Weblog

Friday, June 06, 2008

Monday, May 05, 2008

  • Three Tournaments Later....

    Hi...

    It's been a while...

    Touche (Santa Rosa)

    • God blessed Tim and I in allowing us to make it to nationals in our duo. (Squee!)
    • Watching the lil Toucheans at their first speech tournament was so fun I love the novices, they're my kiddos =)
    • Swing dancing!!!  
    • Meeting new people by singing broadway musical numbers (great way to make friends!)
    • Cows...^_^ Need I say more?
    • Introducing the 'awkward turtle' to my friends ^_^
    • "You are my sunshine, my only sunshine!"
    • Getting interviewed by the Press Democrat =D Squee!
    • Anthony becoming Ironman. Yay!

      Biola
    • Debating against some super awesome opponents (Jorgen, Ryan, Trevor, Kate, and Chad)
    • Watching LDers band together and help each other out during outrounds. The team spirit was inspiring.
    • Deferring from outrounds = best feeling ever. You get your name announced in breaks, but you don't have to do anything about it 
    • Steven and Teddy qualifying in LD...awesome!!! Even though I am now the only girl on LD team CA...I'm still elated that those two deserving gentlemen got the last two slots.
    • Kate and I trying to get to our round...wow. We're still mad at you, Aaron Krive. ^_^
    • Seeing my old debate partner after nearly two years. Even though we only saw each other for about ten minutes, it was still special =)
    • Finally making people cry in DI...That was a treat after I stopped feeling bad about it ^_^
    • Being 8th in my persuasive finals room...and waiting over an hour with Joseph Mollath in that building for my turn. (Thanks for waiting with me and sharing the iPod ^_^)
    • The tournament that ran four hours late and got out at 1 in the morning...not one any of us are likely to forget...
    • Getting 4th and being one place away in persuasive. I wish it had qualled, but it still felt pretty good...since it was my first platform ^_^
    • "TOHOT...LD must be really fun!"  Wow.
    • Writing stories about extemp carts on the way home...
    • Nic becoming Ironman. Yay!

    CHAT State Championship

    • Fresh Choice on Friday night...good times!
    • I officially nominate the CHAT tournament for most awesome impromptu topics ^_^ I've been waiting years for somebody to do demotivators!! (Apples to Apples cards and 'things mom would say' were clever too...The faces in finals were pretty out there...but I didn't break, so I'm not complaining ^_^)
    • Crocs (AKA "Kate Shoes") = amazing
    • Watching Craig 'beat up' Annabelle.
    • Running down the stairs singing broadway. And thusly making Kate laugh so hard she cried
    • Egyptian war with speechers (namely...Jamie Silva ) = bad if you value your hands.
    • I want to know why there are no Chipotles around here...it's the most amazing Mexican restaurant ever
    • "Yeah..well...he's a good looking pug dog."
    • Being in 'the wings' when they announced that all duo finalists were going to nationals.  Yay for hugs and happy tears and jumping up and down. Even though you guys realize you're doing this...because you get to go to...Alabama....
    • Yes, I was a little disappointed that persuasive and DI didn't make it past semis...but...God is in control, and both of those speeches did a lot better than I expected they would this year. I still consider myself incredibly blessed
    • "You guys are doing a funny piece right?"
      "Yeah"
      "Yeah, I can't see Holly doing something intense..."
      "Yeah...which is probably why my DI didn't make it past semis"
      "You're doing DI?!"  
    • Teddy becoming Ironman. Yay!

    What a fantastic year. I've met so many new and wonderful people and shared a whole lot of great memories with all of them. I think something I've learned in the past month is how much I really do love people. I felt pain when I saw them suffer and felt immense joy as they celebrated their victories. I felt sick when I watched distressed friends miss out on qualifying by one slot at Biola and actually cried tears of happiness when they finally succeeded at CHAT. And this principle hasn't only applied to tournaments...I'm beginning to experience it in all areas of my life that include people.

    So I guess this means I am emotional...

    Drat.

    ^_^

    See you in Alabama

    ~*Hol

     

    (Pictures of the tournaments are on facebook)

     

Saturday, March 15, 2008

  • The Clutch

    So Wednesday was turning out to be a normal Wednesday. It started with fencing (I am working on another college days, but it is hard since my classes are so broken up schedule-wise  making it hard to make a decently lengthed post...but I digress.)

    After fencing was breakfast at my new favorite coffee shop, which was followed by lab time, which was followed by walking from campus to the last debate class of the season

    (Moment of silence)

    Well, it has become somewhat of a routine that after debate I get picked up and taken to my brother's school, where he is then picked up and taken to his piano lesson. During his 45 minute lesson, we can't go home, because we live across town from his teacher, and by the time we'd arrive at home we'd have to turn around and go back. (or at least Dad would, I'd vote to stay home)

    Anyway, my point is, we had 45 minutes to kill and pretty much nothing to kill it with. We bludgeoned a good 5 minutes getting jamba juices, but once that was done, we really didn't know what to do. Somehow, our conversation led to Matt retaking his driving test after he comes home from his big trips (he's leaving this Wednesday for Peru...). I jokingly remarked, "Speaking of which, can we find an abandoned parking lot?"

    "Sure!"

    Heheheheheheheheheee

    As we found a good location, my thoughts echoed "I'm gonna drive a car! This is gonna be fun!"

    I'm pretty sure Dad was thinking "She's gonna drive a car, we're both going to die."

    We arrived at the parking lot, and switched seats. It's quite a powerful feeling to hold that steering wheel and know it that it was connected to neither go kart nor bumper car.

    For some reason, I figured my experience with go karts and bumper cars had prepared me for this moment. I was proud of the fact that rather than ramming my bumper car into the others, I would carefully drive my little car around the circle, careful not to hit anyone, until our time was up. I even got good practice shouting "I HOPE YOU HAVE INSURANCE!!" whenever someone else decided to ram into my car.

    Well...that was different. There was more to driving a car than one pedal to stop and the other to go. I suppose now would be the time to point out that the car I was driving was not only not one of these carnival rides, but was a clutch.

    A clutch.

    This added the confusing element of not only stop and go, but releasing the clutch pedal while pushing the gas, moving the lever thing to make sure it's in the right gear, and hitting both the clutch and the brake to stop, so as not to roll into a wall, pedestrian, or the like.

    Believe me, it's not as easy as it sounds.

    "Ok, Holly. Ease up on the clutch while pushing the gas."

    VROOOOM

    "You're pushing the gas too fast!"

    "AAH!" ::hits brakes::

    "You killed the engine."

    (repeat ten times)

    I did manage to get the car to move forward a little and backward a little. As I was backing into a parking space, I panicked and slammed the brakes. There was something about the car moving that made me panic and slam the brakes.

    "You didn't need to stop. I'd tell you if you were getting too close to the curb."

    When I got home that evening, I began thinking about my experience. Of course, I was still a little "first-drive high"  (if you can call what I did driving) but I also began to see a deeper parallel.

    Like my dad trusted me to not completely destroy his car, has not God entrusted us with some of His most important posessions? He trusts us with relationships, the lives of other people and probably most signficantly, a specific life calling. When we hear our pastors talking about people who listened to the promptings of God, we think "Yeah! I can do that!" but when God sets a task before us, we hit the brakes before even going anywhere. "Uuh, I can't do that. I'll look stupid. I'll fail. I need to stop before I hit the curb."

    But this is just an excuse for our fear. The truth is we can't even see the curb. Too often we stop far before we're supposed to, and we miss the mark completely because of our insecurity. We forget that faith is blind, and God isn't going to lead us into a wall if we follow Him.

    And yet every time we humans fail (or 'kill the engine' so to speak) instead of obliterating us for our uselessness, he gives us another chance...and another...and another...until we finally overcome those obstacles that keep us from moving  forward.

    Hmm..it's ten minutes to midnight.

    Meaning this could be one of those posts that I write on Friday night, reread on Saturday, and think "Huuuh?"

    ^_^ Aaah, the beauty of late night posts.

    Goodnight,

    ~*Hol

     

Friday, February 29, 2008

  • It Must Be A Leap Day Thing...

    Something's wrong with me.

    It seemed as if I was able to find unspeakable joy running around the beach, climbing everything there was to climb: leaving a criss crossed array of footprints on the sand...Yet the greatest part was that there was nobody there. The private beach I visited was accessible by a narrow unguarded path followed by sheer cliff, and only yours truly felt like braving the trail to get to it today. It felt great to be in such place that spoke of God's creation all by myself.  

    All by myself...

    But when there were people around...for instance, in the car on the way to and from the beach, or even just at home, I felt isolated and introverted. Perhaps even a little irritable.

    I felt like I'd failed at something somehow, and didn't want other people around to judge my error. Perhaps I unintentionally hurt someone last week and now I'm feeling the regrets. But why? Perhaps someone thinks I'm obnoxious, naive or irritating...Or is that just my imagination? Maybe it was just an assignment that got in late, and my mother is now mad at me. But...ok...no question there. Most of all, I felt like spirit and soul just dropped dead, and nobody was around to really care. The people I wish to see the most are the people who are furthest away. 

     For pretty much the rest of the day I felt like I had done something unforgivable, but I didn't know what. I felt like someone resented my existence, but I didn't know who. I felt like I had failed...but I didn't know why. The only peace I could find was being alone on a beach where nobody would follow me. Where nobody could follow me. Where I could feel the presence of God in my own private sanctuary. 
    And yet once other people in my life appeared, I suddenly felt alone and unresponsive.

    Weird huh?

    I feel like the social butterfly/comedian/energetic part of me got killed by a guilt and regret of some sort that I can't even explain.

    I feel bad even posting this because I run the risk of some of you hating me for boring you to death.

    See? I think I've gone insane.

    Which is interesting, because I figured insanity felt rather different than this...

    Perhaps it's temporary...

    Prayers would be appreciated anyhow.

    ~*Hol

Monday, February 18, 2008

  • Oh...And Happy Presidents Day.

    100. WHAT’S YOUR PROFILE SONG AND WHY?
    Profile Song? I don’t have me one of those at the moment…

    99. DO YOU HAVE A JOB?
    Yes. I’m a waitress aboard the “Vineyard Dutchman”. 7 months down, 99 years and 5 months to go.

    98. MIDDLE NAME?
    Yes.

    97. DO YOU HAVE A CRUSH ON SOMEONE?
    Nope.

    96. LIED IN THE LAST 24 HRS?
    Don't think so.

    95. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE COLOR?
    Blue

    94. WHERE WAS THE LAST PLACE YOU TOOK A PLANE TO?
    Colorado

    92. WHAT MAKES YOU MAD?
    Stupid people. And Injustice. And stupid people being injust.

    91. WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
    Taller.

    Haha, I know I know. Either doing something along the lines of law/policy or writing, or theater/singing. =P

    In other words..I don't know.

    90. WHAT'S YOUR NAME?
    Holly. (I was wondering when you’d get to that..)

    89. WHO'S YOUR BFF?
    I have many.

    88. DO YOU HAVE A FRIEND OF THE OPPOSITE SEX YOU CAN TALK TO?
    Yes. I can talk to most of them. Considering they all speak English.

    87. DO YOU HAVE ANY SIBLINGS?
    I have one.

    86. WHERE ARE YOU NOW?
    At my desk.

    85. WHAT FUN THING DID YOU DO THIS WEEKEND?
    Duo practice at the Danfords, working on LD with the Ortiz’s and A cappella practice at Mark’s house. In between all those I was getting phone calls from CO and hearing breaks. It was fun ^_^

    86. DID YOU DO ANYTHING TODAY?
    I practiced my persuasive, and posted a blog on xanga. Gasp.

    83. ARE YOU HAPPY?
    Yes, what’s new?

    82. WHAT IS SITTING TO YOUR LEFT RIGHT NOW?
    A parakeet on a perch.

    81. WHERE IS YOUR GRANDPA RIGHT NOW?
    Heaven

    80. DO YOU HAVE ANY KIDS?
    Not biologically. I have students in debate though. And I refer to them as "my kids" on occasion.


    79. HAVE ANY NICKNAMES?
    Hol, Holly by Golly, Hollsters, Oyi, Holly Berry, Hol brain, jelly, hey there stupid, etc.

    78. CLOSEST BLACK OBJECT?
    The keyboard I’m typing on :P

    77. WHAT ARE YOU WEARING RIGHT NOW?
    My “TMM” T-shirt and jammie pants. Haha.

    76. DO YOU LIKE MUSIC?
    Do I like breathing?!

    75. DO YOU SING IN THE SHOWER?
    No, actually. I always get a mouth full of water and shampoo when I try to do that…

    74. DO YOU OWN ANY PETS?
    A parakeet and a rat

    73. WHERE WAS YOUR DEFAULT PIC TAKIN?
    I don’t know, I didn’t take it :P Looks like somewhere snowy.

    72. LAST TIME YOU LISTENED TO COUNTRY MUSIC?
    ::Quickly turns off the new Carrie Underwood album playing on her iTunes::

    Me? Listen to country? Ha! Never!

    71. DO YOU PLAY VIDEO GAMES?
    On rare occasions.

    70. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE CANDY?
    Take 6 is quite good

    Or is it Take 5? One of them is candy, one of them is an a cappella group.

    I like them both anyway =P

    69. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU DROVE?
    I, uh…don’t have my permit yet *cringes*

    68. WHAT CAN YOU HEAR NOW?
    Carrie Underwoods “American Girl” and jackhammers outside.

    Haha..ok, perhaps I should either change the answer to #72 or #96

    67. CAN YOU PLAY AN INSTRUMENT?
    I’m an accomplished kuzooist. I can also play guitar hero.

    As far as instruments I’ve “messed” with… piano, violin, vocals and recorder.

    66. IS THERE A COUNTRY THAT YOU WANT TO GO TO?
    Italy. Spain. Ireland. Africa (yes, I know that’s a continent)

    65. WHOSE YOUR FAVORITE DISNEY PRINCESS?
    Mulan. She’s cool like that.

    64. LAST PERSON TO COMMENT YOU?
    Do you really want me to go back and check?

    63. DO YOU SING?
    DUH.

    62. SCREAMO OR COUNTRY?
    Country…not my favorite, but at least it can still be defined as music.

    61. ROCK OR RAP?
    Rock

    60. DO YOU LIKE CHEESE?
    Yes, it makes me happy.

    59. WHO DID YOU LAST CALL?
    Uuuh I have no idea.

    58. WHO LAST TEXTED YOU?
    One of my debate partners...either Christine or Kat...

    It’s been a few years...

    57. WHAT JEWELERY DO YOU WEAR DAILY?
    Well, I wear my watch pretty much every day.

    56. CAN YOU COOK?
    My brother always takes seconds of my cooking. That indicates yes.

    55. WHAT'S THE WEATHER LIKE?
    Gray today.

    54.WOULD YOU DIE FOR SOMEONE?
    Totally.

    53. CAR?
    Just…a cool looking one…

    52. ARE YOU COLD NOW?
    Kind of.

    51. WHAT DO YOU SMELL?
    Nothing actually

    50. Is ANYTHING BOTHERING YOU RIGHT NOW?
    Perhaps.

    49. SUNBURN OR MOSQUITO BITE?
    You mean which would I prefer? Oh, how quaint. I guess…Sunburn.

    48. WHAT ARE YOU DOING TOMORROW?
    Duo practice. Homework.

    47.What did you eat for breakfast?
    I just threw a bunch of vegetables in a frying pan. I called it “plate ‘o fried vegetables’.

    46. LUNCH?
    That hasn’t happened yet.

    45. DINNER?
    ^^ Please refer to #46, thank you. ^^

    44. ARE YOU SCARED OF ANYTHING?
    Losing people I love, Being alone, inadequacy. (And clowns, talking on the phone, the garbage disposal, crosswalks, puns, and…)

    43. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE FRUIT?
    Blueberries and strawberries =)

    41. DO YOU HAVE AN IPOD?
    Not of my own.

    40. DO YOU USE CHAPSTICK?
    Rarely.

    39. ARE YOU THINKING ABOUT SOMEONE RIGHT NOW?
    Sure.

    38. ARE YOU WEARING NAILPOLISH?
    Yeah.

    37. FAVORITE SMELL?
    Anything you can legally put in an oven, tropical things, and cinnamon.

    35. UNITED STATES OR CANADA?
    US of A.

    33. ARE YOU CRAFTY?
    Well, I never thought so. But some of the pranks I’ve pulled in the past few months have been rather good, I must admit.

    32. JEANS OR SWEATPANTS?
    Jeans

    31. WHAT SHOULD YOU BE DOING?
    Not this.

    30. ARE YOU GONNA DO IT?
    Eventually when I get to #1.

    29. IS YOUR COUCH COMFORTABLE?
    Yes. More comfortable than my bed, I’ve found.

    28. DO YOU OWN BIG SUNGLASSES?
    No. Should I?

    27. HAVE YOU CRIED SO HARD YOU MADE YOURSELF SICK?
    Wow. I don’t think so.

    26. DO YOU LIKE TECHNO?
    Mm, nah.

    25. WHAT MADE YOU SMILE MOST IN THE LAST 48 HRS?

    The pranks I played at work last night with Walter. And my own random thoughts usually make me smile

    24. WHATS YOUR FAVORITE BAND?
    Inner Mission! Casting Crowns.

    23 . WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE NUMBER?
    All numbers are equal to me…

    Which is probably why I’m so bad at math…

    22. WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSEPAD?
    Fingerprints :P

    21. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE SUBJECT?
    Speech/debate, Ballroom dancing and fencing.

    20. WHAT DO YOU GET FROM TACO BELL?
    Food poisoning.

    19. FAVORITE TV SHOWS?
    The Colbert Report.

    18. DO YOU LIKE 80'S MUSIC?
    You’d have to tell me what that includes

    17. WHO ARE YOU MISSING?

    Too many people

    16. WHO IS YOUR HERO?
    Jesus

    And mommy
    15. DO YOU LIKE TO RUN?
    Not all the time.

    14. HOW'S LIFE?
    Great!

    12. BEEN TO LONDON?
    Someday.

    11.CAN YOU LICK YOUR TOE?
    I can. But I choose not to…

    10. HAVE YOU EVER GOTTEN ANYTHING FROM AMAZON.COM?
    Nope.

    9. BEEN TO A COLLEGE?
    Yeah.

    8. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE THING TO DO?
    Make people laugh. Not just chuckle...I mean laugh.

    7. FAVORITE TIME OF DAY?
    Well, that would depend on the day!

    6. SOMEONE EVER LICK YOUR CHEEK?
    Uhm, the rat has.

    5. SEEN ALL THE SPIDER-MAN MOVIES?
    Yup.

    4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SEASON?
    I don’t know. I’m finding this year they’re all very appealing in different ways.

    3. WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO?

    Next tournament, next a cappella practice, nationals, summer, graduating, going to college, getting married, having lots of kids, doing something important with my life, dying and going to heaven.

    2. EVER GOTTEN LOST IN THE DARK?
    I have more of a tendency to get lost in broad daylight.

    1. WHERE IS YOUR NUMBER 1 FRIEND ON MYSPACE?
    Where? What an odd question…

    First of all, I don’t have myspace. Myspace is evil.

    My #1 friend on facebook, however, is my brother

    And he is paint balling with Walter right now.