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SubscriptionsSites I Read
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| 1836: Texas becomes independent country.
1836: Hundreds of people die in a fire in St. Petersburg, Russia.
Coincidence? | | |
| Customer: "I'm going to report you to the Better Business Bureau, and some other agency I can't remember the name of right now!"
Me: "ok"
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| To get into my bank account online, I now have to enter:
-My password
-My eight-digit PIN
-Three security questions
So maybe I am crazy, but now I finally have that warm, fuzzy, safe security blanket that I never had as a child. So this is what true happiness feels like.
(and yes, I'm serious. If it were up to me, I'd have to enter three passwords and two pins and have a retina scan) | | |
| I haven't been sick in over a year. Not even a little sniffle or cough. The reason for this, I am convinced, is... caffeine. This theory is largely based on empirical data and wishful thinking on my part, but nonetheless I am convinced that if I take massive amounts of caffeine when I feel a cold or something coming on, I will not get sick.
On Thursday, I had a bit of a sore throat. On Friday, I actually had a cold. I spent most of Saturday trying to justify my theory, which I've been rather smugly telling everyone at work about, with the fact that I was undeniably sick.
But then it hit me: my theory is still true! Caffeine does keep me from getting sick. I didn't have a cold, I had Ebola or Hantavirus. So I choose to believe that I am right, and that if I were a normal person, I would probably be dead now.
You see, I am an optimist. | | |
| On Monday morning, my desk is very clean. When I leave for the weekend on Friday afternoon, I clear off all of my papers and sticky notes, and so forth, then I dust it and water the two plants sitting on my desk. I keep track of things with yellow post-it notes. I stick them all over the top of my desk to remind me what I'm supposed to be doing. When I finish something, I pull the note off of my desk, crush it, then toss it in my trash. Unless it has something I consider relatively important written on it, then I run it through my shredder. Mostly because I like shredding paper. | | |
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