If I'm not in love with you, what is this I'm going through tonight? And if my heart is lying, what should I believe in? Why do I go crazy every time I think about you, baby? Why else do I want you like I do, if I'm not in love with you?
And if I don't need your touch, why do I miss you so much tonight? If it's just infatuation, then why is my heart aching to hold you forever? Give a part of me I thought I'd never? Give again to someone I could lose? If I'm not in love with you.
I registered for 16 credits this semester and my schedule is hectic to say the least. However, I'm actually extremely excited about a few of my classes:
Conservation of Natural Resources Creative Writing Mass Media of American Culture English 1B (Composition and Literature) Intermediate Algebra (Gag)
I'm really looking forward to all three of my writing-based classes. I'll most likely be a stressed out basketcase the entire semester, but it'll all be worth it in the end.
"I'm coming back in a few weeks. Let's have dinner. I miss your beautiful face so much."
As soon as my eyes read those words, my heart started beating uncontrollably. It was him: my kryptonite; the only man who can excite me from hundreds of miles away. I smiled as I responded. "You know I always want to see you, love."
I met Tyler in 2005. He was my coworker at the Palm Springs California Pizza Kitchen. At first sight, I didn't really form an opinion about him. I had never been involved with somebody that I worked with, and I intended to keep it that way. However, during my first morning shift, he caught every bit of my attention. There was just something about him. He radiated sexuality and charisma. I couldn't explain it, but as I was staring at him, my entire body started heating up. He looked over at me, and I literally had a hard time catching my breath. He walked towards me, and as he passed, his hand brushed against mine. At that moment, I knew... He was going to be mine.
The next few months were filled with passion filled nights and amazing physical pleasure. He got under my skin like no other. He made my heart race and put a smile on my face that lasted for hours. The mere sight of him made me incredibly flustered (in a good way). And boy, did he have a way with words. We had a beautiful thing going on. And the fact that it was a secret made it even more appealing to me. But sadly, just like all good things, we came to an end. I moved on to another job, and we slowly drifted apart. He ultimately ended up moving to Santa Barbara.
He's the absolute only fling that I've ever had where the sparks reignite every single time that we speak. Before his text, I hadn't talked to him for months. But still, just like no time had passed at all, he still made my heart race and put a smile on my face that lasted for hours. We have always simply, wonderfully fit together. He's the counterpart to every ounce of my sexuality. Every time I come into contact with him, intense feelings come rushing back into my body like we never left each other.
I'm in complete lust. And with him, it's the kind of lust that's going to last forever.
It's my first day back from the beautiful Maui paradise, and the feeling is very bitter sweet. I'm glad to be home, but of course I'm going to miss the luxuries that came along with the splendid island. And now, it's back to reality. At least I have my memories.
(Haha. I don't know what I was going for with this one).
I've been listening to this for 2 hours straight. If my soul could be transformed into music form, it would be this song.
Did you check the tires, put gas in the car? I don’t think you’ll need too much, ‘Cause you ain’t gonna get that far. Did you pack the good times? Don’t forget a map. Just in case the route you take isn’t there to take you back.
You can hold any girl that you like. Fall in love when it’s easy at night. But you wake up wondering why, She ain’t ever something better. When you’re lost, and you’ve run out of road, Find what I already know. In the end, close is all there is. But you won’t find this.
There’s once in a lifetime, And there’s once in a while. And the difference between the two, Is about a million miles. Oh, you might get lucky, While the moon is looking on. But in the truth of the morning, The stars will be long gone.
You can hold any girl that you like. Fall in love when it’s easy at night. But you wake up wondering why, She ain’t ever something better. When you’re lost, and you’ve run out of road, Find what I already know. In the end, close is all there is. But you won’t find this.
Oh, in the end it’s me you’re gonna miss. ‘Cause you won’t find this.
