i'm fucked this time!i'm the most dumbest, stupid, idotic person i've known. i fuck up on alot of things but this time i really took the cake! the one boy that cares so much for me. the one boy who would do just about everything for me i pushed away. i pushed him away for my own selfish, dumb ass needs everytime i get upset, i go over bored long ass lectures, exagerration, and some hurtful words. ya, i'm a LEO, but that doesn't excuse me for anything. ESPECILLY to hurt the ones i love the most you know i thought i would never have this problem you about my anger, but i guess my subcontious is always testing me. and like in real life, I FUCKIN FAIL! what the fuck do i have to complain about? i live a descent life, i got many friends, chris is the nicest boy i ever met plus he loves me, i so far have evrything i want, my mom, and brothers are the best, yet i still love to throw all that goodness away. i dout that chris will ever talk to me again so far it's been my fult mybe i can't hack it? you know hack the pressure, can't comprehend with life i think everyone can read my mind or something I'M FUCKIN STUPID THAT'S ALL! i'm too ignorent to realize mybe people are the way they are 'cuz they have feelings too! but insted of understanding... i push them away, i get mad at them, i call them names, i'm a fuck up. a real true to life FUCK UP! it takes me a good 3 to 4 hour nap to realize everything and once again hate myself for that. i can't just call him up and aplogize this time i can't get away with an "I'm Sorry" too easily did i cry? ya earlyer...but why should i? i's my fult i did all of this i shouldn't feel sorry for myself i know right from wrong or do i? that's the thing..... I DON'T KNOW SHIT!!!! you know people i'm just waisting you're time with my damn problems i'll let you and myself go.... i just want to be paitent but, it's hard when you are mad you know? it's like you end up thinking "Why should i be paitent? he/she's the one that pissed me off!" but little do i know that's what creates a problems.......... good nite everyone i will be seeing you, never! | 
dude ok on june 1st i went to the mall with two people i haven't gone with since 8th grade! and this is how it happened. on thursday i went on my messenger and anthony poped up, he's was one of my good frinds back in 8th grade. and he say's "hey we shold hang out sometimes like old times" and i say "ok how about saturday?" so i call up christan, he's one of my other good friends and ask him if he wants to kick back with me and anthony, because we all used to meet at the mall before. so we meet at 2:30p.m. and you know were doing the whole "hey long time....woe no way?.....oh you for real?....how you been?" kinda thing. and we notice the journey, a girl we known from middle school is standing by herself waiting for someone. her friens obviously didn't show up on time so we ask her if she would like to hang out with us. so were walking around talking laughing and one of her friends show up so she goes and watches a movie while me, christan, and anthony go walking around. as we walk we run into arvin andother dude we know from middle school. so we all kick back and head for the arcade and then out of know where here comes ryan yet another guys we know from middle school. so here we are freaking out on how tall, or different, or how werird everyone got, and we decide hey, why don't we all just hang out. and it turned out to be great. so great that we all swaped numbers and plan on having another mini reunion, only one that's planned because there isn't any chance that would happen again...lol....but ya that is one day i'll never forget. and it's so cool aecause in 8th gread only me, anthony and christan hung out and not ryan and arvin so it was pretty cool to have those guys there it showed we don't hate eachother or anything.
