i typed this up fridaii night, but didn`t get to post it up `til now..

+// the hour is -- 6;19 pm
+// current mindframe -- thingsz could be better..
+// track spinninq -- promise by kai

¬» ihop ? ohana ? one question lingers on all our minds -- what happened to the 11 of us ? what has led to people suddenly leaving this group ? nobody really knows.. it could be lack of communication.. people being stubborn.. people automatically making assumptions.. let mee just say this. we had a little argument over this whole group. what`s in a name exactly ? yes, it`s true that a name makes us unique, but is it necessary to have one ? why do we have to name our friendship ? did we ever have an agreement as to who was in this group ? did anyone ever ask if it was ok for some certain people to be in it ? instead of everyone blaming each other, i think we are all to blame for. is it necessary to call people names ? is it nice to talk about people behind their backs, whether its good or not ? is gossiping ever really good ? why are assumptions being made when you don`t know half the truth ? was there ever trust between the 11 of us ?

how did things ever come to this ? was it because of some people`s immaturity ? was it all because people just flat out forget other people ? was it because people automatically assume they know how one person acts/thinks ?

"some of us think holding on makes us strong, but sometimes it is letting go."
[ excerpt from s0opla ]

did you ever stop and think that yu were close-minded ? as to say, you believe in one certain thing and you think it`s right and nothing else is.. or you close yur mind to new ideas.. new adventures.. new paths for us to take in life ? i believe we all have been close-minded. maybe we have been too dependent on each other. maybe we have thought that no one could ever be in our little group because we haven`t known them that long as much as everyone else. we`re not a club. we`re not anything that excludes other people, but some of yu make it seem that way. "oh let`s kick out this person and replace them with this person." or "no one else can be in our group." you must admit, some of yu have said that. you have all been close-minded to new people, new meanings to life. and i admit, that i have been close-minded. that`s why i`ve been trying to go out and meet new people, new things to experience. i need something new, but not replacing the old. i`ve come to realize that i did need to meet new people after the whole name of "ihop" ending, yet it was the same thing bcus all that was done was us being re-named to "ohana." i guess some things don`t change.. that`s why i have wanted to drift away frum this group.. bcus it had just caused me so much pain built up inside. i have no one to talk to about these situations bcus no one would understand.. i tried to drift away, but i guess i`m still clinging on so strongly. i still get offended if i`m not invited to somewhere or someplace while most of yous are invited. i still feel hurt when people forget about me. i can`t deny that the 11 of you have had an impact on mee. yess, it`s true we`ve had our ups and downs, but now we must see through the dark, cloudy skies and look for the best. even if it means, letting go of 2 people from the group. instead of holding on to something so strongly, you just have to know when to let go bcus it might be for the best.. like yu all said, they`ll still be in yur hearts so it doesnt make a difference. they`ll still be yur friends no matter what, but they just don`t want their friendship to be titled. i do too.. just want to leave the whole name, but it`s hard when yu have 8 other people thinking otherwise. so i`ll leave you with this, when you think something is so small, so tiny and meaningless -- trust me, it may mean a whole lot to someone else.