Mewtaila's Xanga

This Might Be Goodbye

Sat, 17 May 2008 21:06:57 GMT

Heeey, everyone. I've been a little quiet lately, haven't I?

Well, there's a number of reasons for that.

I've had this Xanga since December 9, 2003. That's almost four-and-a-half years. I started it in eighth grade to keep track of friends of mine that I didn't see as often as I'd have liked, and now don't see at all.

I've had it all through high school, and I graduate on Wednesday.

I've gone through a number of phases, mostly embarrassing ones, that I've recounted here for all to see.

I think, after so long and so many memories, I'm ready to move on.

Yes, I am leaving Xanga. Maybe now, maybe at graduation, but I am leaving. This site is outdated, I don't talk to anyone on it anymore (with a few exceptions), and really, I'm just ready for something new. So what's going to happen is I'm migrating to my Livejournal. It seems a little pointless to you, most likely, but it's what I wanna do. XD Clean slate and all that. I also want to keep in touch with my fellow graduating seniors, and Livejournal just seems like an easier way to keep in touch.

What about my Xanga-only friends, though? Well, I do receive email updates, so I'll be able to keep in touch with you guys' lives, AND Anonymous comments should be enabled on my LJ. So you guys can drop me a line whenever you want!

Or, if you have some sort of personal vendetta against Livejournal or something, you can also catch me at DeviantART, and I still intend to restart Honor Among Thieves next year. Plus you can always email me at mewtaila AT gmail DOT com.

Where I am now:
- I am graduating high school, but I failed Algebra 2 (surprise, surprise) so I don't get my diploma at graduation. I have to take summer school to get it, but I'm not really that upset about it.
- I am a passionate atheist.
- I've got a couple of jobs I need to apply for.
- I have two comics in the works.
- I need to get my learner's permit.
- I've learned to learn from my mistakes.
- I talk to myself for fun and comfort.
- I walk more often than I have ever walked in my life.
- I'm taking good care of myself. Not great, but good, and I never feel "bad" unless I'm sick.
- I went to senior Prom and I loved it and looked beautiful.
- I feel a little lost - sometimes more than a little - but I know I'll get there in the end.

Where I Think I'm Going:
- I'm taking a year off before going to college to get my license and learn to live a little.
- When I do go to college, I intend to get a Master's degree in Counseling Psychology.
- At this point, being a psychologist sounds like an incredibly fulfilling career for me.
- I'll do comics and art on the side.
- I want to move away from Kansas... a little.
- I want a little house all of my own.
- I may or may not get married. It's one of those "I'd like to, buuut..." situations.
- Read my lips: NO KIDS.
- I'd like to raise a lot of different pets at some point: ferrets, parrots, etc.

So that's the plan, everyone.

Love you all.

See you at LJ.

Sunday, May 04, 2008

Sun, 04 May 2008 19:09:53 GMT

OHMIGOD OHMIGOD OHMIGOD

WE HAVE A WII

AND BRAWL

BUT MOSTLY A WII

DAD JUST RANDOMLY BROUGHT IT HOME

HOLYSHITAAAAAUUUGH

*dies from glee overload*

Saturday, April 26, 2008

Sat, 26 Apr 2008 02:03:36 GMT

Last night I had a dream.

It started off with me in my kitchen, getting a can of what looked like tuna. I opened it up to find neat, tasty-looking "fish nuggets" that looked like bits of grilled chicken. I popped one into my mouth and found it tasty; it tasted like chicken, too. However, I became aware of a rubbery sensation while chewing it, a lot like finding a piece of gristle in the meat. I tried to spit it out.

Only a human fetus came out of my mouth instead.

Actually, "fetus" isn't quite the right way to describe what I vividly recall spitting out of my mouth. Think an 8-inch tall human with no face and all the skin ripped off, nice and sinewy and bright pink. With a large wound on its chest that its lung was hanging out of. A wound caused by my teeth.

Even in the haziness of the dream, I freaked out. I spit it out as fast as I could - the limbs caught on my lips - and then, to my horror, I began hacking and retching. A whole line of these fetus-things was coming out of my stomach and up my throat, bound for the kitchen sink. At least half a dozen, all sticking together courtesy of their entrails that were wrapped around each other. And I felt each and every one of them.

Really, I must commend my subliminal mind for the wonderous amount of detail it put into the dream. Simply amazing.

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Wed, 23 Apr 2008 03:02:24 GMT

I have had no appetite today.

It's really odd... I just haven't felt the desire to eat today. o_O My stomach still hurt/grumbled and I felt hungry, but I didn't feel like acting on it. I even skipped lunch (partially because of the sucktacular school food, but still). I had a bag of puppy chow and a vitamin water for lunch and I've hardly touched my dinner, even though I still feel hungry.

I'm feeling perfectly fine otherwise... physically AND mentally. Am I going anorexic without my consent?? XD

Ah well. I've still shoveled some food in to shut my stomach up. It's just really out of the blue, this has never happened before.

Wednesday, April 09, 2008

Wed, 09 Apr 2008 01:37:40 GMT

Hello! I'm alive! XD

Life's been interesting lately. I had an emo day, but now I'm on the upswing. I've felt pretty good these past couple of days.

Knowing people love you and support you is definitely a plus.

Also! Few more songs on the playlist, including the ZOMG AMAZING "Insanity" by Oingo Boingo (GOV. YOU WIN AT MUSIC.) and a similarly-themed song by Nine Inch Nails. I swear, every time I think my respect for Trent Reznor can't grow any more, IT DOES. :3 Scary to think that it was my mom who got me into NIN... and that she gothed out and went to their Live With Teeth tour...

Anywho. That's what's up with me lately - happy stuff, much love, awesome music, and atheist pride. 8D

Thursday, April 03, 2008

Thu, 03 Apr 2008 07:55:12 GMT

I think... I know what I want to do with my life.

I was stressing out earlier, but having that "plan," whether I end up following it or not, is a comfort now.

I'm deathly scared of time and growing up and moving on. But somehow, I'll make it. I always do, and I always will. Somehow, someway.

Anyway... I need to do a bit of research and a little more soul-searching.

Love you all. <3

Wednesday, April 02, 2008

Wed, 02 Apr 2008 04:18:51 GMT

Urrrrgh.

Retaaaaiiiinerrrrrrs.

On both my top AND bottom teeth.

I sound utterly retarded when I talk... and I don't know where to put my tongue. ;_;

Sunday, March 30, 2008

Sun, 30 Mar 2008 21:02:22 GMT

I just beat Star Ocean.

And I got the Albel paired ending.

...

FUCK YEEAAAHHH.

Fun fact, a lot of the people working against you in the last half of the game are named things like Berial, Belzeber, and Luther. However, if you look at their katakana names and filter out the political correctness American developers injected into the game, you get Belial, Beelzebub, and the Creator of the Universe, LUCIFER. D: Zomg. Appropriate, since they use angelic/demonic avatars to swarm the Eternal Sphere.

Aaand no one probably cares. XD BUT I DO!!

Later. Probably gonna play it again. Maybe.

Friday, March 21, 2008

Fri, 21 Mar 2008 21:23:49 GMT

So there is this wonderfully tasty flavored water out there called Dasani Plus. Two of the flavors were often sold in a vending machine at Broadmoor. However, they were almost always sold out. I tried those machines almost every day and I was able to get maybe 3 or 4 bottles of the stuff in total.

And then they took them completely out of the vending machines. ;__;

BUT! Then Dad, as a part of Mom's whole "get the family healthy" scheme that's doomed to fail but oh well, started buying flavored waters at the store.

INCLUDING SIX-PACKS OF DASANI PLUS!!! IN ALL THREE FLAVORS!!!

Ahh, life is so good. :D *drinks Orange Tangerine water*

Also I was going to get my learner's permit today, but they refused us at the DMV because we didn't have my birth certificate. *shrugs*

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Tue, 18 Mar 2008 20:03:56 GMT

So I've started exercising. Like REALLY exercising, not just a brisk walk every week or somesuch.

It's haaard D: But I intend to keep at it. I listen to the entire "Phobia" album by Breaking Benjamin while I'm exercising, so that's a good 45 minutes a day. I've become acutely aware of how out-of-shape I am, but that's just inspiring me to get stronger. I'll keep taking walks, I'll work out every day, and I'll attempt to maybe-possibly-probably-not eat a tiny little bit better. The main areas I'm attempting to "target" are my upper arms, my abdominal muscles, and my legs. So... full body workout, woohoo!

I really wish I hadn't told Mom about this though. She immediately countered with "Oh that's so cool, and I'm doing my yoga stuff and I'm getting fit doing that teehee!" Uh... yeah, because stretching and "getting in tune with your chakras inner peace blah blah New Age bullshit" can TOTALLY compare to doing crunches and push-ups until you're completely out of breath and your muscles burn. *eyeroll* Thanks for trivializing this whole thing for me.

Eh. Whatever. I told her to not talk to me about it, and I've got the motivation to keep it up nonetheless. As to what that motivation is... well, that's a secret~ :D