sigh... rough week........ i need me some red light special action...
What Women Say & What They Really Mean
She tells you she'll accompany you to a dinner party, and she seems to
really want to. Later on, though, she gets angry at you for having made
her go. Sound familiar?
Men and women are very distinct creatures. While men have a tendency to
be straightforward, women are often not so simple. When trying to
understand what she really means, you are sometimes better off reading
between the lines.
But don't get disheartened just yet. The following cheat sheet with
help you bridge the gap between what she means and what she says. From
asking her out to being in a relationship to breaking up, the list
below will equip you with all you need to know to understand what she's
really trying to tell you.
She says: "I don't want to ruin our friendship."
What she means: I am not attracted to you, or I don't feel enough chemistry to date you -- but I do like you as friend.
Why she does this: She probably does want to remain friends, but
doesn't want to hurt your feelings by admitting that she doesn't feel
the same attraction for you.
What you should do: Don't take it personally; she just doesn't
feel the same chemistry as you do. Take the hint and work on being
friends with her, if that's what you want.
She says: "I'm just so busy with work right now."
What she means: I am not interested in fitting you into my schedule.
Why she does this: She wants to let you down easy. Instead of being blunt, she is hoping you'll just get the picture.
What you should do: When a woman likes a man, she will always
find time for him -- no matter what her schedule is like. So don't kid
yourself into thinking that the situation might change. Instead, move
on right away.
She says: "Are you seeing anyone right now?"
What she means: I might like to submit an application for the position of your girlfriend.
Why she does this: She wants to make sure she is not wasting her precious flirting energy on a man who is already spoken for.
What you should do: Answer honestly, and then hit her up for her phone number.
She says: "Do you really want to go to that restaurant/movie/dinner party?"
What she means: I really don't want to go to.
Why she does this: She doesn't want to go, but she doesn't want
to appear stubborn either. She is probably hoping you'll sense her
hesitation and come up with an alternate plan that pleases her.
What you should do: If you have your heart set on going to that
particular destination, stick to your guns. Otherwise, you might want
to switch up in order to please her. Remember this: If you keep her
happy, she'll keep you happy.
She says: "You have a knack for dealing with kids. They really seem to respond to you."
What she means: I am contemplating eventually having children with you and am wondering where you stand in that department.
Why she does this: An indirect question is her way of feeling you out without freaking you out.
What you should do: Don't freak out. She is probably thinking
very distantly into the future (yes, women do this). If, however, you
absolutely positively know that you never want kids, this would be a
good time to say it.
She says: "Where is this relationship going?"
What she means: I would like us to graduate to a more serious, exclusive relationship.
Why she does this: She wants you to be the one to suggest exclusivity.
What you should do: This depends on whether or not you actually
want exclusivity. If so, suggest it. If not, let her know that you care
about her, but are not interested in being exclusive right now.
She says: "I feel so close to you right now. You know me so well."
What she means: I am starting to feel the l-word, but I don't want to be the first to say it.
Why she does this: It's a scary thing to be the first to say "I
love you." It's much easier for her to hint and hope that you'll take
the plunge first.
What you should do: Do not -- under any circumstances -- say the
l-word if you don't mean it. If you do feel it, then go ahead;
otherwise, don't say anything. In the long run, you'll be happy not to
get entangled in such a lie.
She says: "I feel like our relationship is stuck in a routine right now."
What she means: I want you to be more romantic and spontaneous, and surprise me more. I need you to pay more attention to my needs.
Why she does this: She doesn't want to hurt your feelings and admit that you are, in part, the cause of the rut.
What you should do: You don't need to change your personality
entirely, but it wouldn't kill you to surprise her every once in a
while. Call her out of the blue and tell her you're taking her for
dinner, go on a spontaneous weekend away, or just surprise her with her
favorite chocolates.
She says: "A man was flirting with me all night."
What she means: Does it make you jealous?
Why she does this: She wants you to know that she's a hot
commodity and that other men are interested in her. She wants you to
appreciate what you have.
What you should do: Don't respond to it in a way she'll expect,
like by getting angry or jealous. Instead, pay her a compliment --
she's definitely fishing for it. Don't get all insane with jealousy;
just let her know what she means to you, or else she'll be playing this
card every so often to set you straight.
She says: "Do you get along well with your mother?"
What she means: Are you a family man?
Why she does this: A man who gets along with his mother tends to
be more loyal, sensitive and devoted -- at least that's the stereotype
that a lot of women buy into.
What you should do: Talk about how close you and your mother
are; you could even tell a couple of stories. Just enough to affirm
that yes, you get along with her.
She says: "I'm just not ready to make a commitment."
What she means: I'm not ready to commit to you, and may never be.
Why she does this: She uses this tactic to soften the blow; nine times out of 10, this means that she doesn't see a future with you... ever.
What you should do: Don't stick around until she's ready to make a commitment. Chances are, when she's finally ready, it won't be with you.
She says: "I think we should stay friends."
What she means: I am trying to cut you out of my life gradually.
Why she does this: She thinks it would be easier to gradually
stop seeing you instead of going cold turkey. She may even want to keep
you around as a backup.
What you should do: Stay friends
if you like. But don't let yourself become the backup guy. If she wants
to get back together down the line, ask yourself if she's only doing it
because she hasn't found anyone else.
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