I should be doing my AP homework... but I decided that it's time that I abandon this xanga and start new new. I've kept this since 8th grade I think and its time that I go on, move on, write on... just not here.

Goodbye.

Our JPL field trip today was so boring. But I appreciated getting out of class. I mean, I'm truly fascinated by how big and mysterious our galaxy is but... I'm just not into all those technical stuff, you know? Yeah. Well, my body feels extremely weak right now and I don't know why. I woke up from an hour nap and I was just pretty cranky. I'm a little okay right now. Maybe a shower will help. Not much homework today but I still need to cram in the studying for SATIIs on Saturday. Oh dear. Mm what else. I want to go out. Have fun. See a couple people. I think I'd totally be down for the 28th if it happens. I need it! Ahh.

That's all folks.

Me and Gina's late night cut short convo made me realize how much of a complex person I am. Hahaha. No, I've never seen guys as "rocks". But it's true how times like these with all the pressures and focus on school, there's that tendency to long for that someone to just see and talk to at the end of the day. No doubt I've longed for something like that, but logically speaking, how can you? This high school scene is a mess. Gossip and jealousy is inevitable. The youngness of our hearts can beat to this for today, but beat that way for tomorrow. We're spontaneous and contagious. In short, that's basically it. 

Also... I've realized that no matter what, I will constantly push people away when they get too close. I find myself still doing that to the girls even. I love them, but I still push them. No matter how much I want to pull, I always end up pushing.

ON ANOTHER NOTE, I stayed at Borders today. I'm always so greatly amused by the conversations around me. Either the left side of me would be kids my age talking about the usual he said she said or an elderly person just sitting there in peace while reading a novel. And then there's me in the middle straining my eyes as I read page after page for school. I don't know, life just amazes me when it comes to stuff like this.

Though I had quite a Saturday, it's back to the reality of reality. Honestly, I believe that I'm going to breakdown very soon. I don't know how to say what my lungs only restrict.