When You get the hankering for some nice sedative to keep Life flowing through in a manner that is appropriate to the level of Living You consider to be most Absolutely suitable to maintain a positive outlook on life--remember that there will always be those out there who deserve a little bit of Your increasingly awesome Intellect, Insight, and Instability. 

Because who really wants to live like they Absolutely know everything there is about what is going on around them, yeah?  For if that is the case with You, then You have no idea what is actually going on, because You know what? 

Everybody KNOWS who You are.  And that is where the cracks in Your personality is chipped away at, slowly disintegrating--eroding--Your wholeness, eventually breaking down the facade You call YOU.  Then what is left?  A NOT-YOU. 

Through that, they think they have won.  But they haven't.  You know why?  Since this is a new You, that they didn't ever perceive was there before.  And they are far behind in knowing who You are;  the last conversation they had with You is absolutely where that train of thought following their perception of YOUR Life Ends.  ABSOLUTELY. 

Which is to Your incomprehensible benefit, and their total detriment. 

If that is how you want to live.  Y'know, in that mode or perspective in which You are the Master Controller of everything in your Life.  Not King Masturbater, because that's different--and gets pretty damn old once You reach a certain Age.  (Yes.  Once You reach a certain Age, You should have had plenty of chances to have stuck it elsewhere.) 

Now how else can You spread your Goodness around to the others in Your vicinity?  Let's see in the following steps to enlighten You on Your way to Immaculate Perspicacity!

---

NUMBER ONE!

Deny everything that has ever existed in Your Life previous to the new Surroundings in which You decide to place Yourself when Converting to a new post in Life!

This includes new jobs, new relationships, new f#ck buddies, new interests, new subjects, new hobbies, new surroundings.  Because You know what?  Everybody ALREADY believes that they know You!  How incredibly f#cking annoying is that?!?

Not really.

But don't let it on.



NUMBER TWO!!

Aquire Brand Spanking New applicances, technology, and accoutrements designed to fit Your Lifestyle and hobbies!  No one can take away Your hobbies, and if they do, the are TOTAL Bitches in Life.

What these appliances are can be anything found at Your local Best Buy, Sears, Target, Macy's, and any other rich-bitch area up north from where you live.  Because the rich-bitches are ALWAYS up north from where you live.  Why is that? 

Shit do I care.

So how will these new purchases design Your Life in a way that is suitable to throwing off Your compatriots who need to follow Your ongoings and daily excretions in order to keep up with You?  Everything!  Mix up all prior belongings with the Brand Spanking New items in a way that is Absolutely deleterious to the average onlooker's Perspective of You. 

They will not suspect a thing.  And that is ALL that matters on this point.

Next!



NUMBER THREE!!!

Study Your Interests to the Absolute Magnitude and Extent of the Length that Matters of All that is Needed to Pleasurably Enlighten the Nerve Endings that Exist in Both Ends that--

F#ck.

Messed up for a second.

Just don't be a Dilletante.  Know Extremely to an Exact Degree with Utmost Precision, Goddammit! 

And never let it on! 

NEVAR!

Next!



NUMBER FOUR!!!!

Respect Your Professionals and Superiors!

They are Absolutely Your Betters!

Otherwise they wouldn't be in that Position, now would they?

Next!



NUMBER FIVE!!!!!

Know where to find Your Contacts, References, Subjects, and Bitches!

Because we all need a good F#ck every now and then, and these will provide unlimited resources to Fulfull, Restore, and Replenish our Sustenances and Substrates in all Mental, Kinesthetic, and...  well that's all there is to it, isn't it?

Next!



NUMBER SIX!!!!!!

Combine all Fellow Mates and Compatriots into One whole aspect of Your Lives!

Internet, Daily Life, Psychological Remembrances (weak).

Stay in the Here and Now, Goddammit! 

Because that is all there is to recommend You to others anyhow.

Next!



NUMBER SEVEN!!!!!!!

This is Heaven.

It has been, has Forever has been, has always has been (since the Beginning of Time), and will be Forevermore.

Amen/






Next!



NUMBER EIGHT!!!!!!!!

You know that Manifest Destiny is going on till the End of the Year?

How f#cking awesome is that?


July 2008
Uncanny X-Men #500
Astonishing X-Men #25

August 2008
Uncanny X-Men #501
Astonishing X-Men #26
X-Men Legacy #215
Cable #6
Secret Invasion: X-Men #1

September 2008
Uncanny X-Men #502
Astonishing X-Men #27
X-Men: Manifest Destiny #1
Young X-Men #6
Secret Invasion: X-Men #2

October 2008
Uncanny X-Men #503
X-Men: Manifest Destiny #2
Young X-Men #7
Secret Invasion: X-Men #3
Wolverine: Manifest Destiny #1

November 2008
Uncanny X-Men #504
Astonishing X-Men #28
X-Men: Manifest Destiny #3
Young X-Men #8
Secret Invasion: X-Men #4
Wolverine: Manifest Destiny #2

December 2008
Uncanny X-Men #505
X-Men: Manifest Destiny #4
Young X-Men #9
Wolverine: Manifest Destiny #3


Collect them all because You will never get the full story. 

Evar! 

But might as well get much as You can get, Y'know what I mean?  Eh?  Eh?

---

It was a long day yesterday spent away with an abundance of sleep deprivation and sleeping sickness, but the infected flies are all gone away now, except for the fallen Prince who attracted them in the first place.  Asshole. 





As soon I finish this morning beer, I'll be back again!





kthnxbye!

Throughout the course of an unusually brief day where there was nothing to do but ruminate on bettering the world while improving the minds of everyone that is concerned.  It came to my conclusion that there truly is nothing better than the comfort and camaraderie that is associated with having a close communication with the best of friends or companions.  Who are they?  Shit do I care.  Anyway, let's all get in on this joke, yeah?  Shoot!

---

Text bombing your buddy—this is an awesomely inventive way of initiating your friendly friend on how much the world is set up and designed to set your buddy free from the basest emotions of revenge and melancholy.  Have about 200 of your most casual acquaintances to have a sociable square off with your buddy and have them each send a text message to your buddy over a period of 24-hours.  It will be delight at first when the messages start pouring in.  After a whole day of this, it will most definitely get tiring as the messages pile up your buddy’s inbox.  Especially if your buddy is expecting an important text message from someone your buddy feels is important. 

Not to mention the surcharges and fees that will be incurred from all the texts bombarding your buddy’s mobile.  Don’t worry about the casual acquaintances.  They only need to send one text.

Disconnect the cables on your buddy’s home video entertainment system, especially if your buddy only has it in dual stereo mode.  (The sad sack.)  This will especially work on a buddy who absolutely enjoys being entertained by unusual DVD movies your buddy finds to be rather esoteric and pretentious.  This is the perfect type. 

When the coast is clear, switch the cables on your buddy’s system into mono mode and convince your buddy to wear headphones while listening to his music and movies.  Make your point by tuning up the system to full blast letting your buddy know the neighbors can hear everything.  Oh, and your buddy will know. 

After a period of about one-and-a-half CDs or two or three DVD movies, it will be enough to switch the cables of the entertainment system back to stereo mode.  You buddy will thank the electronic gods for sending a wonderful new invention to him called sound.  Little does your buddy know sound perception/depth has absolutely increased infinitesimally, while yours is still at a rudimentary level. 

So do it to yourself first before letting your buddy in on the secret.

Rock Band!  Have you and your close mates practice Rock Band on the hardest level for about two hours, at most.  Maybe you guys will not get it right, but f#ck if that matters.  It will be a fun exercise in dexterity and mind control anyway. 

Find your buddy to join you and your close mates in playing Rock Band to get in on the fun and games everyone is raving about.  After your buddy acclimates himself to the style of the game, starts to enjoy it, and supposedly clues in on to the fun, ramp it up ramp it up to expert level.  The look on your buddy’s face will be priceless!

As previously stated in a prior post, there will always be infiltrators penetrating into your room to discover what the hell you are doing inside, how you are doing inside, and why you are staying inside.  The infiltration will begin with sound pressure pops around the walls of your rooms heedlessly needling you with pricks and pinches to their complete satisfaction.  Next time your silent electronic appliance statically snaps in attempted infiltration mode, slap the shit out of the spot where the snap occurs.  The one who sent that pop will immediately feel that $h!+ and will be completely shut out of your home as the espionage will have been officially revealed.  Paranoid?  Yes?  Well that’s how it goes when things are rolling quite smooth, yes?

Back to your buddy, test his tolerance for public displays of hot hardcore sex action up front close and personal.  Revealing much about your buddy’s personality is not the point of this exercise.  It’s simply a test to see if your homo-social bond can extend itself to greater heights of brotherly love.  Switch from two well-known websites, such as say FHM.com and BKA.com, and observe how your buddy pays attention to either the usually angularly, sharp and unblemished women with the down-to-f#ck bitches in the hardcore pr0n.  You’ll either find out if you’re friend is actually screwed up in the head as everyone else says, or you’ll find out if your buddy is straight out healthy as all hell.  Schwing!

It is easy as hell to locate anyone’s password nowadays, as all that is needed is some personal tidbits of information about your buddy’s life with a few questions asked around—easy as pie!  Assume this particular method is to overtake your buddy’s confidence, or rip apart his fragile hold on reality.  Now it’s playtime!

Convince your buddy to place all his recorded Internet passwords in a location that is infinitely divine to locate (translation: easy as hell), then swipe the f#ckers.  Your buddy definitely doesn’t need them anyway. 

One day, tweak your buddy’s home web browser to stay logged in to a particular networking website your buddy frequents daily.  Now, place a choice photo on the main page and trap that sucker when he next opens his web browser.  The shock associated with such violation of private space will quickly dissipate and leave your buddy in tune with the rest of the world around him.  (Or so he thinks.)  And he’ll thank you for it!

Convince your buddy that everyone in the neighborhood has stopped jacking off or having sex indefinitely.  Remind him that the world population is at critical risk and must be stopped before dangerous attitudes arise, such as prostitution?  Plus the land space!  We must think about the land space before it is all overtaken by a multitude of tater tots overrunning the fields with incredibly depleted amounts of Ritalin in their systems. 

Anyway, as well as this information, add further insight to your buddy that all the neighbors can time within a minute when and where your buddy is about to have a weak and lonely orgasm, while weeping silently as $h!t dribbles. 

The next time you and your buddy meet up for a conversation, boldly state, “My fucking God that was a GOOD F#CK last night!!!” 

Your buddy will get laid soon enough, my friend.  Yes he will.

Here’s a little of something that was learned about the ipod world yesterday.  Or was it ten years ago?  It’s simply awesome to roam around the earth listening to the soundtrack of the lives of other people (those who created the music, $h!+head) while advancing thoughts ahead of the surrounding people by 2:30, or as the usual length is for a Pop Song.  Be bold about it; the DJ is within the mindscape controlling moods, body movements, and psychiatric thoughts that cannot be held in without the use of meds that certainly do the trick for some. 

To further scan ahead with a scanned touch, ipoders can tune into both the feedback world and the surrounding vicinity that makes up their particular position in time and space.

They win.

Teach your buddy to talk to birds, trees, dogs, cats, but not frogs.  No one can knock your buddy for doing it.  If they do, then they’re freaking nuts for doing so.  If your buddy admits it, well then your buddy is freaking nuts for doing so. 

Shuffle/repeat/play.

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Magnificently, it came to my conclusion that EVERYONE has already heard of these before I had even written them!  So credit due to where credit is due! 

This is all of you!