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| once again i rest my case that the only friend i will ever want, need, or ever have is corinna. some loose touch and we never talk again. some forget to call when they are supposed to and i try to keep a calm exterior even though i'm fuming inside. some are just flat out cool, but i could never get real close to them cause i'm weird like that. and some love to cause drama. don't you love those? you get along great but they seem to be extremely bipolar when you do or say something out of your norm. yeah. those types. so that's my dilemma pretty much for the day. and i end with, corinna is all i'll ever need. | | |
| I had the BEST suprise today!!!!! I opened my fridge to get a refreshing beverage, with the thought that there would be nothing like usual, and found a nice, cold, raspberry apple vitamin water. Top that, bitches. | | |
| School. Hah. I am neither good at it, nor do I care about it at all. I was jsut attempting to do my English homework and I had a realization that I have no interest in what I was reading, what so ever. So I stopped. Who gives a shit about how this guy wants to reveal his past about Palestine? And I'm supposed to take notes on it? There is NOTHING to take notes on. It's a freakin' essay about Palestine and random little rants. What else is there to it? Honestly, how is this going to help me better my future? I'll go on knowing that Palestine was once a place in the world in the 1940's. Fantastic. And please tell me when I'm going to use some algebra in my life. For real. I will never use this shit ever again in my life. And not to mention, the other fantastic classes that I'm taking. Mythology. Yeah, it's pretty neat learning about god's and goddesses, but is that going to help me later in life? And that stupid JMC class. I don't care about TV ratings and how much a commercial costs! It didn't say it would have been that boring in the class description! School is becoming a waste of my time, and most of all, I don't even care. I stopped caring my senior year and it really hasn't gotten that much better. I understand this is MY FUTURE but I can't do this "school thing." I'm not a very good note taker, listener, or tester. I will never make it out of these classes alive without putting everything else in my life on hold. Which by the way, is impossible to do. Who has time to read 40 pages every 2 days for every freakin' class? Bottom line. I HATE SCHOOL. | | |
| I don't think anyone can say, "I know what you mean." when I talk about how many times I've been screwed by my friends. You think you can only get hurt so many times, but I've been there, and way past that. I have to say, I'm more than surprised at the ones who gave up. I guess it just goes to show, no one can be trusted. Even the ones closest to you. I suppose this is my little rant that's been postponed for a while. I don't have the engery to care anymore, but that's so not true. If I didn't, I wouldn't be writing this, would I? It's all so tiring. I can't prioritize lately. The things that should be the most important to me are the least. I guess I was just always ment to be one of those "fucked up" kids. I'm seriously sick of the questions: "What's your major?", "What are you going for?", "What would you like to do in your future?" The answer is the same, "I don't know." I'm not interesting in anything. Most things bore me. I'm not even creative enough to think of something on my own. It really sucks being the youngest. I've been depending on others my whole life, and now that it's time to expand my wings and fly, I can't because I don't know how. It all really sucks. I can't fuck this up, because this is my future we are talking about. What I'm going to do for the rest of my life. I hate to say it, but old feelings about my future are back into play. Yeah, the old depressing ones. Everything would be easier that way. I need a definant change of attitude and life at this point. But honestly, I don't know how I'm going to pull it off. I just hope it's soon. I can't go on living like this. It's to the point where it's getting ridiculous. Funny how one little thing can trigger a whole load of things. Maybe if I had my priorities in order, this wouldn't have happened. I'm just going to pray for a change and maybe my life will be set on the right path. | | |
| YaY! Quietdrive tour was AWESOME! Pretty sad Abigail couldn't go, she would have loved it. Corinna and I had loads of fun though. <3 Adam and Jon <3 My boyfriend's look-a-likes. I'd rather have my boy then them though. =) I went to Warped Tour in Chi-town which pretty much kicked ass. I saw Chiodos, Greeley Estates, Cartel, Billy Talent, Silverstein, Armor For Sleep, The Junior Varsity, Rise Against, Motion City Soundtrack. I think that's about it. I wish we weren't 3 hours late, because we missed hella good bands. Oh well. College is about to start, and I have to say, I'm pretty excited! Although, I would be ecstatic if it never came. =) | | |
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