| - Good Friday I ended up in Cambodia last week.
(?).
My life is strange and happenstance. I spend it going, -my goodness, there is [__unlikely landmark__], what am I doing here?- I guess yes, I do want to travel and I do push my limits and I don't say no to anything (even if I should, even if to say yes is really, really stupid and liable to land me in a gutter with bullet holes and the like) but the directionlessness is feeling weirder rather than run-of-the-mill, which it should by now, shouldn't it? Should I be numb by now?
I gave away all the money I had on me oh how benevolent. she decends from her cloud of arbitrary socioeconomic advantage to bestow a full tummy on the wretched folk. bleh. because I couldn't see any way around it. Honestly, as far as I can see the guileless, bleeding-heart tourists are these people's only point of revenue. Jesus Christ, what else can you do?
And I couldn't stand that little girls should have to follow me with umbrellas for shade. I didn't do anything to warrant this.
Not that I could make much of a difference. Just a temporary fix. Maybe it's ecotistic of me, anyway, to wish I were a god who could give the world a band-aid.
Cambodia has no ATMs. In the end I sold some books to an overeducated sculptor couple from Philadelphia to raise the money to pay for my roof-covered sleeps, two meals and a ride back to Proipet (in a Camry with six locals- the driver, two nondescript men, two fat, loud ladies and a perpetually carsick teenager, for seven hours on a road which wasn't paved or level or, at times, a road) from where I hopped safely over the border to Thailand.
There was more to it but I'm spent (it's fitting that I should read The Woman in the Dunes at this point, being so uncomfortable and exhausted).
To sleep! | 
