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Name: Shifra
Country: United States
State: New Jersey
Metro: Edison
Gender: Female
Interests: I enjoy being with friends, relaxing by reading a book or watching tv.... I love to sing and shop. I also love meeting people and being able to talk to them comfortably right off the bat..that is cool!!! i enjoy being around others but sometimes need time to myself... I will always remember my great times in NFTY-GER and at Kutz.
Expertise: I am an expert at laughing at almost anything. I have a great sense of humor and am easily amused.
Occupation: Student
Message: message me
Member Since:
4/27/2003
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| Lots of emotions....Ok... so I haven't updated since December... a lot has happened since then. In January I was home for the month. I had brought in the New Year at Liz's house this past year. It was of course a lot of fun. I went to DC to visit Rache with Barak. We had a lot of fun and one of the activities that we did was go to the Madame Toussane's Wax Museum in DC. It was kinda creepy at first but was really cool when I realized that the eyes of the wax beings were not following me.. lol. I'm not sure what else happened during that month....
Spring Semester started at the end of the month. I took 2 graduate classes that were going for my Masters adn my undergraduate credit. They were okay classes. There was a lot of work but most of it was good and interesting. I also had my senior seminar for Religious Studies. That class was interesting to say the least. The topics covered were Christmas, Weddings, Funerals, and Sports. Notice out of all of those how many is actually tied specifically to a religion.. my teacher loves Christmas and must bring it up all the time...I did my big paper in that class on Rituals in the Media. I looked at movies and television shows specific rituals like weddings, having families, fitness, birthday parties, etc. It was a really good paper. I got, I think, an A on it. It was really fun to write. The teacher even gave us "awards" in which I got most improved! lol The last class I took was Yoga:Philosophy and Practice. That means we went over why people do yoga and what thoughts are behind the different kinds of yoga. Every Thursday we did some yoga a well.. let me tell you...NEVER again. For my final grades for the classes I recieved two A-'s and 2 B's. The A-'s were for Sr. Sem and one of my grad classes. That is awesome I think.
Overall I think Spring semester was good. I participated in many Senior nights which were fun nights. Before Spring Break there was a dance in which I went to that with my date from last year. It was fun. The next day Barak came up for the rest of the weekend. We hung out and went to Crystal Cavern in Kutztown and to an amazing Middle Eastern restaurant in West Reading. I went to DC again in April to see Amanda, Alex, and Tomesha. It was fun. We people watched, hung out at restaurants, at Hebrew School, got Benihana (which I've been too... yummy!!!), and more. Passover was of course started at Bubbie's house but there were little kids everywhere! We hadn't had that kind of situation in years! It was a lot of fun. I spent only the beginning of Passover at home, otherwise I was at school and it was not the easiest to do. On the last night of Passover Jess and I were going to a Reading Phillies (minor league) game. It was a lot of fun. I ended Passover at 4:30.... lol because otherwise my dinner would not have been nutritious. The game was fun too and there were fireworks!! In March former President Bill Clinton came to my school to promote Hillary. I missed the NJ primary because I didn't know when it was so I went to this to see what her story was then I would compare it side by side to what Obama is promising. Now that is a moot (hehe a word from Ferrari's class.. Liz) point. Well... the next cool thing after that would be the fact that I have my own apartment in Reading! Well... I share it with my hamster, Sophie! Mom and Dad had come in the beginning of May with sofas, a dining table and other items I had already had waiting then we got a desk, dresser, bed. I had enlisted some boys to help move stuff out of the moving truck and they were speedy workers. Thanks John, Chris, and Mike. Slowly by the end of school all of my stuff was in my apartment. I put together my desk with Jess, my tv carts, got kitchen supplies from Barak and more. Everything is not put away yet because classes and homework have been keeping me busy. So Barak adn the other Ramaponians graduated on May 16th in the rain... lots of rain. But I was happy to be there to see my brother, best friend, and all the others in the group graduate. I took lots of pictures and then had to go home to go back to school for a Senior Week event that night. The family came to Reading the next day to move me out of the dorm... that was fun... not.. it took awhile because I wasn't as packed as I normally was because how hectic and busy Senior Week was. Sorry about that. I graduated the next day, May 18th. I stayed in Reading for an extra night to put away my clothes and such.
I came home that Monday. Mom had surgery on her ankle the next day. She was given general anesthesia and had 2 screws removed from her ankle. She was in pain but her ankle healed quickly. The problem was she was still in pain... not in her ankle though. Something happened in that she was nauseous and could not lay down or sit for periods of time. She would go upstairs to lie down only to come back down stairs because her stomach hurt too much and she wanted to sit downstairs. I watched tv with her, took care of her since dad was at work and Barak had made plans to hang with friends. I ran errands for Mom to get her medication that the doctor said would help her. Don't get me wrong... I was very irritated with this process, it my only break from school until August and I had to take care of mom like she was 5yrs old.
::WARNING VERY SAD PART!!!!!!!! Don't read if you don't want to know all of what occurred with Mom....::
That outlook changed on Friday, May 23rd at around 8:45am when Dad screamed for me to come downstairs to help him. I go downstairs to hear Dad on the phone with 911... Mom was not breathing...... She looked like she decided to take a nap while Dad showered before work... Dad says we need to give CPR... I remember what I was taught in health class. We lift her off the chair and get her on the ground. I tilt her head back but I can't open her lips.. they were stuck shut from her saliva. She was already a little rigid when we moved her but I ignored that because I wanted her to wake up and be okay. I did the chest pumping of CPR and her lungs must have had liquid in there because I thought she was trying to breathe but it was just something in her lung... I called Barak to have him come home right away because he was at a friends house...He got home when EMS was already here..... We went upstairs. One of the police officers that came sounded like Mom so I kept thinking that Mom woke up.... that thought when Dad came upstairs.... he walked into the room and just shook his head... Mom died.... We just burst out in tears... I mean what else can you do.... We comforted each other. Then we were allowed to go downstairs... Mom was there... on the ground... I just kept thinking she would wake up... Barak and I siad our goodbyes to Mom... I told her I loved her even if I didn't say it as much as I should have. I apologized for complaining while she was in pain during the week.... I just wanted her back... I love and miss her... Dad called Bubbie, Rache, and Aunt Shelly first... I called Liz. Thank gd Edison was off for an extended Memorial Day wknd. She and her mom came right over. Bubbie sped down. Lynn, Phil, and Erica came over... It was Erica's birthday.. not a great bday anymore... my mom was like a second adoptive mom for Erica (and for the rest of my friends).... so it was like loosing their mother. Bubbie got down to the house in an hrs time adn sped into the complex.. the neighbors came over to see what was wrong because we were outside so that no one would have to see Mom if they did not want to. Everyone who wanted to said their last goodbyes to Mom before the funeral home came and took her away.... I went in I think another 2 times before they took her away... After Mom was taken away Bubbie decided that we needed to clean house like crazy... Here is the bad part... we normally clean before Bubbie comes over, since we obviously didn't plan this the house was worse than ever. I kept being asked where stuff was when I'm never home if anyone should know where any cleaning supplies or anything was it would be Barak... he's home more often and has been the maid over the last couple summers... I just tried to stay away from anything... I couldn't clean I was still too shocked and wanted to mourn.... Over the morning we called more people and told them what happened and some came over. When it was time we went to the funeral home to make the arrangements. We did that... realizing now she was buried without her glasses.... idk if she would need them but I wish she was buried in them... or at least had them in the casket... Liz's family hosted dinner for us that night with help from the Lampfs and Minucci's.
That night it was hard to sleep.... it is still sometimes hard to sleep... I know that will happen and it will get "easier" or "better." Whatever I know why I'm loosing sleep when I do.. I'm thinking of Mom and that is okay.. I cry and that is okay.. the next couple of days went by fast. Saturday was spent with more cleaning and I went shopping for clothes for the funeral because all of my nice clothes were at school. Barak found a gift cheque for $60 for LB so it was ironic that Mom was still paying for clothes.. Shopping was hard for me. Not because of what it was for.. ok maybe a lil for that... but because shopping that Mom and I could do with each other and not fight a lot. It finally hit after trying on many clothes and there was like nothing left to try on. No one but Liz (Stephiee and Rache had come too) could understand why it was sad... She had been shopping with me and Mom plenty... It really hit me hard that Mom was paying for some of my clothes too.... even though she had passed away.... I have no idea what happened that night for dinner... I cannot remember... I just remember it going to Sunday.... with a 9:30 funeral service at the Temple.
Sunday... we each had a tissue box and a brought a shopping plastic bag for our used tissues to go in just like Mom would have done.... At the funeral Barak spoke... his speech was really good and hit Mom on the nose. It was perfect. I definitely could not do that. I stood up there with him. When I looked out from the Bema while he was talking and when we were being greeted by people there were so many people who we had not seen in years and it meant so much that they were there. People from Mom's school came out, Dad's boss, Barak's friends from school, only 2 people from my school (but it meant so much for them to be there), relatives that I haven't seen in years, members from Temple who I hadn't seen in years, and friends dating back to preschool. Some co workers that were from Newark (who I never got to see) and Sylvan were there... Mom's best friend growing up who is Lubavitch (really really Orthodox) and her husband came to the service... that meant so much because they never came to anything at the Temple because of their religious beliefs.... we have a woman Rabbi... not something they like. They didn't even come to our Bnai Mitzvah. I had wanted to tell Chaya myself.. but she was not home so her husband told her. They even came to the house for Shiva which was also surprising! I am so glad that they came to pay their respects to Mom and ignored most of their beliefs that we do not follow. During the ceremony the Rabbi and Mom's friend who was co-president of Sisterhood spoke very well. At the end the Cantor sang "Sunrise, Sunset" It was Mom's favorite song because it talked of a boy and girl growing up like Barak and I. Barak, Dad, and I were almost in unison with our crying.. that was kinda funny. Then it was time for the cemetery. The procession was over a mile long. There were so many cars! People met us at the cemetery too. Vic and some other cousins made sure that Mom's hole was fully filled in before leaving. They worked very hard. Many people put dirt in the hole... Barak and I didn't because Vic says that the children shouldn't. Some Edison people put in a lot of dirt. It meant so much. I saw Liz's dad crying.. That hit me hard... Liz and Erica put dirt in... for their other mommy... Zoe did too. My cousins Sam and Zack put some in too. Zack was helping his cousin Josh help Vic fill the hole. When we got home there were already people there.
The days until Tuesday went by really quickly because of people coming over. We sat Shiva (mourning) and had services at 7pm each night. The amount and variety of people that came over was overwhelming. Mom touched so many people. I knew that... but never to this magnitude. It means so much for them to come out. Cards were sent by people who we hadn't heard from in ages. People who worked with Mom and Dad at DeVry. Once Dad contacted DeVry I was expecting responses from certain people, they did not fail. I was really happy to get them. Many people made donations in honor of Mom... One hit me hard. A lady (I forget who right now) donated a tree in Israel for Mom... Mom never made it to Israel....now is in Israel in spirit...
The next week I had to come back to school because I had already missed the first week of my graduate classes for my 4+1 Master's program. The first session classes are over next week and there is so much work involved. It is unbelievable. That is actually what I am not doing right now... I needed to get this out. It helped so much to write about it. I know this was a very long blog.... please read it and take it in for what it means.. I love and miss my Mommy very much. This Monday will be one month that she is gone... I keep thinking that she is going to call me just to find out what homework I have to do and then tell me to do it even if I am already working on it. She and my dad raised us very well... I just wish I got to learn more teaching stuff from her. Or even more about the family.
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Shif
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| end of fall 07 and the 2007....So the end of my semester was okay... I got a beating from the work for some of my classes. I passed all my classes thankfully.... my hardest class became my highest grade.... I didn't get any A's but i reached all of the B's.... and a Q (pass grade) in Astronomy..I'm happy about that.
So since school has been done I've done basically nothing. I have read 3 books so far.... and started to get back into the Wii.... playing zelda a lot. but otherwise I haven't done too much. I went shopping for the first couple days of break because I needed gifts for people for Christmas of late Hanukkah presents but now.... I never have any plans. Every once and a while I hang out with Liz or I go w Barak somewhere because I need to get out house. I've hung out with Max and I'm going to visit my grandmother on Thursday. I always forget to call people until it is too late at night but here's the thing.... other people have phones... they can call me too... but no one has. Now I'm specifically write this one here because most of the people I am talking about do not have xanga.. I just needed to vent. It just annoys me that I sit in my house doing nothing because I have nothing to do... Everyone else has stuff to do and is keeping busy.. me I watch TV, play wii, and get annoyed at little things because I have cabin fever. I'm hoping my New Years is good.... I don't want to stay home longer than I need to because I do not feel like seeing the people that are coming over.... my brother is leaving around noon to go on his little escapade w his gf and another couple for snow tubing. That just shows even more that I never have anything exciting to do... The only thing I really have planned is to be going to DC to visit my aunt in mid January and to spend a couple hours in Reading looking at apartments for next year.
Sometimes when I'm home... and my family if out and no one is around I feel really alone. I really hate feeling like that even more I hate even more writing it on here but I just need to write it somewhere and I do not have a handwritten journal bc then I would never be able to read it again... My only escape is my romance novels... and that all I'm really doing is imaging a different life for myself... having a great time, enjoying life. I feel this way at school sometimes because I see how happy Jess is (nothing against u jess, i've discussed this with you already) and then I see my other friends having more fun, getting out there so to speak, and making more friends. I don't go to parties bc they aren't my thing. I do go to Senior Nights to get out of the room, and I go to campus things... but there hasn't been anyone at school that I connect with. I was talking to Amanda and I used to be different in high school... I think I was more playful around people... now all I think about is how much work I have to do for school. If it wasn't enough about that there have been too many people asking about my damn personal life.... I am busy with school work... I'm about to contradict myself... but as much homework adn concentration I need to be able to do my work I want to be around people. any kind of people.
When looking ahead to next year I just want to be able to continue on my work to finish my Bachelor's and start my Master's degree. I also want to make more friends, go to the gym more, and have the time of my life. I've tried to live up the life this past year..... tried to expand my views on things.... idk.... ok I'm done for now. I am sorry if people get the wrong idea about what I wrote.... deal with it.... it's my thoughts and my xanga....
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Shif
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| wow almost 4 months since my last updateOk... well i owe u an awesome update. Camp:
All in all camp was pretty good this year. I loved all of my girls!! They pretty much rocked!! During second session lots of my girls hurt their ankles... good thing I was their RA, huh? lol I loved being at camp. It is so beautiful to be there... the lake, although disgusting, beautiful to look at from Pagoda Abraham. That is a great place to think and escape for a bit... There were some interesting moments at camp... but there were also some moments where it is just amazing to be apart of it. One of my girls first session had her Bat Mitzvah at camp!!! Mazel Tov!!! It was amazing to see the community surround her with happiness, especially B2! B1 was pretty cool too! They connected fast. They were a very easy going group. I am sad that it was my last year at camp because I am starting my Masters program this spring and having to take classes during the summer. Although, I think it might have been time anyway... Need a change for the summer. I will definitely be going back for Alumni Day though. Idk if the people I would want to see would be there but... Cruise, Cruise, Cruise!:
So a little less than a week after camp ended was the cruise! I could not wait for this! It was a great culmination of the summer. The people cruising with us were, obviously my family, Lynn, Liz, her mom and dad, her cousin Evelyn and Aunt Dor, and Henry. There were a lot of us! But it was soooooooo much fun. As soon as we got on the boat me and Liz went to enjoy ourselves.... mmm... Bahama Mama.... lol!
The itinerary for the cruise was this: Leave NYC -> Day at Sea->Nassau, Bahamas ->Great Stirrup Cay (private Island) - > Day at Sea -> King's Wharf, Bermuda -> Day at Sea.
Everyday that we had at sea or we were on the ship at around 2pm we tried to have nap time. This nap time ended up starting with afternoon laugh time. Me and Barak shared a room and it was connected to Liz and Lynn's room. O man.... such fun. It was so easy to hang out having the interior connecting door. We acted like idiots some times and that was fun. Me and Liz liked going to the casino.... I did not do too well compared to last year... but it was fun. The shows on the ship were pretty good too... The different restaurants were cool. Some were good and some were decent. I loved the Asian restaurant and the Italian one. Oh man the food there was good.... especially at the Asian restaurant!!! Right guys??? There was a cute staff guy he was from Canada. There were no cute guys on the cruise besides him... lol! But the four of us had fun. On the days where we were at port, at Nassau Barak, Lynn and I went with Liz's fam to Atlantis. Great Stirrup Cay everyone was on the island. And at King's Wharf I stayed with Liz and her family for the most part. i didn't even see my family until way later. lol I think my parents liked the fact that we were 21 and they could trust us enough to have their own excursions without us. It's ok.... we liked it too.. LOL! I wish we could go back to the cruise! It was nice to have the freedom that we did. School:
After being home for a week it was time for school to start. I moved in with the help of my family of course. In fact I am almost done with the semester. I have already signed up for next semester and I know when I'm coming home from finals (Thursday, Dec. 13). This semester has been rather interesting so far. My classes are ok.. some of them are boring. I hate my astronomy class. My religion classes are okay... and my Education class has a LOT of work involved with it. It is sometimes really hard to keep up with everything. I try to use the weekends and then I realize that I try to use the weekends to relax becuase I have no time during the week to do anything. It is really hard to get stuff done becuase I am out of the room so much doing work that when I am there I just want to relax and watch tv. I am still trying to deal with it.
I figured out my schedule for next semester, as I said, and I am going to be having a four day weekend every week. I have class 11-12:20 TR, 6-9 T, 1-4 W, and 4-7 R. It is sweet. I am hoping to make more trips to see people. I definately am going to make it down to DC and prob back to Ramapo. Two of the classes for next semester are Graduate courses. I start the 4+1 in the spring semester. So my classes are a mix of undergrad and grad. Jessica, my roomie, will be student teaching in the spring. So its going to be interesting with my 4 day wknds and her student teaching and having to get ready adn work almost every night on lesson plans. Its going to be interesting. But good luck!! lol
I'm not staying at school for Interim this year so I think me and Barak are planning to go down to Rache's (be aware) and idk what else. I miss being home for most of January. I'm glad too becuase I get to spend more time with friends and with Sophie (make fun of me if u must...). Okay... well my shift at work is done soo.... I hope you all enjoyed the update! ,
Shif | | |
| camp.... so farSo I have been at camp for about 6 wks. I am sorry I have not updated since I left. Staff week was good, it went quickly which is good. At the end of Staff Week Mechina was here. Mechina is the regional regbo ppl. That was fun.. we went in depth of what RAs do..... that was good. After Mechina 1st session got here..... I was in B2 with Michelle as my co. This cabin was AMAZING! I had a girl from the Ukraine, she was awesome! This cabin meshed really well and got along fabulously. They did have a problem with promptness and cleaning...but they know that... that's part of what we loved about them. They were also a very funny bunk. During my 2 days off that session I went home. The first day off was for my bday! It was fun, we had a BBQ then went bowling. The next morning I got my new license and then got lunch... then I had to head back to camp. The next day off I had I had a day full of appointments. That was fun.... not... So now it is 2nd session.... my cabin looks to be very cool. They get along well. I am very happy about that. I'm almost done with my first real day off... I slept in!!! I slept for 11.5 hrs!!!!!!!! Last nite Barak, Liz, and Lynn came up. We went to Applebee's for dinner and then to the movies. We saw HP5. It was my first time seeing it and their 2nd time. I'm happy they came up. It was fun hanging out with them. I know they got back really late...but yay for visiting me!!!!!! thanks guys!! O Liz, I went back to that strip mall today and got Panera! lol I thought you would enjoy that. O well.... I am almost done with camp... 2 more weeks as of yesterday. Then I have 5 days after that til Cruise, cruise, cruise!!! I cannot wait for that!!!!!!
I know that this is a pretty shitty update I am sorry but I just wanted to give everyone an update.
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Shif
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| really short entryI just wanted to let everyone know that I leave for camp tomorrow. I will be there until August 6th. If you want to send me letters or bday cards (hint hint..lol) here is the address.
Shifra Malkin Kutz Camp 46 Bowen Road Warwick, NY 10990 also... it is 22 days until my birthday!!!!!!!!!! yay!!!!!!! that is all... I have to go pack.... , Shif | | |
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