InWhateverTimeWeHave
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Member Since: 2/19/2006

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Sunday, June 29, 2008

on...trying to be reasonable...

ok I get it. his phone was apparently not working for awhile (and he's too busy to get a replacement). he's busy at work. dammit am I being needy...to want to see my bf more than once every few weeks? I guess there's never an ideal time to be in a relationship. but right now I feel like maybe I should be moving on...it's not like i'm ms. free time either...it's just hard...and why am I being so easily annoyed? am I losing patience for good reason? ARG  I tell you. he's a good catch I tell you...and if I was in his position, I'd have to get my job done, and that would take priority over keeping up with the relationship. so he has his priorities straight I guess. I guess I just want to see him...and I'm also very sleep deprived, which has made me more irritable. ugh. deep breaths...

my mom told me a while back that there's really no sense "working" on a relationship. we all live busy lives...and part of being a relationship is a. making time for each other but also b. respecting the fact that sometimes our mate can't drop everything for you. sigh.

a couple of songs come to mind...we all live such [blank] lives...




Monday, June 02, 2008

finding balance. i really think i am.

 

it's funny how in the moment, things feel like SUCH  a big deal. and then a couple of hours, days, weeks, months,or years...they just don't matter. dancing through life. one of these days i'm going to compile all my thoughts into a book. for myself. i don't think people could read my innermost thoughts and not get scared off by the real person. cause isn't this voyeuristic thing called blogging just a way of getting to people's core? i wish ppl were as honest and open in conversation as they are when they share their thoughts and feelings on the internet. kinda ironic, isn't it. part of maturity = perspective. funny how far i've come.


Sunday, February 03, 2008

I don't wanna grow up, I'm a toys 'r us kid!

So apparently part of growing up is figuring out what you want. Out of life, out of your job, out of your relationships. It's all a bit overwhelming. And another thing...giving yourself alone/personal time, and valuing that as much as you value all the social time with friends, doing fun and wild and crazy things.

Yep, being OK spending time alone with myself. I'm learning...slowly...I guess this takes time.

But to each his own, eh? I guess some people are more the loner type, whereas I'm the socialite.

One of these days I have to take a picture of this outfit I was wearing last night and am going to wear again today. I've been called bizarre, weird, beautiful, and elf, and trendy. Haha. (I got a manicure with bright red nails to match my candy striper type outfit. Hot stuff, yep I know)

Here's a toast to (learning to, at least) not caring what other people think (about my outfit and about me in general), and being a diva (or at least feeling like one for a little bit).

Go Giants! off to a superbowl party in a couple of hours to catch up with some dear friends I haven't seen in awhile~




Friday, December 21, 2007

so I'm curious- do guys still like to be the ones to "chase" the girls? Are guys really attracted to girls who fake helplessness and stupidity? Gimme a freaking break. People have been telling me I'm way too aggressive (with everything, but esp with guy stuff)...that's why I've ruined/prevented so many possible relationships. UGH. why can't I just be my friggin self with him? Why is there this stupid unwritten (LONG) book of rules that I'm sposed to abide by? I mean if I was a guy, I'd like to be called once in awhile. And I really ruining everything by telling him he's awesome, I consider him my boyfriend, that certain songs I hear on the radio remind me of him? If I was a guy, I'd find all that flattering, not intimidating, as if these words were coming from a pushy overagressive Bitch. But yea, that's apparently how I come off. WTF. ugh. Alright fine. I won't have a DTR talk after just 2.5 weeks. (Even though we've seen each other 6x for many hours each time)...calm down? ok I'll try. and relax. and be patient (ha). Well if we're not establishing exclusivity, I'm gonna have me some fun while we're apart this holiday season. SCREW EXCLUSIVITY. haha pardon the pun. so yeah. just needed to rant.

btw happy holidays all.