| | Oh man...
At least I can say my life is never boring...
After doing all my grad school apps I realized that honestly I am not ready to be back in school next fall. I am not ready to be studying again, and don't really have the motivation to devote myself to it. Although it feels like grad school is the logical next step in my life, in my career, I have decided not to be logical.... I have decided to follow my gut instinct instead.
Hahahaha..
I felt kinda bad upon deciding this for awhile. Felt kinda ashamed. I didn't want to get excited and tell people about getting into grad school because I feared that people would judge me for not going and think I was ridiculous. I didn't want people to judge my priorities in life and look down upon me. But Sabs thankful called me out on this and told me that its just my own junk that is making me think that way. That if I am happy and proud of my decisions than every one else will be. And she reminded me that I should be excited about all the acceptances I get, even if I end up denying them all.
So here it is:
This is me EXCITED, telling the world that I got into the Social Welfare program at BERKELEY!!!!!
but I am not going.
And I am happy about it! I am so happy about it! Its such a relief to not even care.
I am happy I got in, but happier that I am not pressuring myself to go.  And that I don't feel guily about it. I feel so peaceful in this decision.
Instead I am staying here another year. I think I am going to get a new job. Something totally different. Move somewhere new in May. Possibly back home, but hopefully just to a new apartment. Plus I will get to stay near my family (In 2 years Liz graduates college and Rachie graduate highscool and my Mom moves to Portland), and I get to get more invloved in my church which I love. And invest in time with my friends here! And get to spend quality time developing my relationship with Jacob. And I think all of these are super duper important things...
Here are photos of what I love about my life...
Icescating Fun. I love the friends I have made here. Esp. Khoa! He is an amazing guy and so funny. I appreciate him.
Christmas Party Sillyness. I love my apartment.
This is my family. My sisters, and Chad and Jakey. I think they are the bestest!
My Valentine! <3
On a totally different note:
The missions trip I went on (check last post) was AMAZING! SOOOooooo amazing. I was blown away! I want to go back. It was such a challange but very worth it. Went to the town of Ixcuintepec Mexico. Seriously no travel agency will get you there. We arrived after an 8 hour bus trip up the mountain that felt like the indiana jones ride.The whole week it felt like I went back 150 years in time...Cooking outdoors on clay stoves in the middle of a tropical jungle, learning the native indian language, helping harvest coffee, hiking to waterfalls with machettis! I spent my time just loving on the people in this town. Especially the children in the church congregation. We went to paint a mural, that turned out to be such a small part of why I felt I was called there. The most amazing thing was to see how joyful everyone in the town was with how little they had. Their life was so primitive and simple, but they knew nothing else and praised God for everything they did have. Man, I came back with a totally different perspective on my life. I will never again take for granted the simple luxeries of a toilet, a shower, and a solid roof over my head.
Praise God!
The Town of Ixcuintepec! Isn't it gorgeous!
This is a shot of coffee beans drying out on a roof in the village.
This is me in the kitchen with the women and little Obed!
The town of San Agustine. A costal town near where we flew in. Spent an afternoon here. Felt like I was in Maui or something... well I am have been to Hawaii but its what i imagine it being like.
Thanks to everyone who still reads this even if I am a sporadic poster. I love you guys!
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| | Posted 2/26/2007 9:17 PM - 3 comments
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