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ImGonnaMarryNikhki
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Name: Ross
Country: United States
State: Michigan
Metro: Grand Ledge
Birthday: 4/8/1988
Gender: Male
Interests: God, friends, school, saxophone, people, possums, reading, outdoors, biking, walking, driving, running around, nikhki, puzzles, pranking, nintendo, yelling, movies, garage sales, eating out, ipod, computers, talking, sitting, lying, standing, (oh, why not? kneeling) and zebra cakes.
Expertise: entertainment
Occupation: Student
Message: message me
Website: visit my website
AIM:  flossyPB
Member Since:
10/5/2004
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| Warped tour was amazing. Seeing Relient K, Say Anything, The Academy is..., Angels and Airwaves, Gym Class Heroes to name a few was pretty cool. Something about either shaking Tom Delonge's hand or being jam packed like a fucking sardine in a massive crowd of sweaty, rough, and out-of-control people literally five feet from the stage while Gym Class Heroes is blowing your mind made me realize that even though I don't have much, this was totally worth the money.
Enrique and I then headed over to sara's where I decided to get a little out of control. It's 6:30pm and I'm still hungover from last night. I don't think i'll ever drink a fifth and a half of liquor again. I'm actually surprised that I'm still alive.
For the night I plan on hitting the books (biochem exam tues. rarr), chilling, and going to bed early.
OH! btw, I got an acceptance letter today, I'm officially in the Clinical Lab Science Program at MSU! They told me they accept only 12-15 people a semester so i think i did pretty well :)
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| So there's this girl...I really like this girl but yet again I can't decide if she's right for me. I'm way too picky when it comes to this kind of thing. I guess im just so afraid that a relationship that we might have won't work out like relationships i have had and it'll all just be a waste of time. I dated a couple of girls this past year that I quickly backed away from because I started second guessing myself. Thinking, "do I really like this about her? Will this really work out in the long run? what if that happens again??" I know it's stupid to think about that, but i do when it comes to dating. a lot. and it seems to push me away because i over-think everything. It really pisses me off that "one little thing" for them, leaves me continually restless. I hate myself for still holding on to this. why can't I let go? will I ever let go? will I ever reach the point where I just won't care anymore? it's hard to think so. It's hard to date, it's hard to be confidant, it's hard to drive down the road and not worry that i just might see a blue Grand Am with an angel in a box hanging from the review mirror. When I'm stuck here in Grand Ledge where memories flood my head every turn I make, it makes it really easy to become excited to leave home and go back to school.
Do I have a problem?
When I finally gain the confidence i'll call her and ask her on a date. I hope it wont be too late.
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| Monotonyi wouldn't say im depressed because im happy, im just tired of everything right now. i used to have a lot of friends in high school. i was never bored and hardly was an independent person. I was always with someone from 7am to past midnight everyday talking, hanging out, or going on adventures. i was never bored! well i am now. Every single day consists of waking up early, driving 20 minutes in stressful rush hour traffic, working 9 to 5 hardly saying a word, driving home 20 minutes in stressful rush hour traffic, eating a poor excuse for dinner my parents make, spending hours trying to figure out my ridiculous and frustrating biochem homework online, watching non-cable TV with my parents, and going to bed no later than 10:00pm to wake up and do it again throughout all these beautiful days of summer vacation. what a waste! i feel like i hardly have any friends anymore. the few close ones i have left are either busy living exciting lives or live far away.
The other day i said to a lady a work in response to something i heard on the radio, "god, i wish i could stay up until 3am and sleep in til noon!" she almost got mad and said "why would you want to do that? to hang out with friends? is that what your friends do? well that just goes to show who has responsibilities and who doesnt!"
Is this what being an adult feels like? i don't even pay many bills yet. so it gets worse? goddamn it. this sucks. fuck you lady, i dont care if i have "responsibilities", i want to have fun again. or at least feel alive.
and it's not even being bored that im sick of. It's also my attitude towards everything. I hate driving, I hate traffic, I hate the internet, I hate being inside, I hate when my parents talk to me, I hate the food i eat, I hate the dull lights in my house, I hate how loud my parents blare the TV and radio, I hate being bored, I hate all the uncomfortable furniture in my house, I hate my mom keeps asking me if i made my doctors appointments yet, I hate financial aid emails, I hate planning out my future, I hate stupid music on the radio that they play over and over and over and over again, I hate annoying people, I hate stupid people, I hate loud people, I hate people who look like they are having fun because i am not. I am so irritable its not even funny.
when i went on vaca. with sara this weekend. I didnt hate anything. I was with the person i am closest to from 7am to past midnight talking, hanging out, and going on adventures. we cooked good food, didn't think about work, school, or annoying people... we just... chilled. I was never bored.
why can't life be like that.
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| grow up and get over it, please.I hate when people try to make xanga entries that are all undercover trying to send "secret" messages. I hate it even more when people are bad at doing it.
Just because I don't always make a knowledgeable response or always look like I understand what's going on, im not as dumb as most people think.
I usually know what you're talking about and who you are talking about. and guess what? you're right, I don't care.
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| still... why?there are no words, in any language verbal or pictorial, that could ever describe how much i wish this postcard were for me.
Well today is the one year anniversary that IT happened. It's so weird that I'm still thinking about it and how it really does still hurt. I could care less about drew and amanda and I truly never want to see them again but that doesn't mean I don't miss them. I mean, I miss them a lot to tell the truth. I often have trouble falling asleep wondering what it would be like if we were still friends. The stupid shit we used to laugh at. god it was great.
Oh but how times have changed. which is good. I don't care if people judge me for smoking pot, getting trashed 3 nights a week, or having sex lol. I realize now that i cared way to much in high school rather than living my sweet life. as long as my GPA is as good as it is, Im good. I'll be successful.
and these, my friend, are the college years.
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