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| wow... Well, now that school has started and I never see any of you online these days, I figured I may as well make a concise update on how things have been going in Canada. Well, they've been going, going, going, gone. Like a home run. The crack of the bat was the day after I'd flown in to Toronto International airport, but we'll get to that in a minute.
First, I want to bash Air Canada. (Skip this paragraph. I highly doubt anyone deserves to listen to me getting ticked off about stuff) See, Air Canada does now know the meaning of in-flight entertainment. At all. Air Canada's idea of in-flight entertainment is the crappiest movies they can FIND (They look for, and pick the worst ones, I think) and the worst music they can possibly FIND, LOOPED once every 2 hours, on 10 different channels, only one of which I could force myself to listen to. The rest were so bad that even on that plane, sitting there for 13 hours, I couldn't FORCE myself to listen to them. And did I mention they LOOPED? I heard the same talentless sludge over and over and over again, interjected by the poorly-made films. Oh, and to top it all off... they only had 3 movies, on a flight of 13 hours. What did they have the rest of the time? They had some news, and then they had some news in French. They had some sports news and then sports news in French. Then some business news and then some business news in French. Even that, I could handle. The French deserve their news too. (In terms of ethnicities, there was us, and a few hundred Chinese people, that's it. When she got back, Mom said "There aren't any Chinese people left in China, they all came with us on the plane.") But, what did they have on after that? What did they have on as "entertainment" before the movies? They had... a, listen to this, one hour long DOCUMENTARY about coffee. COFFEE. I know we're Canadians... I know our reputation. But for the love of Cocoa, WHY? Is coffee really that FASCINATING? I can tell you right now, I was downright RIVETED the whole frikkin' time. The saddest thing is that I watched it because I had nothing better to do. Ah, the movies... I almost forgot the movies. Heaven forbid...
Matthew's Movie Reviews:
My Super Ex-Girlfriend: Now, this was the first movie, and it got off to a bad start. I'd already seen it, but I didn't enjoy it much the first time, so this time was just... hell. To make matters worse, my MOM kept commenting on how bad the movie was and how bad it is that people actually make movies like that these days (Not to mention her speeches on how immoral it all is). Now, when my Mom says it's badly done, it's badly done. She likes watching Little House on the Prairie and, I figure, most of you haven't heard of that show, but... put it this way. It has plot holes the size of... the Mariana Trench. Big and deep.
Undercover Love 3 (something like that.) Now, Air Canada always has a Chinese-made movie for the Beijing flight due to the masses of Chinese people who are on the flight without fail. However, considering Chinese standards, it's usually a hit-and-miss deal. On the way to Beijing, the movie was absolutely terrible. However, oddly enough, this one was actually a bit of relief in the nightmare. It was a Chinese cop-comedy flick, and, well, I like cop-comedies, you know, they've got a bit of action and they're comedies, they're action comedies. It's a good all-around movie experience. So, this movie was pretty cool, especially on the plane and directly after My Super Ex-Girlfriend. Mind you, it had plot holes BIGGER than a Little House on the Prairie episode. I, myself couldn't follow some of the major leaps in space and time that that movie took. I'll always say I liked the movie, but I'll also say that near the end, it didn't make any sense. at all. But I still liked it. I DIDN'T CARE! Although that may be hard to believe, I mean, I don't know if you know how big of a stickler I am for the story in a movie. A movie has to have a solid story.
The Devil Wears Prada: No, the devil makes a movie about Prada, you heartless, inhuman animals.
That's all I can say.
Anyway, I didn't want to fill the entire post bellyaching about Air Canada. I'll get back to the moment at hand.
I got back to Canada and there was no snow on the ground. I was worried. But, I was doing fine other than that. You may recall that I was really sick before I left, and I was still a bit under the weather. I was of sound mind by that point, but I still had a sore throat. On the way home we stopped at A&W and Dad and I went and got burgers, fries and Root Beer. In glass mugs. Root Beer mugs. There aren't any A&Ws in China, in case you haven't noticed. And that was my first glimpse of home, ordering a Teen Burger (hey, it has cheese & bacon, what more can I say?) with root beer, in English with a cashier who was courteous and said "Have a nice day." The next day I was sicker and stayed at home, but the day after that, Mom dragged me out to the mall, presumably to buy things. As I was walking through the mall, it hit me, the culture shock, it'd been building all that morning and there in the mall, this wave of culture shock hit me. I flipped on my iPod Mini (4GB) and put in one earphone, tucking the other in my shirt neck, to calm my nerves a bit. I never ended up buying anything, really, but after that we went to Wal-Mart, and I grinned wryly at the concept of the hyper-market that we learned so much about in Geography but could never experience in China. (The Wal-Mart on the other side of the city is just... nothing like Canadian Wal-Marts) But, the culture shock was still strong...
This is how my thoughts ran: (Things in " " are spoken)
There were... so many... white people... everywhere. And so many big signs... for fast-food joints. So many fast food joints. "What's that, Dad?" Little Caesars, Pizza... pizza for 6 bucks. Barq's root beer... tastes so... bitter, aw heck, it's an acquired taste, I'll drink it anyway, I always used to like it. Bottle of Barq's costs a buck 25. That's 7 kwai. In China I'd consider that a ripoff, I wouldn't be able to force myself to buy it, even if I was really thirsty. Now, it's the norm. Well, some places, you could get it for a buck. And wow, what the heck was that? That guy in the Ford just let us go first at the intersection. What? I'm in an EB Games? Good God, everything here costs 60 dollars! So many white people, and they're all speaking English, Lord, I can understand what they're saying. Oh, geez, that lady knows nothing whatsoever about video games, her poor son is subjugated to having her control what he buys... Shopping chaos... I don't know what to buy, so much selection... So many real games, not in Chinese... Boxing day, lines are so long, I can't buy anything here. "Eh? Oh, yeah, Dad, I was just thinking that same thing, we'll never buy anything here today, better to go back home and check the internet, plan what to buy and stuff." Oh, that's a nice cardboard stand-up, wow, that's the new Tony Hawk game, Project 8. I wonder if anyone in the class has ever even played a Tony Hawk game. Odd, only one of the double doors open, Chinese doors always open... Wow, it's weird, there should be snow this time of year. That blond girl in the parking lot has a nice butt. She also has a boyfriend. I've forgotten, white girls have butts. And can be blond. And may have boyfriends. *sigh* Not that I really care... I've forgotten, I'm dead to girls, I just don't care anymore. Our Toyota RAV 4 is a nice color. [silver] Man, I can't wait to get back home. Dang culture shock... sometimes I question as to how many times I have to move before I start to vomit and get "motion sickness" from switching houses. I've lived in almost 28 houses and changed schools 15 times since I was born. I'm 15 years old. Geez, there's got to be something skewed about that.
The next day, I awoke and started surfing the internet for games. I discovered that the new Total War game was out without my knowing, which, I suppose, was to be expected since, I usually ignore a game no matter how much I want it, before it comes out, because otherwise, I'll want it more and... there will be a problem. Ask Anna, I explained the whole process to her, partly because I happened to be talking to her when the 4nticip4ti0n set in. When I want a game really badly, and I surf the internet getting more and more content about the game... it's crazy. I check out the features list... and drool. I download a screen saver and desktop wallpaper... and drool. I check out screenshots... and drool. All this drooling, it isn't physical, it's mental, and emotional. I begin to CRAVE the game. Then, I enter a phase where I need the game like I need water. (or milk, more on that later) And that same day, I went and bought it. And I realized that, when you buy a game like that, it's one of those games that cause you to lock yourself in your house and have no social contact with anyone, if it can be avoided. And it was good. Really, really good... ... ... Ok, it was freakin' AMAZING. It was awesome. Exhilarating. Friggin... Euphoric. All that stuff. I swear to... William the Conqueror, that game is off the hook. You may have read reviews that said that it wasn't completely, totally awesome... well, they lie. They all lie. The game r0xx0rz my b0xx0rz. My new b0x, that is, I don't believe I mentioned... I got a new computer. I'm working on sending a picture, but the case is black, with transparent side panels and it's got LEDs of different colors in the side-fan that look friggin' sweet. The thing has a handle on the top of it for taking it to LAN parties. And the specs? Well, they speak for themselves.
AMD Athlon 64X2 Dual Core Processor 4200+
2.20 GHz, 2 GB of RAM
260 GB Hard Drive
100% pwn4ge
That's what I'm talking about when I talk about my l33t b0x.
Well, I bought Medieval II: Total War and played it for weeks straight. I tell you, it's awesome. Especially on that computer... wow. So is Canadian milk, only, not when it's on my computer. Don't worry, I didn't spill any, I'm just clarifying. All I did was play Medieval II and drink milk, sometimes mixed with Nesquik chocolate syrup, sometimes not. (Can you get Nesquik at Jenny Lou's? I doubt it.) But... seriously, Canadian milk is SO much better than Chinese milk, the taste, the texture, the time it takes for it to spoil, even the packaging. I LOVE Canadian milk. And Si Ying, I know, we've had conversations about milk and, until you've had Canadian milk, you can't judge milk in general. I've just forgotten how awesome Canadian milk is. Canadian Bacon... It's been so long, but the return was SO GOOD. Canadian bacon is just... mmmm..
I got to know the youth group at the local Church by staying up all night on the eve of New Year's Eve. (There was church the next day, so it worked better) They seemed friendly enough, most of them. Some of them, especially friendly. But, yeah... they were all white. It felt weird. After staying up the entire night with them, I got to know them fairly well. I almost died that night though... I was drinking Sprite and someone made me laugh... haha. I had to clean up the floor, which was luckily not carpet, while still coughing really hard. Before we went to the church though, we saw a Hockey game between the Owen Sound Attack (us) and the Brampton Battalion.(them) There was a fight in the first 5 seconds of the game, right off the face-off. It was amazing. There were at least 3 or 4 more fights during the course of the game, and that was another reminder: "Canada is a non-violent, peace-loving country. Why? We get out all our aggressive tendencies by showing our support for hockey fights, body checks and other physical violence."
You may have noticed that for a time, my screen name was "X[D-Cornst4lk," rather than the generic "Cornst4lk." This is because I joined a clan on the game "Freelancer" (It's actually fairly old, the game I mean) The clan X[D was, for all intents and purposes, the police force of Rheinland, [Germany] which, in the game, is a collection of star systems. The game takes place in the future after Humanity has begun life anew in a far off place called the Sirius Sector. The four houses [countries] are Liberty [States], Rheinland, Bretonia [Britain] and Kusari. [Japan] The house Hispania [Spain] broke into two different groups, the Outcasts, who are not truly human, because of extended drug use.(The drug Cardamine is worked into the DNA of everything on their planet. Including the water) and the Corsairs, who are pretty much pirates. There are different corporations, police and military forces and pirate and criminal groups in each house and as such, there are a vast array of opportunities for exploring, role-playing, and just making money, or having fun. I reached a ranking of Admiral in X[D (you may have noticed, as my screen name reflected my new rank) before the clan merged with another clan, the "Dragons." There is a real faction in the game called the Blood Dragons, a "terrorist" group that strives to reinstate the shogun, who was disposed in a coup led by Samara industries that installed the present government. And, I know, all you Koreans may well try to kill me for this, but we role-play (In other words, in our chat in the game, we pretend to be our characters) our Blood Dragon Ronin, and we've given ourselves Japanese names to go with the role-playing. So, online, I would be "Dragons-Miyamoto" who, as of a few hours ago, did a Kamikaze mission into New Tokyo with "Dragons-Hiraga" to get across the message of the Dragons for Shogun Nagayoshi. Hiraga let loose his warcry of "For the Shogun!" and went, guns blazing, directly into a battleship. While, I was trying to type "For true Kusari!" into the chat window, and accidentally crashed into New Tokyo before I could finish writing the sentence. (It came out like "For true Kusa"... And I'm like... dang it, I can't even die right! So, if anyone owns the game: Freelancer, you know who I am and what I do. I die. But, not skillfully.
Anyway, back to reality. Getting a house here has been interesting (We've just been renting a *small* place) and it's taught me a lot about banks and mortgages. In short, Banks are evil. And now, I understand why people hate Jews. I'm not saying I agree with it, I mean, I don't have anything against Jews, but if the first banks and money lenders were run by Jews, then... I can understand why there's been some animosity in the past that built up over the years. The Mortgage rates are just brutal. And the banks won't give you good interest rates unless you go through a brokerage. I don't even get that? Just because the person walks up to the front door instead of getting a broker to do it for them, the bank rips them off? Banks are getting loads of money... INSANE loads of money.
Alright, I've only got a few commands for all of you, before I go.
ah-ahem
READ:
The Man who was Thursday (may be a bit rough with the English, but I'm sure you guys could handle it, if armed with a dictionary.)
The Catcher in the Rye (May be a lot easier with the English. There's a lot of cursing though, keep that in mind if your parents speak English. This book is in the school library. ok? So, go and read it, there's more than one copy, I think, not sure.)
WATCH:
Saving Private Ryan (Bit gory, but, the story, the emotional significance of it all, it's too good to pass up)
Platoon (Optional, but you have to watch Saving Private Ryan. Also, not as gory)
HELP: Me
This is a shout to anyone who can help: I need, the serial number (aka. CD Key) of, "Hitman: Blood Money" Alright? I lost the CD Key for that game. I know, it's embarrassing, but I REALLY need the code! Especially since I want to try it out on my new computer. Won, I gave you a copy of the game and I THINK, not sure, but I THINK, you may still have the code, written on a piece of paper, likely, the cheat code sheet. IF I wrote there. Maybe, I'm lucky, I'm really really lucky.
Like Dr. Who, after regenerating, gets in a sword battle with this Alien for the fate of planet Earth and he gets his hand cut off. Now, after regenerating, he doesn't really know who he is. But, anyway, he's like, "Well, now I know what sort of man I am. I'm a lucky man. Because, after regenerating, I still have just enough residual energy to do this..." and he grows his hand back, just like that. Rose throws him another sword and he says. "And this new hand, it's a FIGHTIN' HAND!" and then defeats the alien in personal combat and saves Earth.
LISTEN: to
Band: Underoath
Songs: Giving up hurts the most (almost 8 mins long  )
I'm content with losing
Down, Set, Go
A Boy Brushed Red, Living in Black and White
I know, I didn't like it, in the past, but now? It's pretty much my favorite band. I'm not even kidding, it's friggin' awesome.
SEND: Your Addresses
to: Me
So that I can send you stuff in the mail.
And, that's all I have to say about that. But, now, I'm going to get into a topic I'm sure you've all been waiting for, with baited breath. SCHOOL! I was going to start school last Monday, but after a talk with the Vice-Principal, I'll be starting school in February. Yeah, February, I'm not even kidding. This is for a variety of reasons, but basically, that's when their 2nd semester starts. And in Canada, everything is semestered so, I can't just disrupt their system like that. Besides, my parents changed their minds, I'll be going to the Catholic school. There, we talked to the Guidance Councilor, and she said the same thing, wait till February. However, until then, I won't be idle. See, in Canada, to graduate from high school, you have to do 40 hours of community service, everyone does. You can do it whenever you want to, in the Summer, Winter, whenever. And, it can take many forms, like, you could shovel snow for an old person, or you could coach Pee-Wee Hockey or other sports teams. (like, really little kids) My friend Caleb volunteered at his Church's Vacation Bible School event, which is this thing they have in the summer for kids to have fun with various activities with a Christian theme. He said it was great because he finished it all in 2 weeks and had fun doing it. I'll be doing mine until February at the Billy Bishop Museum, here in Owen Sound. Billy Bishop grew up in the house that the museum is now in. If you're wondering who it is, I don't blame you, Billy Bishop was a Canadian fighter pilot in World War I and shot down 72 enemy aircraft, more than any other pilot in the British Empire. The museum is dedicated to him and World War I Military Aviation. Anyone who went with me to the Military Museum in Beijing knows that I know one heck of a lot of stuff about the military. So, it really suits me, and I'm glad to get it done now, rather than in the summer.
And last, but not least, I'll describe my personal condition. I'm sitting in the living room of my house. My keyboard is half-on this round table, and I've made a makeshift mousepad out of a CD binder and a paper towel. My computer is sitting in the window sill, facing away from me so that the wires on the earphones that came with my iPod can reach from the jack to my ears. On the wall next to me, I've taped the unit-fold out from Medieval II because I'm too lazy to keep unfolding it and re-folding it. I'm using a small cushion to support my left arm and ward off carpal tunnel syndrome and I'm sitting with really bad posture in an old love seat. It's a couch for two people ok?! I really wish It'd get a name with fewer implications. Especially since a spot here, wedged in between the wall and the table with wires spewing from everything, and an empty jug of milk sitting on one side of my improvised mouse pad, dedicated completely to gaming, is no place for a lady. I'm sure you all will agree on that.
But don't worry, after we get our new house, I'll resume my role as a human being once I have returned to my natural habitat.
From the Desk.. no, there's no desk...
What I meant was: From the cluttered table of:
Matthew “Cornst4lk”
Winnett 3,722 words
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| News of OldFor the most part, life goes on. Nothing particularly
exhilirating has happened. I'll start by saying that we'll
probably have some semblance of a comic up VERY SOON. Like,
Monday. If not, go bark up the artists' respective trees, it
isn't my fault.
I'll follow up with a referance to a past post, the "Big Meaty Post" in
which I trashed Underoath. I think I'll take a bit of that
back. I dont' mind it now. But, it's still not one of my
favourite bands.
And I'll continue along the same vein, like in a good combo, of
referancing to past posts. Wednesday was the last gathering of
"The Five" That is to say, Kaishen, Me, Won, TG and Sang Mok. It
lives on in my memory, just as Sang Mok lives on in all of our
memories, and in reality, so far away. It was a blast, though, a
good way to finish off a chapter of our lives. With Sun Guo,
Winning 11, FIFA and DoA2: H. DoA2: H, I am unstoppable at, I
might add, ph34r my l33t ski11z, ph34r TG's 133t sk11z too, cuz, he's
my ultimate Tag-Team partner.
KS is still into Sun Guo like cream is into a boston cream
doughnut. I just had this flashback of what they tasted like...
truly divine.
Hot Chocolate... That's another topic of interest. I consumed 7
cups in 2 days and then stopped altogether for 2 days. However, I
have found that copious quantities of it actually helps me complete
homework faster, I'm not even kidding. I'd also like to add that
the Hot Chocolate I make is better than the crap at Starbucks.
Seriously, just taste it, it'll blow your mind.
Pocky, there's yet another object of fascination. The Japanese
have done it yet again. I never quite know what to make of Japan,
it's a truly bizarre culture, to me, but I will continue to say, time
and again: Japan never ceases to come up with something really, really
cool, that everybody wants. Whether it be video games or pocky,
it's good, it's all good.
______________________________________________________________________________________
-Matt
November 12th, 2006
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| G4/\/\!ng 4dd!ct!0n!n 7h3 w4k3 0f y3s73rd4y, /\/\y /\/\!nd r331s \/\/17h g4/\/\!ng
3uph0r!4! ph34r /\/\y 1337 sk!11z 47 D04 2: |-|4rd(0r3. ! 4/\/\
t3h pur\/3y0r of j00r d3f34t, t3h h4rb!ng3r 0f j00r 4nn!h!147!0n....
n00b.
Now that that's out 0f the way, I'd like to elaborate on the events
leading up to the euphori4. Yesterday was awesome, all
things considered. I'd like to make something clear.
Japanese people don't know how to serve eggs. At all.
Seriously, raw eggs? How much effort would it take to BOIL
THEM?
But, they do know how to make games. Time and again, Japanese
game companies and developers floor me with some amazing game, and it's
just amazing. I remember the time that I played Onimusha 3 for 10
hours straight, with a break in the middle to go to someone else's
house, taking the memory card with me and picking up a few bottles of
Bawls energy drink on the way. For that, my respect for Capcom
goes beyond words. As far as fighting games go, the first one I'd
played was the original Virtua Fighter, the PC version. I was
really good at it too. It was awesome. The most recent one
I'd played was Mortal Kombat: Deadly Alliance. In MK:DA, I'd
developed a highly effective defensive strategy which consisted of
blocking followed by a special attack or combo. And in MK,
most of the characters have very similar fighting styles, and
capbilites. There isn't a big difference between them.
DoA:H is wayy different. It's so much deeper and has very
intricate gameplay. I was so used to MK, that when I started
playing DoA:H yesterday, I was totally unused to the style of
gameplay. DoH
seems to promote a more aggressive style. As a result, at the
beginning, I sucked miseraby. I'll admit it and anyone there can
verify it. Seriously, just ask them. Actually, don't, just
take my word for it. It was total
suckage. I was t3h suxx0rz. BUT, it was fated that I would
not be t3h suxx0rz forever...
I'm a gamer, a persistant one, if I do say myself. So, after
interest in DoA:H waned, Si Ying's youngest sister decided to spar with
me, so, natually I accepted, sensing the opportunity for
practice. Thanks to her good sportmanship, I was able to
consistantly beat her until I had a fairly concise knowledge of the
basic concepts of the game. I learned the importance of punches,
running kick combos, I learned how to block properly, lots of little
things and big things that helped loads. After my intense
training, my skill increased exponentially. Seriously, I
challenge anyone, now. Bring it on. It's like I woke up to
a new reality of butt-kickery. Ask TG, I dethroned him dispite
his skill in the use of Gen Fu. (aka. The Old Guy)
It's a moving tale of sinking to the lowest depths of suckage, and then clawing a way up to the highest plane of 0wn4ge.
______________________________________________________________________________________
-Matt
5/Nov./05
P.S.
! 4/\/\ 73|-| [*|_||2\/3¥0|2 0ƒ _|00|2 |)3/\/\!§3.
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| Philosophy
We have some comics. Seriously. They're just...
not up yet because of a bunch of reasons. Trade secrets...
So, I've decided to just write stuff to satiate your appetite until the new
site comes up. And no, we haven't decided on a name yet. I'm trying
to think of something avant-garde. (not really) Heh, mabye something
nihilistic. (not really)
Well, Sang Mok leaving, it's made me think a bit, I guess, so here's some
philosophy
I do not read advertisements. I would spend all of my time
wanting things.
Franz Kafka
Know your Kafka, it's healthy. So is a hatred of Japan,
according to Sang Mok, which leads me to hold a small memorial of him in
this entry, even though it may be a little early, as I’ll be seeing him
tomorrow. haha
*moment of silence*
Sit vis nobiscum, Sang Mok.
(May the force be with you. -Latin)
I'm sure the loss we will all feel will be ineffable.
And now, back to the post.
Catch a man a fish, and you can sell it to him. Teach a man to
fish, and you ruin a wonderful business opportunity.
-Karl Marx
For a Marxist, he sure knows how to make money.
All I know is I'm not a Marxist.
-Karl Marx
Oh, I guess I'm wrong... wait, what? haha
The theory of the Communists may be summed up in the single
sentence: Abolition of private property.
-Karl Marx
So, China
isn't a Communist country. It's a quasi-Communist country, maybe a pseudo-Communist
country. That still retains the basic ideals of Communism but embracing
capitalism as long as it makes them richer. That means they're sell-outs.
They don't care about their grand Communist ideals; they care about money and
control. Religion in China
is illegal for Chinese people. The reason why, is that, if they allow
people to believe in God, then loyalty in God will take precedence over loyalty
to the ruler.
Here's something Aristotle wrote:
A tyrant must put on the appearance of uncommon devotion to
religion. Subjects are less apprehensive of illegal treatment from a ruler whom
they consider god-fearing and pious. On the other hand, they do less easily
move against him, believing that he has the gods on his side.
-Aristotle
So, if the kings of ancient Greece controlled by religion, how
do Communists control? That is a question about which I could think about
a lot, seated on a bench on a street near my house at about 8:30 at
night. It's perfect for thinking, even though Franz Kafka says that you
don't need to leave your house to think or get philosophical.
You do not need to leave your room. Remain sitting at your
table and listen. Do not even listen, simply wait, be quiet, still and
solitary. The world will freely offer itself to you to be unmasked, it has no
choice, it will roll in ecstasy at your feet.
-Franz Kafka
But, then, you know how it goes…
Truly great madness cannot be achieved without significant
intelligence.
Henrik Tikkanen
I have no idea who in the world he is, but he’s cool, I like
him already. Even though he’s dead.
Eh, anyway. The whole
point of this whole thing is this:
The one serious conviction that a man should have is that
nothing is to be taken too seriously.
-Nicholas Butler
No idea who he is either, but me and him, we’re like kindred
spirits. Haha
2006-11-03
-Matthew
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