scared... nervous.  pray for me, college in 3 days, hopefully i see everyone b4 i leave

I don't believe that it's gotta be this way
The worst is the waiting
In this womb I'm suffocating

i just cant wait to brake out, i need to brake out, but i cant yet... but i want to so bad and i almost need to.  but ill suffocate a little longer, 4 or 5 more years longer then everything will either go away or it will be so much bettter or worse but untill that day i shall wait... podering what shall be.. untill that very moment i will never be content, almost lifeless, with a heart so big and a chest so small it hurts to even have my heart beat cause every time i feel it pound i remember everyy time ive ever been hurt, iit felt just as pain full but i also know so much from this and i know soon my chest will break open and i will be able to let my heart be as big as it can be, because i know your there and you wont ever leave... you cant and wont... you love me to much.. even if no one thinks you do, i know deep down you always will because i know i will always too, nomatter where i go.  its just so hard to keep it all inside when i want to let it all out.  but i cant and i wont, ive said enough.  take it as a pleed, a guilty pleed of sorrow and optimism for the future. i know i cant live with out you, with out wanting you there, because you will forever be on my heart.  imprinted forever, eternity. nomatter what happens. thats what ive always said.  im loyal now and i have to keep this promise... i promise i will always be here and i will never hurt you purposly.  mistakes are made but forgiveness is from god and thank god you are here for me. jesus....... <3  ....

Sometimes songs can speek your heart better than you can… and nothing is better than this song.  Past and present its my life, how I feel sometimes….every event yuo go through makes you stronger and who you are, bad and good, it makes you who you are. not only do you have to accept it but so do others, mistakes and all.

I've got some deep scars from a little black heart that's miles away
I sent it packing after I saw what it did and I couldn't believe
And now my chest hurts from the hole that I dug, it's getting harder to breathe
I'm really gasping, wishing I could turn back and that would fix everything
For once...past or present every event makes you stronger and who you are.

My life
I might as well live it
Along with the bad times
Just happy to be living
So it's my time, I know it sounds selfish
I'm really not like that
We live and we die for this

So now my head hurts and it's only getting worse every time that I think
I feel like choking every time I have to sing, it's getting harder for me
And now my stomach hurts, as long as I'm in love it's so hard to leave
I feel a bad pain moving through my chest and my knees start to shake
My knees start to shake, it's bringing me down

This is my life
I might as well live it
Along with the bad times
Just love to be living
So this is my time
I know it sounds selfish
I think I'll have some ice cream
We live and we die for this

There's one thing missing every time I step outside
One thing missing every time I leave and drive
One thing missing every time I'm far from home
There's one thing missing every time I leave for months
One thing missing every time I lose control
There's one thing missing every time that I stay home

I've got some deep scars from a little black heart that only make me stronger
And now I don't sleep, seeing any relief that gives me some perspective

This is my life
I might as well live it
Along with the bad times
Just glad to be living
And this is my time
I might as well share it
I'll give you all my money
We live and we die for this