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| so...
yet again...i stop writing sigh....i really got to get back into this...it's my anti stress thingy....oh well so what to write about:
my great grandmother died since i was last on here. SHe died of lung cancer *cries* i miss her because i was really close to her, she was one of the few people in my family that actually loved me.....i miss you grandma pretince...with all of heart i do...However unlike most people i got to say good bye to her, i was one of the last people to ever see her before she did die, and that means the world to me<3 i just which i had more time with her....yeah..thats all i want to say of that matter
BOYS....
in other news ....me and adam ( yeah remeber him lol)...well me and his brother have been well kinda friendly...he said yes when i asked him out, and i hope he actually means it other wise it's gonna break my heart... so steve please hun...don't break it. I've fallen for him, now i don't know if it's real love just yet...that i have to wait and find out for myself but i do know i like him...he seems real and sweet and kind n *smiles ..so i guess i <3 steve...lol...well thats about it for now...bye bye | | |
| ****** stars are pretty...anyways....
i got three weeks and then i move hehe and i got a job..a crappy one as far i can tell, but a job.....
the only things that ahve been bugging me are the usual..parents...and the fact that everyone is slowing sliding away from me....it hurts cuase i don't want that to happen....i'm going to glue to me from now on. | | |
| mew...
so elliot might be comming to vist me? I hope so! i need company...anyways haven't got a lot to say right now, cause i;m burrowing someones' puter right now...but yeah..life is bittersweet.. it has it's awesome amazaing moments...and there's the parent moments...i just can not wait until i get out! OH yeah i'm moving in september then i don't have to deal with them on a daily base. anyways much loves peoples..bye byes | | |
| so....whats there to say, when you have no hope anymore...ok thats a lie, i do have hope, i always have hope, cause i;m a navie little girl...but i feel that i shouldn't anymore. I NEED HELP!  I did do it too, what i said i wouldn't do...i did try and end it, twice now...once i did it, but yeah didn't work ( the way i chose) and the second time, core had called just in time. grr...nothing ever changes...nothing..NO matter where i go it's always my fault, so it must be, but i've got to understand how i am going to deal with this. | | |
| i hate my life....just as i think it's going to get better, my mom goes and does something stupid. She screamed and yelled at me infront of like 6 people at the laundry mat....wanna know why? cause i was helping her do laundry...everyone just stared at me like i was some crimminal or sumthing, But i didn't do anything. grrr... my nan seen it all and now realises why i am the way i am. sigh. at least i have Jason and core...and ray...yeah i guess i have her too. with out thems..oh god i would kill myself...cause there like the soul reasons..i couldn't hurt them, and if i did go and do then i would hurt them badly. and i can't do that, ever. not to them.
another another note...the damn weather is not hot. it's not that bad, but up here we;re not used to it, so i keep almost passing out..it's not cool at all...hmmm...oh and
HAPPY B_DAY JASON!
loves ya
guess thas all my ranting and blabbling for today...much loves | | |
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