she has an opinion. she wants to be heard. shell do anything to get her voice out. you better watch out though. because she hasn't figured out just how far shed go yet. when she does though, trust me, she's going places

 

so much is happening in this life of mine;; i don't remember when or where it began anymore..

 

when she smiles, it isn't real. she tries to make people happy, but hardly succeeds. she hurts herself with her self esteem, or in most cases, lack thereof. she's a sad girl. she cries every day. she has trouble talking in front of a class, but displays great leadership skills. she's great with people she knows well, and people she doesn't know at all. but the people in that middle range make her pretty much queasy. she doesn't like to know she's getting a surprise, but she loves surprises. she likes to surprise her friends and other people she loves. some of her teachers like her, others don't. her coaches love her, but she cant bring it out of her to love herself. she can make anyone laugh, but she hardly ever cracks a smile. criticism hurts her unduly. she's scared of success, scared of love, scared of living. she spends her time daydreaming. she wishes she was beautiful and thin. she wants to die more than she wants to live. she doesn't trust many people. not even herself. she thinks she knows what love is. she knows she never did in the past. she likes to snuggle, way more than having sex. she likes to kiss her friends on the forehead when they're upset. she's a good friend. she always puts her friends first. but she hasn't always been that way. she used to be selfish. that was the eye opener of what she wants. she wants to die. she wants to live. and as scared as she is, she doesn't wanna miss a thing in between.

 

 

try to smile every now and then. you're gorgeous, sad, but gorgeous.. faking happy eventually leads to being truly happy, even if its only for a moment

 

 

You know when your heart hurts...But it's a good kind of hurt...You love and care about someone so much that it just hurts to be away from them for any amount of time.

 

This isn't about me trying to make you feel guilty for not loving me...this is about you not being able to see that I feel like dieing because you don't.

 

I hate holding you and crying because I know eventually Im going to have to let you go.

 

 

Stop acting like if you walked out of my life today that I would just be able to pick up the pieces and go on with my life. Stop acting like you dont know you have total and absolute control over my heart. And most of all, stop acting like your oblivious to the fact that from the day we laid eyes on each other we both knew nothing would ever be the same again.