It is everywhere
What more can I say?
You've absolutely
Made my day

Traveling from far away
Irvine to Vegas
You flew
All for a surprise

It makes my heart warm
To see a familiar face
Something out of the norm
Making this a better place

Movies, Shopping, Eating
There is not better way
To spend
My Sunday =]

    Quite frankly I don't like getting feet massages. In fact, I use to hatttteeee massages period. However, with age everything changes. Little by little, I feel certain joints in my body cringe. Time to time, pain creeps in and crawls from my lower back up to my shoulder blades. When I shrug my shoulders, I can hear the muffled sound of fragile bones crack. Day by day, I notice a habit beginning to develope. One in which stretching inches its way to becoming a daily routine. Leaning to one side with my legs spread apart, I bend over and slightly pull my leg to one side while in the almost-split position. All the while, tension in my aging muscles loosen and I feel a little bit more flexible.

    I grew up picky. I was the 'princess' who wanted everything my way. Coke and chocolate were my addiction and though I got rid of the soda addiction I still have my chocolate addiction. I guess somethings in 'you' remains the same all your life. Maybe little things in me have remained the same, but its a good thing or how would people define me? Yet I am happy that I am changing. People wait all their lives to get out of their cacoon and flutter into the world...Well i don't exactly like that metaphor since I dislike butterflies. I must admit though that it is quite shocking how much I've grown. Thinking back to my childhood, I have distinct memories of stealing. Yes stealing...can you believe it? I was a sticker theif sad to say. Hopefully none of those poor kids in my chinese kindergarden miss their stickers. Not only was stealing a routine I executed, but fighting with my brothers. Yup. I use to scratch them, bite them, pinch them till they bled, and all sorts of absurd methods to inflict pain I did on them. Well they returned the harsh treatment, so i don't feel that bad about what happened. Our relationship throughout middleschool and highschool continued to become better. Now we have an unseperable bondage created through love.

Your family is your 'team'. They are the ones who look out for you on the field. They are the ones who you're suppose to be able to run to in times of pain and problems. They protect you when you have opponents charging at you. They have your back no matter what.

Ever since childhood, my dad told me these words and how one day I'll come to love my brothers. I guess he was right =). Joe Joe told me that next year will just be a taste of college life and he's right. Just got to stay strong and quit being resistance to drastic changes. I should try getting my foot massaged now and see how I feel about it. I mean the last time I did it, I wiggled around and tried to restrain from squaking at the masseuse.

Who knows what God has in store for me now?

When i think back to almost half a year ago, I realize I made a big mistake. No i take that back not half a year ago; it was winter of 2006 when I made this mistake. It started with me pushing my favorite little one away. I told him to leave me alone because i was being the usual stubborn pompous person I can be at times. Little did I know he was just trying to protect me from someone. Always looking out for me with his eagle eyes. That night he watched me while I made a fool of myself, longing with every breath to save me. Yet obeying my every command to back off. He was right and I was wrong. Many times over the course of this year he's tried to stop me. Shedding tears, fighting with every breath within him to shed some light on my foolishness. Once again, I push him away thinking that I knew better. More than once he beckoned at the door wanting to spend the entire night to help me out of love. The thought of me always pushing him away just breaks my heart. Once more he comes in this time with a plea for honesty. Honesty I neglected to give him. I bite my tongue and decieve him with the words from a serpent. The lies slither out off my tongue while my heart begins to pound faster and faster. The truth was all he craved for- yet i was selfish and kept the shame to my self. How many times haveyou cried in your bed, wishing you could get through to your sister? How many heart aches have you put urself through just to try to protect your sister? How many nights have you stayed up to let the rest of the world know that your sister means so much to you?  How many times have you knocked gently at my door and come in with tears only to hear me say get out!? How many times have i lied to you to hide my shame? How many times did you try to get through to me and failed? I confess that i've lied to you and my heart burns to go back to those days when you'd come into my room and just talk to me. I wish i could go back to those times now and just live it forever, with you coming into my room but instead of me pushing you away i ask you to stay longer because i love to hear you talk. Remember those nights when we'd pray together? I still remember your first major heartbreak and we just prayed and cried together to reassure each other of how much we loved one another. Next year i'm going to need you more than you know. Each tear that falls just makes me think of each individual that i've said goodbye to. I'm not ready to let go of my tears...i'm not ready to be alone. Without you to accommodate me to dinner. Now it'll be a quite house with no one to talk too...where will you be when i need you most. If I say I was sorry would you stay? If I say I was sorry would you let me know that everything will be ok? With every ounce of my heart, I want you to know that I love you and I'm sorry before it is to late and I have to say goodbye.

Can i keep you close forever?