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Halo_3
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Name: Jack
Country: Germany
Metro: Frankfurt
Birthday: 4/20/1985
Interests: arcade games, *ahem*, wendy's fries, french bread, Burger King & McDonald's apple pies (sometimes Taco Bell Caramel Apple Empanadas), snapple, "pretty much, yeah," McDonald's Sweet & Sour sauce, chapstick, Family Guy, CSI, passing English, antibiotics, the Spratley Islands, homemade guacamole, oriental flavored ramen noodles, lesbian pornography, biting fingernails, Napoleon Dynamite, yelling at each other even though we're only about five feet apart, Barbeque flavored anything, themed fiestas, "lemonade," Wallace, adderall, Sam's adopted kid that is a girl, procrastination, staplers, being nice to people even though their political views are wrong, NOT Waco water, living on only one dollar, little fat baby stamps, "Sam, are you just looking at things on the desk and saying you love them?" bananas (but not in our hair), being incoherent, the Daily Show, google, ninjas are pretty cool too, stealing food from Penland, Jim Gaffigan, K's Choice, passing chapel and the freshperson 15!
Expertise: eating and sleeping....we're all pretty much the best eaters ever. and sleepers.
Occupation: Unemployed/Between Jobs
Message: message me
Member Since:
4/17/2005
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| alright everybody,
i have absolutely nothing to say, but if i remember correctly, we made a drunken promise to revive this thing.
so happy holidays, and be expecting more frequent updates from the triad of evil in 2006.
ht
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| I was in class today watching this movie about a gorilla named Koko
that can talk in ESL. (i think thats the abbreviation for sign
language.....) Im not entirely sure why, but not five minutes into it i
start crying. And its not a lot of tears but its a few steady ones that
continue falling throughout the whole hour-long movie. Im thinking
maybe it partially has to do with Koko having to live in captivity for
her whole life. it made me sad that she couldn't have some female
companions of her own species because it would make the psychiatrist
less important in Koko's life. And Koko was taken out of captivity, not
given a choice to be in this research project.
Im sure my emotions run farther than this, but so far this is all i
have come up with. Instances like these remind me how little i
understand myself. Which according to Obie would be a good thing.
Shizzle
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| After waiting a week (that felt like a year) for my internet, we
finally got it. now im playing on my new desktop having the time of my
life. It kind of freaks me out to think about how much i use the
internet. how much i RELY on the internet when i am bored. i also have
my cell phone charger. i left it in Kansas and didnt get it in the mail
until yesterday. so now i can call people.
Brooks and i have almost got our apartment together. we should have a partay this weekend or next. soon at least.
i have recently found out that (*edited for content) betrayed halo_3
and got (*edited for content) own xanga. im on my way to read it now,
but that doesn't mean i accept it!!!
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| OK FOLKS, I KNOW THAT YOU HAVE BEEN DYING TO HEAR ABOUT MEXICO - SO HERE GOES.......................
the tale begins with our awesome rafting trip (which i planned, because
i am the shit) near san antonio. after a long day of floating and
drinking, most experts would conclude that i was pretty fucking
wasted. jeff and i kept encouraging each other to go to mexico,
and once we were both on board, we had to rope a few other people along
as well. dave was an obvious choice because of his latin flava'
and his ability to habla espanol, while sam was a second obvious choice
because, well, its pretty easy to convince sam to do stupid
things. after some confusion about who was driving with who ((can
you believe that alcohol had impaired the ability of the baylor debate
team to complete such a simple task??)) we finally got in the car
and ate in a tiny-ass restaurant in the butt-fuck of texas. dave
gave quite the inspirational speech to solidify our drunken decision to
go to mexico. so south we drove.
the next morning, we got some clothes from K-Mart in loredo,
texas. (oh yeah, did i mention that we didn't have even a
complete set of clothes? we had fuckin swimsuits and shorts and a
t-shirt - you could say that we were ill-prepared, but our decision
calculus was pretty skewed and frankly we didn't give a shit,
anyhow.....) and proceeded to cross the border into nuevo loredo,
mexico. the fucking first thing that happened was some fucker
jumped in front of our car and tried to convince us that he was a
mexican official (dressed in gym shorts and a cut-off t-shirt, but hey,
its mexico) and we needed to give him $20 for a "pass" or we wouldn't
be able to get back into the US. dave, being the only fluent
speaker, told the fucker no, but he proceeded to make us offers.
for example, we good be total fucking idiots and drive down "underneath
the bridge to get a pass from his friends" OR we could just give him
the $20 and he would "take care of it for us" OR we could just give him
some money so that he could go buy a pop. hmmm - gracias dave for
speaking spanish.
that day we went and shopped and shit, and checked into "el hotel" - it
was actually a pretty nice place, and it was only $51 US dollars.
we then went to a couple bars and had some corona, tequila shots, and
long island iced-teas. we met some interesting people - like the
guy who approached us and offered to sell us a) cocaina, b) marijuana,
c) heroin, or d) some drug that i'm not even really sure what it
is. the lone cuban man in our party denied him, so he proceeded
to try to make conversation with the two white women of our
party. sam and i just put blank stares on our faces and shrugged
our shoulders the whole time, and dave told the man that we spoke
french. the drug-dealer then realized "oh, i don't speak french"
and walked off. thanks for saving us again, dave. then
there was the all-american-douche-bag who approached us to inform us
that "we don't have to give money to all of those people" - uh, thanks,
doucher, we might be american, but we're from WACO FUCKING TEXAS.
we know all about this shit. he was looking for "the in" (in the
words of jeff and dave) but he was DENIED by our party. there was
also the guy who dave told we were missionaries, but i'll let el vato
loco tell that story, because i didn't understand most of it, as it was
in spanish.
we then went back to el hotel, and something involving the phrase
"chingate" occured, but i'll let dave tell that story too, because i
didn't understand most of it, as it was in spanish.
ok, i'm sick of typing, and its time to get drunk, so i'll finish the
rest of the story later. sorry this story is kinda lame, i
thought i could make it sound more exciting. anyhow, the fucking
kicker is the BORDER VIOLENCE that occured the very next day.
multiple people were found dead, and there were two separate SHOOT-OUTS
that occured in nuevo loredo, in "which assailants used machine guns, grenades and even a rocket
launcher to attack a home"
http://www.cnn.com/2005/WORLD/americas/07/29/mexico.shootout.ap/index.html
you should check out the link, but the point is, our trip was fuckin DEATH DEFYING and that makes it cool.
we're HARDCORE, and thats all there is to it.
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Some “hardcore” highlights of the 2005 Baylor Debate camp:
(I was going to put them in order of 1-10, but that would be
too much effort)
-
jeff and mcmc got into a rap battle, which (arguably)
jeff won – I think the line that sealed the victory was something like “your
girl ***, look like ***, she’s a cum-cleana’” – I’m not going to put all the
details, because that would probably get people in trouble
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frosh puking episodes – examples include: scheller’s “running puke” (great control,
very hardcore), rooney’s “bucket episode” (way to grab the closest receptacle,
definitely makes it easier to clean up – this episode also goes along with the
memorable “fuck ***!” I can’t remember what the word was though, but I think it
was just the name of the bucket or something), amanda’s
“calmly-puking-behind-the-couch episode” (and she then demanded another shot,
very hardcore), the “mystery puker” (scheller or rooney, one of you needs to
confess – who was it that stuck an entire roll of paper towels down oie’s
toilet?), and puddin’s “almost-vomitted-in-my-mouth-at-cici’s-pizza episode”
(this certainly isn’t the same
circumstances as the other vomiting episodes, but it still counts)
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speaking of puddin’ almost puking in his mouth at
cici’s pizza – the EATING CONTEST was very hardcore – at cici’s pizza, hobo ate
23 slices of pizza (and a brownie) to defeat puddin’, who ate 22 pieces of
pizza (and a brownie) – for some pictures of this event, visit swenson’s blog (http://jeremyswenson.blogspot.com/)
(sorry Swenson I hope you don’t mind – don’t worry, nobody reads this shit
anyway)
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rooney fucking pissed on mcmc!! According to mcmc, rooney just fucking stood
up, and started to piss all over terri’s futon (which mcmc was sleeping on) –
can we say “golden shower??” you sick
motherfuckers……….
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Jeff and fred beat team oBie in beer pong – I guess the
old men used their 60+ combined years of drinking experience to show the young’ens
how its done – in the words of oie, team oBie “got powned”
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“since you’ve been gone” – Kelly Clarkson continues to
fucking rock, enough said
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The “puppy” and “doggette” speeches (some better than
others, but whatever)
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The six hardcore frosh put out a 260+ page file in less
than three days – granted this is “hardcore” in a non-drunken sense, but its
very hardcore
Hmm, sam and I had come up with a lot more on our way home
from MEXICO,
but I can’t remember them at the moment.
News about our AWESOME TRIP TO MEXICO is yet to come.
Baylor debate fucking rocks, I can’t wait til school starts
so we can all be hardcore again soon.
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