Do you ever have those times in your car, where an amazing song comes on the radio, and you  say, "I love this song" while you turn it up louder. Yeah, that was me today on my way home from work. "Awesome God" was on the radio, and it was the part, right before the big crescendo, and the big crescendo is pretty much the best part, ever. So, needless to say, crank up the volume, singing at the top of my lungs, look over, and the car next to me (with their windows down) completely staring at me.. not laughing or smiling.. but more like in complete shock. Probably didn't help that I was totally into this song, and the windows were up (b.c. I had the air condition on) I can only imagine what they were thinking.. hahah, needless to say, I laughed. Alot.

 

"In a poll on religion and the family conducted for Religion & Ethics Newsweekly, 49% of Americans said that cohabitation was acceptable... "

In Sunday school, we had a debate.  The Sunday school class is for singles/career in their 20's.  One Sunday a month we discuss "real life issues" a.k.a. - HOT TOPIC.  So, the discussion of choice was on Cohabitation.  To get the ball rolling, we split in to two groups for a debate. Each group was given one article from the same reference/research, one supported the idea, the other did not, these articles are where the points of debate stemmed.   Good idea or bad idea?  Moral or Unmora/Immoral?   While you can provide support for either side, and arguments against,  the idea was not to sway us in one direction or another, but to make us aware of these issues and how they may affect us and how we'll handle them.   

We were split in to groups, I was placed in the "AGAINST" group.  While I have my reasoning for being against cohabitation by different sex cohabitants, I also have my support for it.  I am always up for good debate, infact, I rather enjoy it.  I suppose becuase usually I am either for or against, no middle ground, so I debate and debate until my point is made, and the other side is either changing their minds, or one of us gets mad/frustrated.... but this one..This was a difficult topic for me, however, becuase I guess I'm a "sway-er"  I could go either way. 

Cohabitation does not necessarily mean by a couple.. it could simply be by two friends, one woman one man, no romantic involvement, strictly professional/convenience/business..whatev.  ...as was the case for my sister and her friend Chris who split an apartment for a year during their doctorate residency....mainly because 1. they didn't know anyone in WV beside each other 2. money was an issue for a single person on their own, especially in the ritzy area they were to reside  3. safety reasons/ protection (esp. for my sis, in a strange town as a single white girl in her 20's)..so in this aspect, I am totally for cohabitation.

On the flip side, if cohabitation is due to romantic involvement by the cohabitants, then this is where it gets tricky.  I can argue many aspects of either side.. I guess. I just Don't know where I go in this catagory.  'Relationship' doesn't have to mean sexual.  Sure, the odds are going to be higher especially confined to the same living quarters, but it DOESN'T mean anything is going on besides living in the same house, you could have seperate rooms, etc..  On the other hand, who knows what could be going on.

I think part of the fun of being married and moving in together, is to discover if you squeeze from the bottom or the middle (toothpaste) and learning the quirks and kinks about each other and then dealing with them..... if you learn it before you are married.. where is the excitement later on...  sure, toothpaste squeezing sounds lame...but in all honesty, its something to think about.  Perhaps you are a middle squeezer, and your other is a bottom squeezer, who knows, maybe this will be a HUGE pet peeve that you would want to find out BEFORE getting married... doubtful..but hey, you never know.  maybe for you it will be how the Toilet paper comes off the roll.... over the top, or from the bottom... maybe it would be the way you fold laundry (or my lack there of)....

 I have a few friends who are engaged(committed) who are living together (for the convenience) if you're going to be together in the future anyway, why pay 2 rents/mortgages/ 2 electrics/cables/internets, etc.

 I have friends who are a couple (no commitment) living together, their reasoning is to see if they CAN live together before they make it official..... so a "test run"  their thought on this is due to divorce rates being so high they don't want to be another statistic, and want to see if it will work before getting married and then potentially a divorce, among other reasons.....

both, are sexual as well. (RED FLAG FOR ME) this is a NO NO in my book.

There are TONS of pros or cons to living together... we haven't even touched the biblical aspect. Sure, you won't find the answer Spelled out in big bold letters in the bible, and nowhere does it say the word "COHABITATE" they probably didn't even have that word back then.... so, nowhere does it say  "IT IS WRONG TO COHABITATE BEFORE MARRIAGE"   BUT - you will find other scriptures that clearly point out faults....and some that are more vague..... 

 

I found lots of articles for both sides, and I liked the following, it had some nice points to it, but it looks on cohabitation as if it were a sexual thing (which in my opinion if you are a couple, this is most likely going to turn into a sexual relationship regardless of if you try to avoid it or not.. (yes, I have stats for that) ANYway, the article below.... has many biblical references.... and I agree with what the author says/references... BUT, what if the relationship is NOT sexual, or NOT romatic....

  Unfortuneatly, I was unable to locate the articles we used in our sunday school class... the statistics for both sides were astounding... so I would have liked to have let you read them... but check out the below if you have other articles that you come across, let me know.

http://www.markcarrara.com/journal/2008/5/30/is-cohabitation-sexual-immorality.html

 

 

What are YOUR thoughts on this... like I said, I see and understand both sides, clearly.  And It is a tough question.

I think it would be different if you could break it into parts. (Couples vs. Friends) (Sexual couple vs. Not sexual) etc. .....  Most of the articles I found that are Opposed are from Christians who view cohabitation as an immoral sexual thing... while.. this is NOT the case for many of those who choose to cohabitate (as with my sis and Chris)........  Many of the articles I found in support of cohabitation are striclty for convenience esp. b.c. the economy is bad, and money reasons, etc.... nowhere does it say b.c. the sex is good..... so.. its up for discussion... thoughts please.

Maybe you are the dream that I am waking from

I see you everywhere I go

You are such a mystery to me, you know..

maybe I am awake... How long will you take?

It's you that needs to rise and shine

and see that I've been waiting all this time...

but maybe in your deams, I'm not the one you see

So Rise and Shine, it's wake up time

Wake up, I've been waiting for you....

Lord, you are faithful.  I don't always understand your ways, but I trust you.  Most importantly, I love you Lord, with all my heart. Thank you for my friends and family.

Please be with LB as he's on my mind, and be with Lisa as well. I pray that you would give them strength, comfort, and knowledge. Be their guide as they follow you.  Help them to be the leaders you call them to be, and the servants you've shown them to be.. You say in your word that you have Good things, things for prosperity, not harm, things for a good future full of hope. I know that whatever may happen, whatever circumstances unfold, it is in your plan, and you have it under control. You are faithful, Lord, and I ask that you have your hand upon them both, keep them healthy, happy, and safe.  Genesis 31:49

 

I ask that you would be with my family. That you would bring joy and make it complete. I pray for my sis as she is so far away, and homesick.  Give her comfort and strength. Help her to meet some wonderful Christ centered people so that she may have fellowship and keep her focus on you as she uses her gifts and talents. I pray for C, J, Mac, and Rusty. I ask that you will be with them and the ongoings of the daily grind.  Be with momma and dad, give them the energy and stamina they need to get all the things done they need to do.  And Lord, if It's in your will for my life, please bring me someone to share in music with.....

Lord, you are faithful and all good things come from you. I Love you and Trust you.  Your will be done.

 

Jeremiah 29:11

Noah: "Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head"
Adam and Eve: "Strangers in Paradise"
Lazarus: "The Second Time Around"
Esther: "I Feel Pretty"
Job: "I've Got a Right to Sing the Blues"
Moses: "The Wanderer"
Jezebel: "The Lady is a Tramp"
Samson: "Hair"
Salome: "I Could Have Danced All Night"
Daniel: "The Lion Sleeps Tonight"
Joshua: "Good Vibrations"
Peter: "I'm Sorry"
Esau: "Born To Be Wild"
Jeremiah: "Take This Job and Shove It"
Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego: "Great Balls of Fire!"
The Three Kings: "When You Wish Upon a Star"
Jonah: "Got a Whale of a Tale"
Elijah: "Up, Up, and Away"
Methuselah: "Stayin' Alive"
Nebuchadnezzar: "Crazy"

David: "I write the Songs"

- Contributed by Kathy Black from Revelife