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EmoTioNs
read my profile sign my guestbook Birthday: 6/11/1985 Gender: Female Message: message meEmail: email me Member Since: 11/11/2001

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Wednesday, July 20, 2005

50 Things Girls Wish Guys Knew...

1. dont tell us when you think other girls are hot.
2. whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
3. if you dont act like soap-opera guys, dont expect us to dress like Victoria Secret models.
4. mark anniversaries on a calendar.
5. there is no such thing as too much spooning.
6. we think about you all the time.
7. this is how we see it . . . Don't call = Don't Care.
8. which also means that if we dont call, take the hint.
9. we like you to be a little jealous . . . but overly possessive is not necessary.
10. being able to make us laugh is so much more important than how much you can bench-press.
11. return favors: we massage, you massage; we go down, you go down; we shave, you shave.
12. foreplay is not an option . . . its a prerequisite.
13. we're allowed to be late . . . you are not.
14. eye contact is key.
15. dont take longer to get ready than we do.
16. laugh at our jokes.
17. three words . . . honesty, honesty, honesty.
18. girls can be groupies. guy groupies are stalkers.
19. we never have to wonder if your orgasm was real.
20. do not start with us. you will not win.
21. would you like it if a guy treated your sister that way? we didnt think so.
22. if you ask nicely, we usually answer the same way.
23. we will never have enough clothes or shoes.
24. we have an excuse to act bitchy at least once a month.
25. open the door for us no matter where we are . . . even at our house and getting into the car.
26. we love surprises!
27. we liked to be kissed softly, not with an iron tongue.
28. pay attention to the little things we do, because they mean the most.
29. boxers and maybe boxer briefs sometimes . . . NEVER whitey-tighties!
30. clean your room before we come over.
31. always brush your teeth before you see us . . . a fresh mouth and white teeth are a necessity.
32. when we use our teeth it means that you suck at going down on us, so we are just returning the favor.
33. even though you are sometimes insensitive and hurt us, we still love you with everything we are.
34. don't start fights, it doesn't make you look cool and we're not impressed
35. dont act hard around your friends because i wont make you hard tonight.
36. sometimes "NO!" really means "NO!"
37. "Wife Beaters" are not an adequate form of fashion.
38. if we wanted to be on video tape, we'd be a porn star not your girlfriend.
39. sensitive guys are great . . . but crying more than we do in a movie just isnt right.
40. dont let ex-girlfriends cause drama, relationships are stressful enough.
41. it takes a special kind of stupid to forget birthdays.
42. guys who are good cuddlers = guys who know how to satisfy a woman.
43. "Fat Chicks" have feelings too.
44. silent treatment, shoulder shrugs, tears, yelling and nasty looks all add up to . . . YOU DID SOMETHING WRONG!
45. the excuse "I can't dance" is unacceptable . . . we'll appreciate the simple fact that you're trying.
46. just because a girl doesnt pick up on the first ring doesnt mean shes not waiting by the phone.
47. you dont have to spend a lot, if it means a lot.
48. dont say you love me if you dont mean it.
49. dont lie to us . . . we will catch you.
50. when the girls get together, we talk about EVERYTHING. Meaning my best friends know everything about you

5:52 PM - 8 eprops - 3 comments - email it

Friday, December 10, 2004

Women are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the tree. Most men don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they just take the rotten apples from the ground that aren't as good, but easy.......The apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when in reality, they're amazing. They just have to wait for the right man to come along, the one who's brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree. Now Men.... Men are like a fine wine. They begin as grapes, and it's up to women to stomp the shit out of them until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with.

4:17 PM - 4 eprops - 2 comments - email it

Thursday, November 04, 2004

THINGS GUYS SHOULD KNOW ABOUT GIRLS:
written by a guy. after years of experience.

1. Whatever you do, don't just show up at their house...they run around in their underwear just like we do.

2. DON'T CHEAT ON THEM. It may seem foolproof, but girls tell each other everything about everything. Trust me, they WILL find out and you will be mud.

3. Never miss an opportunity to tell them they're beautiful

4. Don't refuse to kiss in front of your friends. If they laugh at you, it's because they're jealous

5. If they slap you hard, you deserved it.

6. Don't be afraid to touch them if you want to. If they're going out with you in the first place, it's because they like being in your arms.

7. If you don't sleep with them, do not tell your friends that you did.

7.5 If you DO sleep with them, don't tell your friends that you did.

8. You can be dirty minded in private, really...most of them are not offended by it...

9. Not all of them eat like birds, a lot of them can eat like whales.

10. Every girl should eventually get three things from her boyfriend- a stuffed animal, one of his sweatshirts, and a really pretty ring. Even if it's not a serious relationship.

11. Make sure she gets home safely as often as you can. If you're dropping her off, walk her to the door. If you aren't dropping her off, call to be sure she's home safely.

12. If a guy is bothering her, it is your right to beat the shit out of him.

13. If you're talking to a female friend of yours, pull your girlfriend closer.

14. Never, ever slap her, even if it's just in a joking way. Even if she swats you first, and says, "Oh, you're so dumb" or something, never make any gestures back.

15. Go to a chick flick once in a while. She doesn't care whether you enjoy it or not, it just matters that you went.

16. You're dead meat if you can't get along with their pets, parents, and best friends. Be prince charming to their friends, Mr. Polite to their parents, and make sure to be nice to their animals.

17. Don't flirt with their moms...that's just freaky.

18. Don't be freaked out by PMS. It's not gross, and it really does make them feel like shit, so be understanding.

19. If you're officially dating, and you're introducing her to your friends, you'd better damn well introduce her as your girlfriend.

20. Don't stress where you go for every date. They really only want to be with you.

21. If they complain that something hurts, rub it for them without being asked.

22. Girls are fragile. Even if you're play fighting/wrestling, be very gentle.

23. Memorize their god damn birthdays. You forget her birthday and you're basically screwed for life.

24. Don't marinade the cologne, but smell good.

25. After you've been dating for a while, realize that they really have started to trust you. When you have a girlfriend who truly trusts you, you have a lot more responsibility, privilege and control than you would think. Be careful with it, most guys would kill for that kind of power, and it can be lost in a second.

1:08 PM - 10 eprops - 5 comments - email it