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| Thank you... I once said that one's identity is the culmination of every person you've ever met throughout your life, the sum of what you take and what you remove because of the people you meet.
And I stand by that.
It is for one person who became a part of myself for which I write this post.
You've taught me that a wagon ride around the neighborhood is fun, but it's much more fun when the wagon is homemade, as were many of the gifts that you brought for me and my brother to share. Thank you for those gifts, for they gave me the inspiration that love is not something you buy to give, but something you've given, and the tangible is only an extension... a mere fingernail of love, which means more when it is groomed into beauty, rather than purchased and glued and glued on, for a natural beauty surpasses all others.
You've taught me that people can be cared for in a much deeper way than is ever thought possible, because of perseverance. You stayed in my life, and continued, even when I made my biggest mistakes while your council was in front of me... and I ignored it. For that is God's love in you, and God blessed you with it, and you passed it on to me... may I never forget it.
You've taught me that legends are normal men, and the strength they have should be attributed to God's grace.
Yes, that day is fresh forever in my mind, where you, not a very large man, with bare hands in the arid California summer, dragged five square feet of stucco half an acre to a dumpster, and came back vigorously for more. Never quitting, several years later, you built a small shed in the span of three days. I wasn't much help, though I tried. I'm sure you were particular about that shed. Thank you for teaching me diligence.
You taught me about imagination, and though you kept them separate, about aesthetic and practical creation. I hope to keep that spirit of yours alive in myself. I hope to show others what can be done with a little logic, a little ingenuity. I will never forget the bronze cow... I will never forget the cardboard filing system.
You were one of two people who taught me to think for myself. Because of the way you spoke... the way you asked questions. It was never so simple to answer yes or no, and when I answered yes or no, it was because of you that I never felt it was enough. You gave me and my brothers a tape deck when we visited your house several times. It was in your office, and gave us tapes, told us which ones to use. I learned from the fun that we had that freedom of speech is not just about saying what you want, though we did much of it at the time. It's about the ability to speak against an opinion which afflicts, about the ability to say not only "We stand for this. Let us say this." but the ability to say "We shall not stand for this." Thank you for teaching me to think my opinions through, and to separate morals from preference, and to always know the difference.
And you taught me that my gift, though I've let it dull for years, can be sharpened and honed, and that I can tell the world of things they don't see. Of things they don't hear. You taught me that writing is a strong resource to the welfare of mankind, not only for entertainment, but for documenting and spreading words of wisdom, whether they be someone else's, or your own. I hope to continue writing, and you are one person who I can thank for that.
I cannot forget the things you've given me. They will always be a part of me. And even though it's all I have from you, it was always enough, and great beyond compare.
Thank you Grandpa. I love you.
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| The Cliche List.I'm going to try a little something here. Something I think most people will enjoy.
I call it the Cliche List. It will be a simple set up, and if I can ever figure out how to make it work... it will be a constant link on my site where I can add more items to it. Because every day I hear more and more cliches which are thrown around.
To begin with I have two...
A feel good profile quote...
"Live life to the fullest."
Well, ya know... I'd never thought about that... oh, wait... yeah... its called diligence.
Quite possibly the worst attack on self-righteous Christianity by other Christians
"I hate religion."
Really now... well, that's wonderful, I wonder how the non-believers would take that... oh, wait...
***sigh*** now that I got that out... tell me what you think.
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| Updated the look. Maybe it's a little easier to read now? Simple yes or no will do fine. Cause I know it was harder to read the last set up, but... that's just me, I like being hard to read...
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| Don't be color blind. It's a myth. Part 2 (intermission)**edit** I should probably mention I was watching this movie when it hit me to write this all down. It wasn't planned, but it seemed that it would be now the opurtune time to write this expression. **end edit**
This will be the last time I ever write on the subject of color (in this entire essay, paper, article, whatever it should be called. Which means, not just this post, but in the next few parts of it). It will tie in with my stereotype piece, so bare with me. It's a touchy subject, and one that I hate with a passion, but I also have a passion for it. It is a subject that brings me alot of grief, and well, as simple minded as I can be sometimes, and as condescending as I can be, I wanted to attempt to express my true feelings on the subject.
I, personally, hate the cliche "We're all the same." We aren't the same, and we never will be. If the FBI needed an agent, they wouldn't call up the same rosters that the courts would use for jury duty. When considering the next NFL draft (or however it's spelled) the owners don't consider the top college basketball players. If you want to say that people are all worth the same, that's a different story. But we are not the same.
With that said, I will tell you my feelings, first of all, about racism...
And second, why I think it's stupid to fight it...
On racism.
At first, I wanted to go out and beat the members of the KKK. I wanted to line them all up and lynch them, just to give them a taste of what it's like. Honestly, I still believe that their crimes should be punished in likeness. To examine a person by the color of their skin is highly ignorant. To examine the depth of a person, when you only know what the surface looks like, is antithetical. A man is defined by his actions. A man is defined by his tone. A man is defined by the company he keeps. A man is defined not by his shell, but by the values and morals which that shell protects. Many great men are hidden throughout history of different races, different backgrounds, different lifestyles. Many great inventions, philosophies, designs, and art come out of these men. Never once are the latter in anyway indicative of the color of the former.
One of my best friends, a good close friend of mine once conversed with me on the topic. He was a caring friend. He was always there to talk. He was a brilliant thinker, expressive in an incredibly humorous manner.
At one point, after finding out a certain obsession with time pieces I have, he offered me a watch. Thinking this was something he no longer needed, I accepted the offer. Two days later, I received quite an expensive watch, a fossil. It is a gift I will keep for the rest of my life.
He was, as you probably could figure out, black.
This story could quite possibly make me biased. I.E. "The only reason I was his friend was because he gave me a watch." Unfortunately, the watch was given to me right before I left the town I was living in. I left the town after our year long relationship... and I still miss his antics. His attitude. His philosophical pondering (most of which was saturated in humor)
To add to that, in short, I live in a predominately black neighborhood, and I've never felt more at home in my life, save for Lancaster, CA (My home town... haha) I cannot clump any one black man into a group of education, predilection, prefference, or category. Ha! I even got a ride home with a black man that I work with who listens to country music. That is freaking awesome. It's like Shanon (my homeschooled, innocent beautiful girl[dare I say "friend"? yes, I dare!]friend) telling me she liked the Boondock Saints. (One of my favorite movies.)
Here it is. Plain as day...
I disagree with racism not because of the "non acceptance" factor. I believe in a sort of non acceptance. We don't accept criminals on our streets, do we? And personally, I never accept people who live and revel in their faults (If I have to qualify that statement, you aren't reading it. I don't write between the lines, my friend). My problem with racism is the stereotyping of people because of their skin color, as cliche as that sounds.
On the fight...
This is simple. To fight racism... is in essence, fighting yourself back into a war. How can a nation divided be united, if both sides of the division continue to point at it. I know you've heard it before, "If you don't stop picking, it's never going to heal." And yes, I realize the wound... the rift that has driven this nation apart on the platform of racism is huge. But consider it. Which weighs more? The comfort of knowing that there are people out there continuing the fight - settling you back into your home, relaxing because tomorrow the fight will be settled - or the anger which stems from the knowledge such people as the KKK still exist - making you want to grab your torch and storm the proverbial castle to destroy the beast.
Black, White, Hispanic, Asian, it doesn't matter, when a person stands up in indignation for the offense that's being caused, they are inciting unrest. They are inviting more conflict. They are realizing the stereotypes in their own minds, and the minds of those who follow them.
For a positive note, I will leave you with this. It is in my own opinion that the color of ones skin is only a choice of words God uses to write His genetic poem. Don't find somebody else's difference ugly, and don't deny your own.
Find beauty in our differences.
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| If I ever lose my memory...I'll find a note that says "leave the past alone. If Shanon (mispelled Shannon on your phone, so that you don't confuse it with the old number, which you can't delete. Having seen your phone, you should know) you may answer... but her, and your roommates only."
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