Today, I had an insight about a way to circumvent my fear of failing. It started as I was reading the book,
On Becoming A Leader by
Warren Bennis. In chapter three titled, "Knowing Yourself", Bennis was
relaying the perspective of Marty Kaplan on a learning attitude.
What
occurred to me is that instead of seeing a situation as an opportunity
to fail or succeed, I need to see it as an opportunity to learn and
grow.
This is especially important, when I feel afraid to act,
because I might fail to get it right or fail to meet others
expectations. My fear usually produces high anxiety because my worth is
threatened by the possibility of failing. But what if the outcome is
not about if I succeed but if I learn. What if each decision or action
were not a test of my ability to be right but an opportunity to get
hands on experience in learning something new or improving my skills .
What
if challenging situations no longer held the power to determine if I am
a success or a failure but only the power to teach me. I feel much
better being challenged in my ability to learn than my ability to
succeed. If I don't get it right, I am not a failure, I just know what
doesn't work, and the next time I will try something different.
In
my mind this takes the power away from life experience to determine my
worth and instead gives me the power to make life experience my teacher.
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