| | Did you miss me? Here's the rundown on the last few months.
- We went through a couple of artificial inseminations with no positive results. My body never even really responded the way the body ideally does before the insemination even took place. We were unpleasantly surprised to discover that our insurance didn't cover them or anything more serious than them so we ended up with a few hefty bills we weren't planning for on top of all the on-going frustration and sadness. To go on to more serious treatments would require thousands - potentionally tens of thousands - of dollars so we had to make a choice. Do we pursue treatment OR do we move ahead with adoption? Because if we pursued treatment and it doesn't work - and the odds weren't great, especially the first time out - there's no way we'd be able to afford adoption. (Those of you who can just get pregnant and let the insurance company pick up the tab have no idea how lucky you are.) So we're adopting and I have to say, it was the shortest infertility related conversation we've had during this whole process. It was basically, "This is hard and I'm really unhappy." "Then let's not do it anymore." There are certainly things about not having a biological child that disappoint us but I think it's more than safe to say that we're currently the happiest we've been about this situation in geez, three years or so. Infertility sucks and unless you've been through it, you have no idea how draining and difficult it is physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually and the second we decided to put it all aside, I felt so much better about everything. In the end we just want to be parents, you know?
- Still working the two jobs. It stinks, but it is accomplishing what it was supposed to which is the paying off of our credit card debt. We were at a standstill for a couple months when most of my extra pay was going to various medical places, but we're back on track and only a month or so off our original goal which was January. I keep hoping I'll get to cash out some Buffalo Sabres, but evidently I live in the wrong area of town. I did cash out Jim Lorenz, the Sabres color commentator, and Marshawn Lynch, the Bills number one draft pick this year. Lorenz was quiet but pleasant and Lynch was awesome. I really only knew who he was because I had to ID him and even though I didn't acknowlege in any way that I knew who he was, he was super friendly and talkative. Also very polite.
- The Teacher From Hell who I worked with this past year put in her resignation toward the end of the year, saying, "I just don't think this job is for me. I'm not sure I'm very good at it." Yeah, you were terrible at it, thanks for that. One of the other aides in our program who just finished her teaching degree took over for summer school and while it's only been one week, the change is unbelievable. The kids aren't entirely happy - they've gone from a teacher who was a wishy-washy pushover who would give them anything if they complained loud and long enough to someone who says what she means and then sticks by it – but there are already signs of them coming around and they do like Lea so that situation has remarkably improved.
- That said, I'm really feeling burned out big time. This year was a killer with me basicailly doing the work of two people trying extra hard to keep the kids in some semblance of a routine. I was hoping maybe two weeks off and a new teacher would help my frame of mind, but while there are little pockets of positivity, I'm really not enjoying the job on any consistent basis and haven't for a long time. Some of it was the teacher but there are also issues with the direction the agency is going and the severity of the kids we've been getting along with the never-ending conflict between classroom staff and those who don't work in the classrooms (administrators, counselors). I'm feeling like it might be time to move on although I have been saying that for a couple of years now and here I am still.
All right, I gotta run. I'm trying desperately to finish re-reading Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince before the last Harry Potter book comes out on Saturday. Just wanted everyone to know that I am still alive.
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| | Posted 7/15/2007 6:23 PM - 20 views - 1 comments
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