|
SubscriptionsSites I Read
|
|
|
|
| Nice."Nice guys finish last."
"A girl should always have a nice guy around just in case, but never as dating material."
I've always wondered why society has created that stereotypical
image of the "nice guy," because many times it's seen as a negative
factor in the nice guy's social life. Have the non-nice guys who created this image any consideration for the lives of the innocent nice guys?
Well, I have to admit: I fit the criteria of the nice guy. But that docile personality of mine came primarily from my childhood - from how I was raised. My family's background is based mainly on respect, and thus I was raised up as a child with the knowledge of having kindness and compassion for others, not with the ambition of joking around all day or making fun of others or doing all sorts of crazy things or getting into trouble just to be accepted by everyone else, especially the females. Yet for some reason in today's world, most females fall for this consensus of the society. They merely follow the stereotypes.
As for me, I just can't seem to allow myself to be like those boys who are either tough, proud, cool, outgoing, witty, funny, or whatever. It's just not me.
Can I not live as I am and not be labeled as some deviant from the norm?
[Can't nice be a positive thing?
Can the multitude of selfish people stop using these innocent guys for their own personal benefit and comfort?]
So when it comes to the topic of nice guys, follow whichever point of view you'd like, but for me, I have the trait of genuine compassion and respect for others at the top of my priority list for the measurement of worth as a human being.
--
We don't have to conform. We don't have to wear what everyone else is wearing. We don't have to do what everyone else is doing, just to be accepted. It doesn't matter what car you drive, how much money you have in your wallet, who you've dated, what your GPA is, or even what brand of jeans you're wearing. None of those things matter if there's nothing in your heart for others. Then your life would be filled with complete selfishness.
But as long as you have genuine compassion and you're able to share, you're good. :)
Because that's what being alive is for.
------------
Recommended: Nobuta wo Produce for those who haven't watched it yet (It's a Japanese Drama). Ask me for a DVD of it if you'd like to watch it. ^^
| | |
| 星期六晚上. 那兒都不想去, 也無法入睡
忘了如何讓眼淚.. 停止流下
還好沒人看見, 沒人會說話
星期六深夜 我想起了妳
陪著我形影不離
明天我會面帶微笑
但無法忘記妳
-王力宏
---
Go for long walks,
induldge in hot baths,
question your assumptions,
be kind to yourself,
live for the moment,
loosen up, scream,
curse the world,
count your blessings,
just let go,
just be.
- Carol Shields
| | |
| There's a type of love that's unconsciously longed for by many and held by few. A type that's worth all the pain and trouble involved in the process of finding it and holding on to it. It's the type that doesn't depend on status to be present. It goes past the barriers of relationships and friendships to make the effort to care. This is the type of love I treasure when it's found.
Even after a heart-breaking end of a love relationship or after years of silence with a former friend, she would still care about the well-being of past lovers and friends. Even after all romantic feelings have disappeared, she would once in a while think, "I wonder how he's doing.. I hope he's happy at this moment," or even make the effort to find out how he's doing and to support him if he's falling. While a normal person would forget and move on, she would still genuinely care about the other side. Because perhaps the brokenness can be restored with just that love.
It's a commitment to the friendship, no matter how broken the bond may be.
Out of all the people you know, who do you think has this kind of love?
--
well there's one point.
I seriously need to work more on my writing style..
countdown ~2 months till UC apps are due!!
| | |
| Comfort vs. Passion.
In a love relationship, which one of the above would you choose to have? That is, if you can only have one of them, and with each comes advantages and also disadvantages.
With Passion, there's the excitement - the fast beating of the heart, the butterflies in the stomach. The fun of the chase, the cute secrets, the random inside jokes, cliffhangers - all of that stuff. There's also the happiness from the surprise of him or her showing up at your door holding sweets or a cup of boba, "just because". But in these kinds of relationships, there are often awkward silences or periods of miscommunication, because both expect so much from each other to keep things fun and exciting. And because of that, both are oftentimes afraid to show each other their true sides. Afraid to show discomfort with annoyances. Afraid to disagree with serious matters. And ultimately, afraid of rejection. Thus it's all superficial. It's risking your feelings and emotions for an unstable enjoyment.
And in the end when the fire dies down and the passion runs dry, then what happens? The basis of the relationship is gone.
For me, I'd choose comfort. It's peaceful. It's nice. It may need true commitment from both sides, but the result is something next to blissful. There are no fights and arguments, but there are mature discussions and eventually resolutions. Feelings can be known to each other without saying a word, but with just one look to understand. You have the constant beam of support from the other person - just as two playing cards can lean on each other to stand up strong. It's the comfort of being able to lie on the grass at a park or somewhere peaceful and relax next to each other without the need of saying anything; just being in the company of each other is contenting.
But in reality, many relationships have a bit of both, and that combination makes good and long-lasting relationships, that is, if there is commitment backing up both qualities.
random side notes:
Flings may be easy to get with superficial charm, but later on in life it comes down to the inner character - the true self. And only with that genuine self can someone find true comfort, the comfort that has commitment written all over the realms of that relationship, with another person.
Friends first, perhaps lovers later? I think that theory works pretty well. There would be no looking back on a failed relationship and saying "yeah, it didn't work out because he wasn't the person I thought he was."
AHHHHHHH. I don't know where this is going.
*runs off to sleep*
| | |
| My measurement as a human being, my worth, is the pride I take in
performing my job -- any job -- and the respect with which I treat
others. I am the equal of the world not because of the car I drive, the
size of the TV I own, the weight I can bench press, or the calculus
equations I can solve. I am the equal to all I meet because of the
kindness in my heart. And it all starts here -- with the pizza delivery
dude.
-from the article, "Be cool to the pizza dude."
| | |
|
