimmage, HAH... come to MY party and not drink??? Are they CRAZY?! heh heh ^_~

So lets see, what else is new in my life? Hmmm... my car is hopefully getting fixed today and HOPEFULLY it'll be finished and won't have anything else wrong with it. Almost 800 dollars worth of shit had to be done to it *sigh*. I don't get it, this car couldn't have cost more than 15 grand when it first came out right? So how in gods name can you end up spending 800 bucks on two parts of the car?! I mean jesus, the car is made up of hundreds of parts, that just doesn't make any sense to me.... bickety blah is what I say!

OOOOOOH and Chinese Culture and Civilization is being offered next semester!!!!!!!!! That means that I'll be taking ALL asian study courses next semester... so long as CCC fits in with my schedule *crosses fingers* I think i'm gonna go check that out right now. That'll be SO nice, to have no gen eds and just major courses, weeeee. ^.^,V,, YOSH!

Haha ok I'm gonna go now because I really don't have anything to say anymore... if I think of something else perhaps I'll pop on and update again, only a bit sooner this time *shrug* XP

Friday, October 31, 2003

Fri, 31 Oct 2003 02:55:34 GMT

ok before i start this rant, i need something to put me in a good mood... *thinks*...

ahhhhhh that's better...

so yeah, my car is fucked... well it's not really fucked, but i sure as hell am. $470 to fix the damn thing... i don't have fucking $470... bah. So yeah, that really sucks. But you know what, I'm not even really that mad right now... finding that picture of kyoko was a fucking brilliant idea... i'm all calm and happy now... well sorta... haha...

Anyways, not much else is going on... this halloween looks to be shaping up into a pretty uneventful ocassion *shrug*. I think I'm just gonna hang out and get drunk and watch lots of horror movies... i think that sounds like a fun halloween... hehe

Ichiban and Bberry have their tournament on saturday, i hope they do good! ganbatte kudasai!!!!!! I expect to see lots of bruises on you shellie when you return. And kate... i.... uhhh.... expect to see you return with a trophy! So yeah, good luck ^_~

Ok I can't really think of anything else to say, school sucks, but that's old news, so I think i'm gonna go watch some movies or something... baibai

Sunday, October 26, 2003

Sun, 26 Oct 2003 20:47:14 GMT

(%)#$)_@)$()*$*($%(@#&@$&*#*#()%&*(@^$#()@

FUUUUUUUUUUCK MEEEEEEEEEEEEE

god damnit

and that's all i have to say about that >.<

Sunday, October 26, 2003

Sun, 26 Oct 2003 04:40:26 GMT

SEX APPEAL

What kind of ANIME BOOBS do you have?
brought to you by Quizilla

hahahahhahahahahahahaha good stuff, good stuff so now that i've given you all something to smile about, on with another update.

What is this?! you say? Another update?! Yup.... probably cause i'm bored off my ass right now at my parents house. boooooooooooooooooooooooooooooored like whoa (that ones for you ichiban, hahaha) OH MY GOD I'M FUCKING BORED.... somebody save me... people should not have to suffer boredom like this on a saturday night. I mean jesus christ it's a fucking SATURDAY NIGHT... wtf?!

so anyways, i've gotta buy a new harddrive for my old computer. Cause we're setting it up in the living room. It's got a 40 gig, but I wanna get something a bit bigger. Maybe just get like 120gig and put that in my new computer. . . I AM BRIAN FELLOWES! . . . and then take the 40 gig and throw it in the old computer so i'd have 80 gigs in that...

oh yeah! My mom made me an apple cake!!!!!! totemo ooooooooooooishii desuyo!

and that's it for tonight... love you all! well, most of you at least ^_~