To you.

Dear person one: You are rude. And pretty assy. And rude. And rude. And rude. And rude. And you think you are better than everyone else. Well, I've got news for you, MISTER, we're all on the same level. I'm no better than you either. So, there's no reason to act like a prick. So glad I never dated you. I hate having people like you be a part of my past. You used to be a great person.... what the hell happened? And, if you just HAPPEN to be mad that night for some other reason... why take it out on me? Seriously... so rude.

Dear person two: You are a liar. You hide. You pretend. You're a pretender. Boy in, family out. Congrats on that.

Dear person three: You're an ass. You also hide behind your pretentious attitude. (This also goes to you, person one.)

Dear person four: I really don't like you anymore. I love how your turned the tables times A MILLION. Girl in, friend out. Nice.

Dear person one: You are still rude.

Dear person two: You are clueless to anyone's feelings REALLY besides your own. Perhaps you're not as nice as everyone thinks you are? Or maybe I'm just not cool enough? ...doubtful.

Dear person five: I'm sure a bath is more important than seeing someone you haven't seen since they threw you an amazing suprise birthday party in February. Yeah. I hope that damned bath was bubbly. So much more enjoyable than I would've been. GAHHHH.

Dear person three: You will probably always be an ass. The good news is, I still like you half of the time. So, even though you piss me off insanely, I still love you. I just wish you'd stop being an ass the other half of the time. I'm sick of your silly questions. I don't mind depth... but, seriously, quit taking it too far. You're just rediculous.

P.S. I don't care who the hell you are. Quit pretending to be my friend if you're just going to be a half-ass-friend. I'm getting so effing sick of, "I really miss you and I want to hang out... I'll call you soon b/c I love you and miss you so much and I want to hang out with your cute self so bad, here's my number... call me soon oh and I'll call you...like... every dayblahblahblahblah..." Yeah... bunch of effing lies.
OH MY GOSH!? You have no gas or money to put into your car? Then stop complaining about how we haven't hung out... because I don't have gas or money either. And, I love you people and all... but, I don't have money to give you to come and visit... OH... and also because I would never want to have to PAY a friend to visit me.... that's just pathetic. Especially if they demanded pay for a visit. REDICULOUS.
HOLY CRAP!? You've been too busy to even send a quick message? Well, then why are there a hundred other messages to other people around here? Yeah, I'm not a freaking idiot. If you don't need me, then, I don't need you. And I certainly don't need this frustration. Don't be a pretend-friend at me to make yourself feel like a nice person. I'm no loser. I've got PLENTLY of friends who care about me and need me. But, I'm done putting forth un-returned efforts. Quit lying to me and quit lying to yourself about who you are inside. I'm so ready to erase you certain people from my life right now. Here's my effing 1,000,000%.

I forgot how much I missed Xanga.

Dear anyone reading this: Sorry you had to read those foul words. But, if I don't get them out here... they will be out somewhere else more public. And not many come by my Xanga anymore. So, here's where I chose for these words to go. And, by the way... I'm working to forgive the above-mentioned people. I just needed an outlet for a bit.

And now I feel alive again!

Finally! Someone to help us!

Things are looking up and the harrassment will be stopping. Hurray!

I've been looking for a job still. Even though I'm still selling Avon. I'm having a hard time getting everything in order.

Being 22 years old and deep (well, deep in MY opinion) in debt is killing my spirit. I'm seriously stuck. I'm waiting on the phone right now trying to get a debt loan. I've tried this before when my credit was better than it is now. And, I didn't get a loan back then. So, I'm thinking I won't get a loan now either.

To top things off... I'm throwing this surprise party for my step-mother and my half-sister. What a bad idea for a poor person. I sure hope this makes them happy, though.

We had kind of started eating out again and going to Wal-Mart again. But, we let ourselves go too much with that. It's time to stop eating out and start eating at home more again. And, no more trips to Wal-Mart. Shopping IS an addiction. I don't care what people say. It's time to cut back again. And, I don't just mean cutting back. I mean stopping completely. In 2006, there were times when we didn't even go to the grocery store because we were saving money. And, we didn't eat some days. If I have to go back to that, I will. I'd rather be able to sleep at night than to be worried about bills.

I had already decided to pay cash for everything from now on. It's just a matter of getting out of credit card debt that's the problem. We waited too long NOT asking for help. So, that's why it's gotten worse. Chad said something VERY true today, "They do everything they can to help you get INTO debt, but, not enough to help you get out of it."

We're pushing through this, though. A lot of couples fight over money. We've realized that there will be good days and bad days, but, money and credit does NOT define who we are as people. So, let's just try to live life happily.

The only reason I'm stressing today is because they're going to take our stuff away if we don't pay them in FULL by tomorrow.

But, we'll get it taken care of. I just needed an outlet. Not many people read this. So, that's good.