Marvelanne's Xanga

Long over due....Part 4

Sat, 31 May 2008 09:49:25 GMT

Before I begin, I would like to apologize to all my Xanga friends. Life has been so crazy I have left you out of the incredible story God has been writing!

I'll try to make it up to you now...

~ Part 4 ~

As Josh and I continued our courtship it began to be abundantly clear to both of us that God had ordered the events of our lives so that we could be together. As we continued our courtship we found ourselves not just discussing everyday things, but deep things. Talking about the reasons behind choices we had made, realize how different we were, yet how God had put the desire for Him in both our hearts as the most important thing. Since we had been friends for over five years, there was much we already knew about each other. Thus, very soon, I knew this was the man I wanted to marry.

Because things were happening fast I had no idea when we would be able to get married. I was challenged to really trust God in a new way. The desire to spend the rest of my life with Josh was strong....but I had no control over when those events would unfold. Little did I know what God had in store!

The week of March 21st, Josh told me that he had asked my dad for permission to take me out. Since it was Easter week, he had good Friday off school and asked if I wanted to go to the zoo. I said "Yes!"..... So, we planned a whole day. Go to the zoo, then go to dinner...

Here are some pictures of our zoo day :

We left the zoo and decided to go to Sonic and get some ice cream. We had my little brother and sister with us so they were all for it! Josh and I love driving backroads and watching the scenery. It was a beautiful day, so we rolled down the windows, turned up Josh's cowboy music (not to be confused with country) and enjoyed the drive.

When it was time to eat dinner, we swapped out my little sister for a brother and Josh took me to Carrabba's Italian Restaurant. He had gotten permission for our "chaperones" to sit at a different table so I was excited! I got some time with him all to myself.... We had a wonderful dinner and a great visist. All too soon, dinner was over and we were packing up the food to leave. Josh asked me if I was ready to go...of course I said no, but I knew we had to. He surprised me by saying my dad had given us permission to stay out a little longer.
As we pulled out of the parking lot, he said he missed the campfires we used to have at his old house. (That is where we got to be good friends...visiting around a campfire). Then he asked me if I wanted to drive by his old house and see where we used to have them....I said okay.

When we pulled into the driveway, my brother, (Josh's best friend) was there and had built a campfire! It was the most perfect fire I had ever seen. I remember thinking that if Josh would so something so special on our first "date" he was sure to make it special when he asked me to marry him!

I stood by the fire waiting for Josh to bring chairs over, and I was speechless. I couldn't believe he would do something so special....as I stood there I remember the thought going through my mind that when he did ask me to be his wife, that it would be next to a campfire! It would be so romantic and special because it was a special place for us.

By this time, Josh came back with chairs...and I noticed all my brothers (there were three there at this point) had disappeared. I figured my dad knew about everything else so it must be okay. We sat down and Josh began to tell me a story. It was the story about the first time he met me, how we got to be friends, how he fell in love with me sitting in front of a fire just like the one we were by... Let me pause here and say I was getting sad. Everytime I had heard this story before, it would end with "and someday I am going to go to your dad and he is going to give me permission to marry you". So as I listened to Josh finish up the story, I couldn't believe it when I heard him say, "....and earlier this week I went and talked to your dad. I told him that I loved you, and would take care of you, and he gave me permission to ask you to marry me."

I so romantically said "What?" The to my astonishment, Josh stood up and pulled me out of my chair. He dropped to one knee in front of me, pulled a ring out of his pocket and asked me if I would marry him! Of course I ..... burst into tears! I stood there crying so long he said "is that a yes?" I said "yes" and he slid the ring on my finger. What a joyous moment! Totally worth the wait I have had for so many years. After I looked at the ring on my finger we knelt down in the grass next to the fire and asked God to bless our lives together.

Then my brothers came back and hugged us. Here are a couple of pictures:

So...that is how I got this!

On June 14th at 4pm....we are getting married!

I'll try to post more details soon...but I wanted to give ya'll an update on the saga of my life these days!

A Story...Part 3

Tue, 25 Mar 2008 23:30:33 GMT

I guess I am overdue for the next installment of this story.... There will be several in a row as I have a lot to catch you all up on!

In December of last year, Josh (formerly know as "this fella" ) came home from Virginia where he had gone to finish a degree and find a job after teaching locally for many years. It was around Christmas time and he usually spent time with our family during the holidays. This year as he was around and something was different. I had no idea what was going on at this point but I could tell something was up. Because I was still in my state of denial as to my true feelings on the subject, I had everyone convinced that anything more than just being friends with Josh was out of the question. How glad I am that God does not give us what we think we want...or make decisions based on what we feel at any given moment!

Christmas passed and the new year started. Josh again spent pretty much the entire New Years Day at our house. Since we are friends and have always enjoyed each others company I had a good time. Little did I know how my life was about to be turned upside down!

Unknown to me, Josh had called my dad a couple of months before and asked if he (Josh) had any chance to be more than friends with me. He came home having absolutely no idea whether I would be open or not, but knew that God had put the things in his heart he was dealing with and that he needed an answer one way or another so he could move on with life. Josh started popping up at the most random times....I called my mom one day and she had just finished a long conversation with him. I remember asking her if he was getting ideas about me....she said that I just really needed to pray and seek God about Josh and what I wanted or didn't want. Then Josh showed up at my church that Sunday! I saw him come in from where I sat in the choir loft and felt my heart nearly jump out of my chest. What on earth was he doing there? Then after the service, my dad invited him over for lunch...which my dad never does!!!! We didn't really talk much that day...I was still in shock, I think, and he had a lot on his mind. He asked my parents if they could "talk" and spent over two hours behind closed doors.

While they were talking I was wrestling with my own issues.... You see, Josh and I come from very different lives. I kept thinking that we were too different and came from such different places that we would not be able to come to a good place because of the extremely different lives we had lived. As I kept telling God things of this nature, I remember clear as day when He hit me over the head with a baseball bat. Through the words of James which I had been studying, God pointed out to me that I was making distinctions among myself. I realized that I was so busy telling God what could or could not happen that I had not really stopped to ask what He wanted. I left the sink full of dishes I was washing and went to my room. I fell on my knees that day and confessed the sin of arrogance and pride and asked forgiveness from the Lord for my attitude. I told Him that I was willing for whatever His best was...and that I was ready to look and recognize whether or not it was Josh. I felt peace come to my heart that I had not ever had before....

A Post....nahhh a Picture

Sat, 22 Mar 2008 14:17:07 GMT

Snow and other goings on....

Wed, 19 Mar 2008 00:09:18 GMT

Hello XANGA LAND!!!!

Boy, life has been so crazy that I am sorely behind in updating ya'll with what has been going on lately. I going to try to get a good update done here. So, I'll recap a few highlights over the past month....

~ Me and my young man (Josh) at a Chris Hogan "Zero to Hero" conference

~ My role as "Katie" in Desoto Family Theater's production of "Meet Me in St. Louis"

(Me)

A theater review in the Memphis Playbook about our show:

Here’s what Jon Sparks of the Commercial Appeal thought of it:

Theater review: 'Meet Me in St. Louis' at DeSoto Family Theatre

By Jon W. Sparks
Special to The Commercial Appeal
Friday, February 29, 2008

DeSoto Family Theatre's production of "Meet Me In St. Louis" celebrates the virtue of old-fashioned predictability. But you could have guessed that.

First and foremost it is aimed squarely and wholesomely at the family. The well-scrubbed musical serves up the idealized Midwest of 1904, where life is all about the boy next door, the fabric of family and where a world's fair was the cat's pajamas.

The musical's genesis was the 1944 movie starring Judy Garland and I'm pretty sure that Ashley Wieronski, playing the Judy role of Esther, had studied it closely. So much so that she was channeling the singer right down to intonation and tremolos.

Wieronski, who graduates from high school in May, is supernaturally gifted and has shown that talent on stages around the region. Her big voice can carry a show, but happily, that's not necessary in "Meet Me" since there are some capable singers in the other main roles: Katelyn Nichols, Karen Kirk and Lisa Bryant are standouts in the vocal department.

Strong performances come from Fred Harpell, the witty and solid grandpa; and Jeff Smith who, as head of the family, is rarely in the loop (although he thinks he invented it). Also notable is Emily Cohen, a remarkably poised 8-year-old who handles the substantial role of Tootie with plenty of confidence and wit.

Director Keith Salter has a sure hand in this production as he did in past years with "The Music Man" and "My Fair Lady." A lot is going on, but it's all kept in balance.

The sets at DFT are, as usual, ambitious. Repeatedly wrangling the front porch so that it morphs into an interior wall of the house is a chore. On the other hand, the Smith home is as warm and comforting as the imagination permits. And a big clang, clang, clang to the trolley, which deserves a credit itself.

jon@jonwsparks.com

Being a part of this show was one of the greatest things in my life. My family built the set (mixed and chose all the colors for the interior and did a lot the finish detail work) I had some great helpers! It was also one of the biggest challenges of my life. The director pushed me and pushed me to be the best I could in this role and I am so grateful to have had the opportunity. It seems a silly thing...but since I was a little girl, I always wanted to be on stage. To have my own song that I got to sing in the spot light...no one singing but me. I had given up my dream, figuring it to be silly and self centered. On opening night, for two seconds as I started my song...God reminded me that He was giving me my dream. It was an awesome crowd, and just for a moment I was by myself, on stage, in front of a crowd making them smile. God is so good to give us the small things in life as well as the big ones!

~ We got snow!!!!

I promise I'll try to be more diligent to write....after all there is still a story progressing that ya'll are overdue for an update on!

~ Marvelanne

Part 2

Mon, 04 Feb 2008 01:14:41 GMT

There has been such a demand for the next part of "The Story" here is another post:

"The Story...Part 2"
Before I begin with current events, I need to clarify a few things from the last post. This fella' had expressed interest in me all those years ago to my brother but never officially talked to my dad as far as I know. When I heard about his interest I told my brother that there was no way I would ever consider marriage to this guy, my brother passed this information on to him... The fella never actually talked to my dad until much later...but more on that in a minute. After I said "no" three years ago, he came back to me and apologized for being out of line and said he hoped that we could still be friends. I remember thinking that it was not possible to still be "friends" after something like that came up in a friendship....but somehow we managed to do it. We became even better friends....and I am glad! In response to the question, did he pursue me again, I have only just found out that he has been dealing with this issue for over three years! Nothing was said to me about the situation again until one month ago today.

Now...lets see, where was I? Ahh... Part Two of "The Story".

Since I was old enough to understand the concept of marriage, I have had very definite ideas about the kind of man who would be a possible candidate to step into the role of husband in my life. Having a very strong willed heart myself, I didn't figure there was anyone out there who could blend with my personality. I spent quite a bit of time telling myself there just had to be at least one, but didn't really believe it. So, when I met this fella' six years ago, I wasn't really at a place in my relationship with the Lord where I could honestly evaluate anyone for this position of leader in my life. I was still a kid, dealing with my own issues and living in a bit of heart rebellion to the Lord. However, in reading through my journals of past years, there were many character requirements that were added to "The List" during this season of growing.

When this fella' and my oldest brother became good friends I naturally spent more time in his company. I hang out with my brothers all the time so we were naturally together a lot. The more time we all spent together, I saw a friendship between he and my brother deepen into that of very best friends. The fact that one of the requirements on my "List" was that whoever I married had to have a friendship with my brother, 'cause my brother and I are best friends I didn't plan on giving that friendship up just to get married, crossed my mind but I couldn't go there with that train of thought....

Girls, you can understand when I say that those of us who committed to leave our hearts in the Lord's hands have a more difficult road than most. It means we have to work extra hard to not encourage young men in a way that would draw unwanted attention to ourselves. I became an expert at concealing interest or any other such emotion that could be misunderstood. If a guy was interested in me, I wanted it to be because he knew that it was something God had led him to and not because of anything I had done to purposely draw his attention. I wanted to be found serving the Lord, not looking for a husband!

This being the case I chose not to make more of the events the next few years would bring than what I saw at face value. Meaning, I didn't read into anything nice he did for me as being something special just for me. Or the fact that I would look forward to time spent with him....he was a brother, right? To be honest, I went completely in the opposite direction. I immensely enjoyed this fella's company, but couldn't make too much of it. He had so many things that were similar to my life and goals and visions... but I convinced myself that I just knew it wouldn't work.

Someone asked me why I said "no" the first time (even though the question was not officially asked). Well, there were two specific areas that we disagreed about, which were important to me. I knew enough to understand that you cannot change people. If I couldn't accept these things being different, then a relationship beyond friendship wouldn't work. I also knew there was a specific vision this fella had, and because of my health issues I did not want him to ever have to choose between following God's call on his life and being able to provide for me. In those moments when my brother shared the fact that this fella was interested in me, I reacted. I never expected that he was interested...and I was slightly upset because there were a couple of major issues that would not allow it to work. In my pride, I said some things that were not at all kind...and unfortunately he heard them.

Yet even in this....God would take the next three years to develop a friendship not based on any kind of potential interest, refine character issues and draw both this fella' and I us closer to Himself.

I know ya'll hate "to be continued" but this is it for now! I'll write more soon....

Oh...and also pray for me. I was in another car accident today. Thankfully, no one was injured but some of the issues I had just gotten over from the previous accident have resurfaced. Pray that I'll be able to leave it all in the Lord's capable hands!

A Story....

Fri, 01 Feb 2008 16:56:05 GMT

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your path" ~ Proverbs 3:5-6
"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you..to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11

This passage from Proverbs and the verse from Jeremiah have been guiding words for most of my life. At times when my faith was weak...God would remind me of His love through these verses. I would once again put my desires, goals and dreams back on the altar and surrender completely to Him. I don't know about the rest of you...but it always seemed to be easier to tell someone they should do this than to actually do it myself.

Year after year, day after day I did the same thing...until finally one day, I knew that I meant it with all my heart when I told the Lord that I was content to be where He had me. I no longer desired to be in the world and experience things. I wanted nothing more than to rest in Him, stay home and serve my family. After ten years of wrestling with this contentment and finding my identity in my relationship with Christ, I was truly at peace, complete peace and I was happy! I was planning how the next four years of my life and how they were going to be spent on various projects with my brothers and sisters, finding ways I could help my mom around the house and with her business. I discovered I didn't have time for the "C" word or a relationship with any young man that could lead to the "M" word because I had too many things to do. With peace in my heart and being able to completely rest in the Lord, I was freed from the pressure of 'Old Maid Syndrome'. You know what I mean...when people ask you things like 'How is your love life' and 'You do realize your biological clock is ticking'! It makes you feel like something is wrong with you! I make it a point to never say such things!

When you are raised with a goal to be number one, a daughter of the King and number two, prepare all you can to be a wife and mother....well, it is easy to let number two become a focus. When out of control, this misdirected focus causes every young man you meet to be compared to "The List" and seen as a potential spouse.

While this comparison can be useful, and has been thus often in my own life, it is also easy to let it become more important than serving the Lord with your whole heart. As I made the choice to be free of this bondage, there was such joy resting in this freedom brought to my life!"

Then a most unexpected thing happened....

I found out that my best guy friend (who is not related to me by birth) had called my dad and asked if he had any kind of chance to be more than "just friends" with me! I was so shocked I could hardly speak...and for me that is no small thing!

Now most girls would probably jump up and down and say "did he really?" Not me. I said "He did what?"

I know, I know...what kind of a response is that when a young man finally notices you and talks to your dad?

Well, my history with this fella' over the last five years has been full of fun times, sad times and lots of time sharing each others burdens in regard to our respective ministries. We have so much in common...yet when I thought of anything more than friends with him, I had no peace in my heart. Secretly I wished it would work, but I knew I could not not change the things in his life that I desired to be different and I didn't want to ruin a good friendship. In fact, I convinced myself that in no way, at no time, would it ever work...and via my brother said to this fella' : "There is no way I would ever consider marrying you!"

Let me pause here and say to all my Ms. Bennett and Mr. Darcy fans...you might find a few similarities in this story!

While I didn't find out until much later that my words had been exactly relayed to him, I knew that I had done the right thing...even if it had not been handled in the best way. Over the next three years we continued to be friends and things were fine as far as I was concerned. Little did I know what God was about to do and the story that would unfold before my eyes....

To Be Continued....

Friday, February 01, 2008

Fri, 01 Feb 2008 16:50:46 GMT

Pondering thoughts...

Tue, 15 Jan 2008 00:00:59 GMT

Life is full of moment's that make you stop and really consider God's hand upon your life. The last couple of months have been thus for me. It seems everywhere I turn, I am reminded of yet another way God bestowed such undeserved Grace upon me. As I have been reading through the book of Job, I am ashamed at how much I have blamed God! Job lost so much...yet he never once turned against the Lord. Oh that I would have such a response....

As we begin this new year...let's all purpose to willingly abide with Christ as we walk the path laid before us. We should not question "why" but rather be drawn to the feet of our Lord as we discover how He can be most glorified.

Take courage my friends....

Please pray....

Wed, 09 Jan 2008 18:50:22 GMT

Please be in prayer for this family. This was passed on to me by my aunt.
http://cfhusband.blogspot.com/ This is the blog of a husband married to a woman with Cystic Fibrosis(sp?). They found out she was pregnant which delayed a critical lung transplant. Today she was taken to emergency surgery to deliver the baby because her lung function was almost zero. They are both stable but need lots of prayer....

Start of the new year...

Wed, 09 Jan 2008 15:27:41 GMT

I can't believe it is 2008. Time goes by so fast....

This year is already starting to look like it will be full of wonderful blessing, opportunities for ministry and situations to apply knowledge and wisdom.... I'll explain more about that in the future. For now, let's just say I am learning how faithful God is to give us the answers we seek!

I have been pondering Psalm 91 - Questioning myself as to whether or not I dwell in the shadow of the Almighty. Do I spend time with no one buy my Lord? Do I hide myself in the promises of His word?
I can honestly say, I have seasons where I am so surrounded by the presence of God that I am overwhelmed. Then I get busy and tired and let my guard down... I think after what happened in the accident and God so obviously heard my cry for safety...I have learned in a whole new way just how much God does listen to the cries of His children.

May you all be reminded there is no greater place to be than in the shadow of the Almighty. To be completely surrounded by His love and presence...to know the joy and fullness of His grace and might!