Leopard1487's Xanga

Thursday, November 22, 2007

Thu, 22 Nov 2007 20:41:24 GMT

Jesus loves the little children,

All the children of the world.

Red, & yellow, black, & white, they are precious in His sight.

Jesus loves the little children of the world.

To be loved as a child, to be called a son/daughter of the greatest Father known to man. He loves us so much. Why do we run away from this loving Dad who wants to help...be there for us...give advice? He enholds the greatest treasures on earth & Heaven, & He wants to give them all to His children. Us, the ones who don't deserve anything from Him, but yet He gives us everything. He wants to be there for us when we fail & suceed. To be able to rejoice, hug, & comend us in all we do for Him & the loved ones in our lives. Don't run from such a loving Father. When taking our firsts steps into life He wants to be able to be there for us & catch us when we stumble & fall. Don't shut Him out. Let Him in & engulf you with a love you'll never be able or want to leave. When feeling abandoned & alone He wants us to know we're not. That we'll never have to be alone in the dark, outside in the cold, or locked out of His love. His love will always exsist to burn that little light within that will comfort & warmth the soul & heart. When suffering from the rejection of a broken heart & feeling that there's no point in trying to love at all He will be the one to love on us. To tell us that He has a plan instored that holds so much love we'll never be able to imagine or comprehend the wonder of it all. Losing the friend, family member, the pet, that held such joy, fulfillment, & purpose in one's life....He'll come, pick you up & let you cry in His arms for as long as you need to. He will comfort & refill His love with the one that was lost. Let Him in so He can complete your life...He wants to so much. He lives to see you run into His arms like a child & never leave. He lives to see you smile & be happy wthin His love. Let Him in.

God is so good.....I just know it.

Take care.

Rachael

Tuesday, September 11, 2007

Tue, 11 Sep 2007 03:09:11 GMT

I learned the meaning of love, I have learned the meaning of grace.

I now know the meaning of freedom & such a gift it is.

Decermant & humbleness are now part of my being & I pray to Jesus that I may stay strong & never lose them.

I am full of joy & this beautiful thing called the Hoy Spirit.

Patience, openess, & willingness to go & leave I have asked for, & now been obtained.

In situations where I need Him & call, I have heard an answer. The ansewr of, "Hold on my child for I know this isn't easy, but I'm with you & won't leave you at all. I know what you are going through & it will get worse before the pain is over but I'm here to hold your small hand." I have felt & still do feel that hug when all alone in that corner needing the closeness of a friend. He is there.....& always will be.

A smile crawls on my face when I think: How did I get here? How did I get into this mindset, drive, passion, & lawning? I wish I had answers for my own questions but I don't, & very well may never. I only continue to ask of Jesus to further stretch me to go to the places I don't yet know about & am already hesitating over. That the strength, wisdom, & words I use from this time on are not my own but of His. And that at the end of the day I've made Jesus proud to call me His child.

It's been so long, & I'm glad I've been able to share a little bit of what's been pressing on my mind & heart.

Take care & God bless.

God is so good...all the time...I just know it.

Rachael

Sunday, May 27, 2007

Sun, 27 May 2007 20:14:28 GMT

So blessed...

with family and friends. Those things seem to be taken for granted far too often. Sometimes it makes one think why God continues, even now, to bless us when we don't thank Him nearly enough if at all. When looking back and seeing how He brought people into your life at a certain times it can be amazing. When at your losest of lows He brought someone in to help you up and hold your hand. At the happiest of times, even when alone, He put a stranger then, friend now, into your life to rejoice with you. When in desprate need of a listening ears, He put them there that are now always there when needed. So blessed by friends. How can one be blessed anymore when they have friends that are always there to listen, cry, laugh, advise, and care? You don't think He would but He does do nice things like that. His blessings come in rain drops, sprinkles, showers, and storms. I have felt His blessing and it will never leave me. Thanking Him for the love of a family that is always there is a wonderful feeling to have within. I'm blessed to have a family that will always be there for me and support me in whatever I do, even if I don't want them at times, I rather have it then no family at all. You can know many friends in a life time but only a few will be long lasting friends for all of one's days. Why God has blessed me with friends like that I don't know, but it makes me praise Him even more. I hope I've been as good a friend in their lives as they've been a blessing in mine. I'm continuing to try in being a better friend to you all, and hopefully I'll be able half as good a friend to you as you've been to me. Thinking of you makes me smile because I don't know what God sees in me to bless me with such a friend as you.....but it makes me smile and I thank you.

God is so good, all the time..I just know it.

Rachael

Saturday, May 19, 2007

Sat, 19 May 2007 04:46:59 GMT

Why does it seem that the goal of everyone is more, more, more? More of all the materal things that don't last that long anyway, but still the goal is to have more of the temorary. Has it ever been thought that having less may be better...even more? The glass always has to be viewed apon as being half full and never half empty because that would be thinking negative....thinking like that though, wouldn't/isn't that a lie? Why can't looking at getting to the end or bottom of something special, and not frowned on so much? Having the feeling of complete emptyness is such a refreshing emotion to endure. It makes one wish they felt it more often. The sensation of having all happiness, sorrow, remorse, love, and hate be stripped from your soul..it's hard to believe but it's a nice feeling because....there is none there. To have no emotion within you for a period of time is healthy for one to experience from time to time. It's difficult to imagine of how having no feeling of the positive aspects of life is good....but it is. To be able to just compansate on....everything, and without any emotion tied into it. Yet in the midst of the udder stillness of the soul within, there's a peace, and that's all. A peace that makes one smile to themselves in knowing He wants us to feel that emptyness so we want Him.....more of Him to fill the emptyness. Being able to just smile within and out at whatever comes one's way knowing He already has you safe and secure in His arms no matter how large the storm is......feeling empty never felt so wonderful before.....wanting more of being empty....it's a beautiful feeling, can't describe how wonderful it is anymore...

God is so good, all the time...I just know it.

Rachael

Wednesday, May 02, 2007

Wed, 02 May 2007 23:46:04 GMT

I really wish I could write something positive, uplifting, and reasuring in this post but I can't.....this post is going to be a post of me asking you for your opinion...and me venting I guess you could say.

It was brought to my attention today that I suck as a friend and maybe even in being a human. Now I don't need any lowdown on the human part...yes I do believe I am a human and that I don't lack at being one, but being a friend. It hit me hard, and it's staying with me. I try to be a friend as much as possible aside from my relationship with Jesus, family, and work life. I try to listen too....is that what I'm not good at? Do I not give anyone a chance to speak thier minds? Am I a one-sided conversation person? The words of this person should have offended and hurt but they didn't. They made me think, are they right? Being part of a human means be hospitable, open, and kind....and it's been said that I haven't been any of those aspects. I truly am sorry to any others out there that agree with what was brough to my attention today. Please tell me if I've been rude, not listening, and just a down right crappy friend. I have no excuses and no explanation really...just from aside speechless,,,sorry. Really sorry.

God is so good...all the time.

I just know it.

Rachael

Monday, April 16, 2007

Mon, 16 Apr 2007 23:31:27 GMT

It's such a good feeling to experience a "new discovery". Even if it's been around for the longest time, just experiencing it first hand is a new discovery all in itself. Like a baby realizing they can walk: they've seen others do it, they know it's possible and exsists, but to accually have the ability to do it themselves...it gives them a whole new view on life. A fresh, inspiring view, as if they can now handle anything life throws their way..........You know God's low glow of love is all around...at all times. You see it in people and you know it's there and exsists. It's such a feeling I can't discribe it unless you're able to experience it first hand. You have a joy that continually is with you. That no matter what life throws your way, you'll be ok. God is with you. It's such a feeling, it makes one smile and laugh to themselves in the silence. To praise Him in a way you never thought possible for you to do. To talk and be blown away by His presence is....unbeleavible. You know your pyshical life isn't going to change because of this feeling, but your spiritual one has changed forever. The feeling isn't going to leave. There will be doubts, and there may even be fear, but if you fall to your knees and ask Him to show that hidden joy within you, you will then stand up. You'll stand up strong with His help of holding your hand through the journey............ Like a baby taking their first steps: they will stumble, and may even fall, but with indurence and help they will stand up again and walk.

God is so good, all the time...I just know it.

Take care.

Rachael

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Tue, 10 Apr 2007 00:23:29 GMT

Tired of your surroundings, and the dull life. A calm life, that seems to easy to live. Bound by invisible chains of happiness and joy, but to you it feels like torture. A life filled with people who care about, and know your life has a sence of worth and value. Yet you feel alone even though your surrounded by these "Spirit" filled people. You can't comprehend why these people.....love you unconditionaly it seems.

So you escape from that life that felt like a dungeon. You forget all about the life filled with meaning. You work your way up as high as you can go. Getting away from the chains, not knowing new owns are appearing. Yet these chains bind you down with greed, lust, and desire. Your never satisfied with what you achieved and received for your accomplishments. No one at this level cares what your worth now unless they, personaly, can benefit from your talent. A life of glamor and lights you live, and believe it or not.......you're now as lonely as ever.

Then you have a faint memory. A memory filled with love, and not a selfish one....you get a joyful tear thinking of it. A picture of a church steeple and a young person becomes clear. It's you. You remember of what you used to stand for. A life devoted to not yourself, but to the One who gave you life and gives you every breath you breath.

Run back....run back as fast as you can to get back where you left off...now...before it's too late.

God is good all the time...I just know it.

Take care.

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

Wed, 21 Mar 2007 12:57:13 GMT

God is so good....all the time.

I just know it, and that's all I have to say.

Take care n God bless.

Rachael

Sunday, March 11, 2007

Sun, 11 Mar 2007 01:42:46 GMT

Have you ever experienced something soo beautiful it's.....freaking, terrifying, and even horrifying to a degree. You don't know what to do with yourself and your emotions. It's such a feeling that I'm going to have a hard time describing it. At first reaction you feel scared, and you're not sure why you're being filled with such a beautiful feeling...a foreign feeling. That scared feeling stays and lingers for weeks, even months after you've experienced that beautiful presence, and touch....but you're not sure of what. Which adds to the fear.

Then there's a glimmer....of peace within you....it's like a never ending small hug. That what you went through and experienced WAS a good thing and that it was necessary for your growth. Even though the frightful feeling is soo much more stronger then the good....you know the truth....that everything will be ok, in God's time, not mine It was worth it...wasn't it? That enduring emotional pain and sometimes physical, was all worth it...to get to this point. From A to B. Now the next step is to get from B to C. When I've finished this alphabet I know I'll be at such a place where I'll be so happy. I'll be through the race, battle, test, whatever you wish to call it..... there will be no more pain of any kind...no more questions....no more torturing myself and other people with questions that I know can't be answered..... no more second guessing myself and my heart....it will all be gone....and that point will be when I reach Z and am with God......and that feeling makes me very joyful....but I know He has much to teach me down here. He isn't through with me yet. It makes me somewhat sad....wishing it could just be over. To be able to just be enbraced with that never ending love and carness......to be away from the hate, anger and lies. Then I think of all the people I wish to be with me when that wonderful day happens. I know there's some who won't be with me unless I make the choice in opening that door for them to come and join me in such a wonderful....long lasting love....Who wouldn't want to have that?....I want to serve, I want to live for Him....and I am.

God is so good, all the time....I just know it.

Take care, and God bless.

Rachael

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Wed, 14 Feb 2007 01:29:49 GMT

It's amazing isn't it? When all worldy pleasures and luxuries are stripped away and it's only down to you and God ..what amazing things happen. A gust of love that grasps you by such strength you're almost knocked off your feet, and tears that hold the greatest joy flow down. The never ending comfort and grace that fills you, and all hurt past. The sence of wanting to do nothing but serve and live for the Maker of Makers. All problems seem to be minamized and all previous pain gone for the moment. It's a place where you don't want to leave, and you don't want to let any of that love out of you. And yet once you leave that special place, the place where this wonderful love fills you, the world weighs heavy on your back again.

Then you think, why can't this feeling go everywhere with me? Is something wrong with me that I can't always feel this feeling of God, the One who will always love me like no other? I see my piers filled with this joy and love consistantly. They're not filled with happyness, or with the feeling that life is going wonderfully for them. But with the look of, life isn't going great, but I have God walking with me every step of the way, by my side, ready to talk and go through it with me every step of the way. Why is it when the world weighs me down I'm not able to feel that feeling? Do I need to leave some of these worldly things behind so God will be able to reach me through the caos? That could very well be. Or do I need to leave some of the piers who make me want to be more like them? The pressure of having what they want so much that it hurts...wanting to feel that love like them, from God, I want to lose their friendships? It doesn't seem right...that answer of withdrawing from the world. I don't know where I'd be without some of those piers who helped me get to the place where I am now.

God fill me in and out, everywhere. Let your pressance be known everywhere to me, and don't let me care what the outside world thinks......God is so good....all the time. I just know it.

Take care,

Rachael