Hiromitsu's Xanga

Sunday, August 10, 2008

Sun, 10 Aug 2008 04:29:03 GMT

This week I made a interesting discovery about myself . . . I'm not that old. (And no, I didn't make that discovery by examining my drivers license, in case you were wondering.) The events that led up this enlightenment were not that simply spelled out, whacking me over the head with brutal honesty. Rather, the particular occurrences blended in with the natural dilly dallies of a normal day, and only upon later reflection did their true meanings slowly dawn upon me.

To illustrate, the first reason why I happened to stumble upon this internal revelation was because this past week coincided with the 24th birthday of my wife, Kayo. Though a usually happy occurrence in the past, this birthday seemed to be greeted with noticeably less enthusiasm than a few previous ones, such as her 18th or 21st. Her weeping and moaning made me realize that I, a youngster at the tender age of 23, had a lot to do before my youth fled from my ownership, dashing off giggling further into the distance as my feeble legs move slower and slower from life's grand marathon.

My second realization occurred at the setting of the Ohio State Fair. A grand, week-long event, attractions varied from parades, contests of livestock, horrifically greasy-yet-good-tasting food and amusement rides. It was on one of those fair rides that I later found myself on, as a result of Kayo's pleading, strapped in cage, being flipped and flung about into the air. The ride's metallic arms and Earth's gravity each were in a heated contest with the other to see how many of riders they could induce to vomit. While being mercilessly tossed around in my little deathtrap, I realized my guts was not the only thing to be flying around in my cage. Somehow managing to escape my pocket, my cell phone was smashing around the cage, threatening to brain all its occupants. Quick thinking managed to trap it against the floor with my feet, but another few minutes of the cage spinning ruthlessly about caused it to escape and fling through the bars onto the pavement, 20 feet below. The remainder of the ride I mourned, occasionally managing to catch a glimpse of my poor gadget, laying in a couple pieces down below.

As the ride came to a stop and I searched to gather my cell phone's remains, I was amazed. Though beat up, only the battery had fallen off and when it was placed back together, the phone turned on. I later realized that this was by no means a small occurrence. This was the stuff of legend. Years down the road, when I turn 24 and my hair turns grey, when I collect my retirement check and my grandchildren sit on my knee, I will wistfully recount the good old days when cell phones were made tough and durable, not like the fancy schmancy delicate junk that they will making later. I will sigh and say "oh, those were the days when I was young. I lived them out to the fullest and I am glad."

Saturday, May 17, 2008

Sat, 17 May 2008 01:45:33 GMT

Recently, I've been writing articles for three of Ohio State's school papers, The Lantern, UWeekly and Fisher INK. I'm so happy because it's something I've been wanting to do for a long time and I'm glad I can find people willing to listen to me rant. It's like a form of psychiatry, only I've got thousands of people ready to listen and sincerely nod their head as they wonder when I'll finish talking.

Below is something I put together after interviewing John Lipsteuer what he thought of OSU's plan on requiring their sophomores to live on campus instead of their own apartments. I had to make significant changes so this version didn't get printed.

WILL YOU MARRY ME?

(One Student's Response To New Plan To Make Sophmores Campus-Bound)

"Are you serious?!" This was the first reaction John Lipstreuer had when he
first heard of the possible new rule of sophomores being required to live in
dorms. "I mean, I think it's a good idea for freshmen to get the college experience
of dorm life. Where else can you experience sharing a room with 3 strangers,
bonding as only people who hear each other snore and pass gas every night
can bond? But another year here . . . damn."
Apparently, the relative high cost wasn't much of an issue. As John pointed out,
while he would be paying around $330 for a larger apartment off-campus with
only one roommate, it is almost exactly what he is paying now to live in a dorm
a lot closer to campus. But, “I was really looking forward to having my own place
for the first time.”
Then John was told about the three exceptions that would allow sophomores to
live outside the dorms. Either live with his family, get married, or somehow gain
a serious physical disability. After some serious thinking he crossed off getting
injured. John commented, “wow, so if they pass this requirement, I’m going to
have to find a girl. I know you hear women are demanding and a lot of work, but
you should see my roommates. One of them has this pile of junk about waist-high,
with papers still stacked from orientation, useless foam cup holders and about
everything else a bum would normally through away. A wife would clean all that
up wouldn’t she? Do you know anyone?”

Wednesday, January 09, 2008

Wed, 09 Jan 2008 23:07:19 GMT

It's been a while since I last wrote down anything. Some new things have happened since the last time I was here. My family went to France, Kayo and I went to New Jersey, school started again, and Kayo is moving to her own apartment.

(<--- not really my picture )

It's funny when I tell people this, because their first assumption is that Kayo and I had a "falling out" in our relationship, she needs to take a "break", AND that it is probably my fault.

Concerned Individual: Hiro, it's going that bad huh?

I protest: No! It's not like that! She has to be closer to school . . . that's all.

Concerned Individual: *nods* of course. I see . . . but there's this good book I would like you to read . . .

But besides not buying her flowers for over three years, and her discovering all her Christmas presents before I even bought them, I think we're doing pretty fine as a couple. Uh, right sweatheart?

Anyway, on a different topic, I made an interesting discovery today. I arrived late to my Communication class because the COTA buses had changed their schedules without telling me. 10 minutes late and not wanting everyone to stare at me as I straggled into class and think how fat I looked, I was forced to sit somewhere in the back of the classroom instead of the usual front.

So there I was, taking out my notebook trying to hear my professor when I made a breakthrough scientific discovery. A new species, previously unkown to the scientific community of the civilization of Hiromitsu, was sitting right next to me. They were a type of college students I had never really met before. I shall call them Homo Schola de Higha Schoolio in the genus category of Collegentia. For those of you who can't understand Latin, it means: college students that act like they're in high school.

Experts from the civilization of Hiromitsu say the family group Collegentia usually is fairly serious when it comes to studying, especially the ones previously encountered in habitats known as classrooms. But these newly observed female specimens showed unusual behaviors such as chatting back and forth as the professor lectured, sketching in their notebooks, texting on their phones, etc. It was noticed that they were deeply involved in a sort of mating ritual, writing down names of potential mates, the # of offspring, places to make their nest, sort of occupation, etc. and then systematically crossing them off to arrive at some sort of conclusion.

Though rumors of such species existed, the sheer disregard for their natural surroundings might shock even the most experienced observer. This calls forth the question whether this evolutionary trait will soon be weeded out through natural selection as their natural predators, scientifically known as Mid-Termia, begin their regular hunting season in a few weeks.

If you have come into contact with this species, please let me know. And take the proper safety precautions. Like play dead.

Friday, November 09, 2007

Fri, 09 Nov 2007 18:51:05 GMT

Gorillas and Basketball. You know, it's funny how you can make comparisons between things that might seem completely unrelated, but yet have elements in common. Like my anthropology class and playing basketball at the gym.

I just took my midterm in anthropology (the study of human evolution) this afternoon, and a big focus was on primates. One of the people we learned about was Diane Fossey, a scientist who mixed in and got accepted by a gorilla troop. An amazing women, almost everything we know about gorillas we learned from her. Imagine going into a jungle all alone, introducing yourself to a wild, completely different species, and succussfully modifying your behavior so that they accepted you? Even though I don't know exactly how she felt when she first approached those huge, 400 pound beasts, but I felt I could relate to her when I visted the basketball court later on that afternoon.

I know most people won't be able to relate. I'm also kinda worried I'm scheduling myself for a beat down after comparing gym dudes to a gorilla troop. (But c'mon, I'm sure we all like to flex our muscles sometimes right?)

But personally, when I step onto the court with all these big dudes, I sometimes feel like an outsider, a nerd and a jock wannabe. Call it my razor sharp observation skills or my cunning deduction capabilities, but when I get kicked off teams even when we win, or when I get picked last or not at all, I start getting suspicious that others see me the same way.

Tired of being an outcast, my next thought was naturally, "What would Diane Fossey do?"

So I sat down and started to watch from the sidelines. What makes me stick out? Is it my glasses? Am I not wearing the swishy shorts like everyone else on the court? Or do I just plain suck?

After watching people play for a while, I guess I realized that yes, I do kinda suck. But not by a whole lot. People were missing layups, shots were airballed from the three point line, and yet . . . they didn't project that loser aura that I did when I missed a shot. Is it some sort of animal instinct to puff up your chest and pretend you're all bad so that other people don't walk all over you? Even though it's not really me, do I have to put on a face of complete self confidence and mimick the tough guy personas just so I can play?

I guess so.

So instead of waiting to be picked for the team to play the next game, I decided to pick out the guys who were going to play with me. Instead of sighing and apologizing to the team when I missed a shot, I shrugged if off and tried to get it back. And finally, after changing my attitude and behavior, I could at last say I didn't feel looked at as an outsider.

I know many people will just think I'm silly, but I still feel like Napolean Dynamite would after whooping Summer Wheatly's boyfriend Don in tetherball. Even though we didn't win both games, I still felt a lot more accomplished then after any win from before.

But please, gorilla dudes, don't beat me up.

Saturday, October 20, 2007

Sat, 20 Oct 2007 15:18:10 GMT

I never liked Jane Austen.

You know, the female auther who wrote such mega chick flicks such as Pride and Prejudice and Sense and Sensibility. It's pretty incredible how many fans she has out there. Not only are there like FIVE remakes of the movie Pride and Prejudice, but there are also fan movies that came out like Becoming Jane (about a supposed romance in her life) and the Jane Austen Book Club.

One reason why I don't like her stories is the nature of the society that she writes about. Basically in those types of social circles, a young women's main goal in life is to marry that "perfect guy" (a guy with a lot of money). Why learn to play an instrument? To get attractive wife points. Why stay indoors on sunny days so your skin stays chalky white? To get attractive wife points. Why even be alive? Because being dead makes you lose all your attractive wife points. Even Elizabeth, the supposedly rebelious main character, falls in love with a guy who also just happens to be very rich.

But to be honest though, the other reason why I don't like her work is that it reminds me of the nature of the society that I live in. Being at Ohio State and attending student meetings on resumes, interviews and internships I realize how much we have in common with the young women going crazy when a gentleman caller visits.

To hear people speak, it seems as if their main goal in life is to get that "perfect job" (a job that pays a lot of money). Why dress nice? Get you some good job points.Why get good grades in school? Gets you some resume points. Why join clubs and become the President? Why study abroad? Very good resume points.

I somehow don't like to think of my life as a mission of making myself look pretty for the job interviewer. There has to be more to my life than that right?! That goes for you too you crazy Jane Austen fanatics. Wake up, Darcy is FICTION! Even if he wasn't, he'd be dead for 200 years!

Jane Austen fan: "Well, look who's talking Mr. Star Wars fan! At least we believe in something like love, even though its only for rich men!"

Me: "I believe in the timeless battle of good and evil."

Jane Austen fan: "Well, at least we don't dress up in silly costumes and pretend we're something we're not!"

Me: "Don't you wear makeup?"

Jane Austen fan: *pause* "ok, touche."

Oh well, maybe that's why I studying to be in Human Resources.

Monday, September 10, 2007

Mon, 10 Sep 2007 01:37:47 GMT

Me: Honey, I think we need a new car.

Kayo: Huh? What's wrong with the one we have?

Me: I'm getting tired of the Rav4. Besides, I'll be going to be going to a new school, so I'm thinking I need some new wheels to go along with my new outfit, my new bling bling, and my new dental floss. You dig?

Kayo: Sweetheart, I love you, but you ain't got no style, you ain't got no bling bling, and you sure as heck ain't getting a new car!

Me: But Pumpkin . . . what if I let you pick out the names for two of our future kids?

Kayo: Ok fine, but tell everyone that the reason why we're getting it is because we need something with low miles and has better gas mileage to save gas on my 3 hour commute to school.

So we got the Scion xd last week.

This is a picture of it when I accidentally drove it to the top of a building that had no exits. Silly me, I should have seen all the signs warning NO OUTLET and DEAD END AHEAD. Now it's stuck.

Me: KayoCupcake, can I have another one?

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Wed, 15 Aug 2007 02:53:59 GMT

Every year, more than 2 million Americans die.

So far, about 3,019 soldiers died in the Iraq war since it started in 2003.

Does anyone see what I'm seeing?

Here we are, sending young men in the prime of their youth, to fight against those who terrorize innocent people. These young men (and women) are probably extremely talented and have a whole life to look forward to. They have lots of loved ones at home who don't want to lose a family member or friend. How can we, as civilized people, in good conscience send such people overseas and have their lives abrubtly cut short, when we have more than 2 million people back here who are going to die anyway?

So what I propose is that we organize a new fighting unit, a new branch of the military!

They shall be the elite, the most feared group of warriors since the Strom Troopers! The ranks will be filled volunteers of just a percentage of those 2 million who are going to die this year anyway. Some may choose to instead of dieing slowly in a bed, attracting only pity and sad looks, they will be the elite defenders of justice and freedom, their bravery immortalized in song for generations to come!

Sure there are a few who don't know they're going to die and a few who are simply not able to fight, but for those who are, they will be unstoppable. What is more scary to a suicide bombers than other people who are willing to go through radiation and chemotherapy? What can a rebel with an AK-47 do against nursing home armed with RPGs and M-16s? For those who are going to die this year, nothing an enemy can throw at them will make them flinch in their steely resolve. Indeed their name, the Death Squad, will strike fear in all who stand against it!

Join me as I petition our lawmakers for this worthwhile cause! Send faxes, emails, phone calls, anything to save the lives of your young people!

Join me to put up recruiting posters and recruiting officers to all our nursing homes and hospitals!

Together, we can win this war on terror!

Monday, July 16, 2007

Mon, 16 Jul 2007 03:09:25 GMT

Before you say anything, I want to admit that yes, I do realize that when I write something, it's usually because I am upset by something I read in the news and feel the need to spill my self righteous guts for the entire world (or more likely, a few people) to read about.

"So what is it this time," you may be now wondering, "that has gotten Hiromitsu up in a huff?" Is it the ACLU again with incessant support for the pedophile organization and their work to legalize child pornography? Or is it because his pet rabbit, Peter, escaped from his cage, probably never to return?

Though both are true, what has actually gotten me to seriously doubt the sanity of some of my liberal minded fellow human beings was reading the article entitled "Sexuality a human right for HIV positive women." http://www.plusnews.org/Report.aspx?ReportId=73133

Just to summarize the article, it is about the discussions and topics covered by the first global conference on women and AIDS. After much thought and deep reflection, the delegates concluded that; women with HIV have a basic human right to have sex. They agreed that women have a fundamental right to "be at peace with their sexuality" in order to "protect their health."

Uh, but they DO realize that someone with HIV is NOT healthy? And that by having sex they are spreading a virus that has been killing millions of people? They at least agree that the person has to warn their partner they have HIV right?

Wrong. Well, IF the woman feels like telling her partner they might die, she can. But "to reveal one's condition should be done voluntarily - because the woman wants to - but not as an obligation." Why should she? The other selfish person might think that they might actually WANT to have a long and healthy life and completely disregard the woman's right to feeling sexually secure.

The delegates at that conference fear that other countries will follow the example of Nimibia (who obviously doesn't care a thing about human rights) that require by law that an HIV positive person inform their partner of their status. They can even go to jail if they knowingly infect someone with HIV! (I mean, the other person only dies.)

The conference participants demanded they want a realistic way to prevent HIV. None of that ABC garbage (be Abstinent till a lifetime partnership, Be faithful in that relationship, and use Condoms if one partner has HIV.) To quote a director at the conference, "you can throw ABC in the trash, it doesn't work."

Uhhh, you never heard of a small country that starts with a 'U' and ends with 'ganda'?

Sunday, April 29, 2007

Sun, 29 Apr 2007 23:20:39 GMT

All right you guys, Kayo and I made a quick, short video summarizing the activities of the Youth Ministry in Ohio. First of all, though things aren't perfect in the Columbus community and there are still things and relationships that need to be worked on here, it is overall pretty awesome.

Right now is the largest group of college kids we ever had in Ohio. Thanks to all the people who just got off STF and moved up to Columbus, those who just gratuated into college level, and leaders like Rev. Lampson, we are able to do quite a few things here in the Columbus community like BC Bash as a monthly fellowship and guidence for high school students, City Visits as we keep in touch with BCs in other communities in the district, weekly Small Groups to read HDH and share among the college kids, Bi-Weekly Service Projects, etc. (There is also the WAIT team, but it is not considered to be under the Youth Ministry).

Anyway, had to rush and make this video in about 3 days, had problems with the computer constantly crashing, had to almost pull an all-nighter to get it ready for Sunday's Youth Service, but hopefully it gives people some inspiriation and hope. Just follow the link to YouTube and be sure rate it and leave comments!

http://youtube.com/watch?v=rz2JKyQhpGA

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Tue, 10 Apr 2007 21:55:10 GMT

WARNING: The following blog may be offensive to Arabs, Democrats, 12 year old girls and Fujitsu laptops.

My wife has been telling me that I am being too political these days. I would like to defend myself and say that in fact, I am a very consciencious young person who likes to know what's going on in the world, however weird or silly it might be. For example, I read a few months ago that six imams were reported by several air travelers and detained at an airport for acting suspiciously. In fact, they were behaving very similar to the Arabian terrorists that took over the planes on Sept. 11.

Now, these six imams are not only suing the airport, but they are even suing the people who shared their concerns to the airport security. How crazy is that? Fortunately though, some people in Congress are passing a bill that would protect people from being taken to court just because they report something suspicious (as if that was illegal). Naturally, the Democrats are against it.

"Yo! I got a real sharp pencil at check point Alpha - I need backup."

Funny how political correctness works these days. On one hand, a white, 12 year old girl on a cell phone said the word 'bomb' in the airport, such as,

"Hey Ashley, how'd you, like, do on that math test Mrs. Anderson gave us last friday? Well, I BOMBED tha . . . "

And before you can say "cell phone addicts are annoying" she'd be grabbed and escorted down to security office, cell phone still stuck to her ear.

"Yeah, some big guys with guns are taking me to the security office. I dunno, I guess its like the principal's office. I hope I'm not getting, like, KIDNAPPED, you know? and oh my GAWD, did you SEE what Megan wore last Tuesday?! . . .

So if someone can be arrested if you hear them say the word 'bomb', but can't be arrested for acting like they're actually getting ready to hijack the plane (especially if they look Muslim. If they're white, they are so getting tasered.), something has gotta be wrong. I suppose you have to absolutley sure that those wires dangling from under his coat is a bomb and not just a cheap, broken Fujitsu laptop.

Wouldn't it be like playing a giant card game of B.S? To start the game an Arab can walk onto a plane and say "I hate America, I hate George Bush, I love Democrats, and this suspicious lump under my trenchcoat is not a bomb." Now, everyone else can either let it go, hope someone else says B.S. or say B.S. yourself, and get sued your pants off if you're wrong.

12 year old girl: "Oh my GAWD Ashley, did you know what Jennifer said to me? She said, like, Ryan is, like, TOTALLY into me. Now, I'm like, that is TOTAL B.S. . ."

Arab playing Airline B.S.: "HA! She said B.S.! It was just an Fujitsu laptop! You are so sued."

What a great world we live in.