TUESDAY, DECEMBER 2, 2003: I GET MY PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN! YAY!! OH MAN CAN'T WAIT!

a christmas story; gosh its that time of year again! i am sooo feeling nostalgic and... deprived as a californian. hahahaha. man... i love the season though... the idea of the season is... amazing. its just a time to give, and be together and... the world is changed for a few weeks... the air is different, the sky is different, etc. i love it! man! gosh i love winter... i love christmas, i love the holidays, i love the feelings. man!!!!! [if you knew me im squeaking in excitement] oh look! its story time

houston, texas; the two story house was still, she laid in her bed and waited for the sun to rise, the loft bedroom overlooked the dimmly lit living room. she tip toed and looked over the balcony. her mom and aunt were warppign lage boxes... obviously santa never existed, the evidence was in front of her. she stood anxiously, hoping to figure out wat was in teh boxes. her mother and aunt spoke about christmas, dinner, and family. they placed ribbons and bows on large, wrapped boxes and placed them under teh tree. the pile flooded onto the fireplace. still, she stood, watching the presents emerge from shopping bags. ---- the next morning, her brother woke first, the thumping of footseps on hollow stairs woke her, she rushed down staris and sat next to her brother... they read all teh tags and separated what was theirs. they both ran upstairs into mom and dad's room... then to their aunts' room. the chill of the morning didnt bother them... they were jsut excited that it was christmas morning... for the next hour, they unwarpped presents and gushed at the gifts they had been loning for.

north providence, rhode island; the tree lights shone through the bay window. the snow fell lightly outside. the crisp heat filled the house. the night was silent. nothing moved outside except for the falling snow. no cars outside, no people, no animals, just snow and stillness. she sat and watched the lights reflect off the window. her brother sat and watched tv and her parents in the kitchen. christmas eve had never been so tranquil adn quiet. her father got off teh phone and asked if we wanted ot spend christmas at a friend's house; they lived in woonsocket, twenty minutes away. happily, out of boredom and restlessness, she got up and ran to her room, her brother followed. they bunddled up and put on layers of clothes and jackets, packed "nice" clothes for pictures and dinner, and whatever other occassion could arise. they piled the presents in the car and drove to woonsocket. the snow was thicker as they drove on the freeway. when they got to woonsocket, the presents were unloaded, and everyone greeted each other. ---later that night, her friend's father dressed up as santa. they took pictures and laughed hysterically. at midnight, they began to unwrap presents and take more pictures... the first time she had spent christmas with peopel who were family.

west covina, california; there was no tree. there were no decorations. there was just... a new house. they moved in, they painted, htey cleaned, they unpacked... big friggen whoop! hahahaha. [jk] ok ok ok waiiiittt:-----

another west covina, california; to show how unpassionate i am about my winters in california... big deal... i wrap everythign, i know everything, i put everythign under the tree, i wake up.... CANT OPEN ANYTHING, waiting for family to show up... everyone is late, we dont open presents... in the morning, we spend the morning cleaning for everyone else to show up, we... cook. then peopelshow up at around 12, still cant opn presents... we eat.... and eat and eat.. then when we do open presents... its not personal... and its not intimate and its not... heartfelt... its just there the act of getting what you want... its not appreciated as much as it use to... i'd rather... not have presents if thats the case.

thinking; what is christmas? everyone has been so fed up and focussed on gifts... gosh... if you are reading this and you are my loving and dear friend... don't get me anything! to me, christmas isnt about gifts... seriously. i want... a real christmas and i want... to spend time with you rahter than open a present from you! hahhahahahaaha. ok crystal!? hahaha cristine!? lol. gosh... ihavent had a real christmas... ive had warm and fun ones [like the memories i extracted above... but... gosh christmas has lost its spunk. i dont feel like its such a big deal... but i love it! gosh! hahaha.

desiderata; gosh i just want to walk in the winter cold... and have it snow!!! but... that isnt going to happen here in california hahahaha. geez. but.. hey. a girl can dream... and thats wat winter is. hahah its kind of like my excuse to dream. lol. gosh... when i grow up im gona have a winter home in new england. hahahhaa. i can't take this. lol. mannnn. chrsitmas is here!!!!!! mannn i love this season. lol. even if its... reminiscent, its such a beautiful season. gosh hahahaa. can it be?? i may liek winte rmore than summer??? ::gasp:: hahaha. summe ris more fun for the body... but my soul is more... free when winter is in the aiiirrr. hahhaah. and i love christmas songs! gosh summer has no songs. hahahahaha. gosh! im going to get dad to clean the fire place and go get me wood aahahhahah.

instant impulse; marriage! hahahahaa. cristine were such saps! hahahha. gosh ive been watchign three hours of seventh heavan on abcfamily. hahahaha. its all about marriage. its so cute! lol. goshhhh im such a sap now... thanks a lot cristine hahahah jk. hhahaa you know that whole "girls dream of their weddings when they're 12" ? hahahaa. that is so true! lol. man ive been plannign my weddings since forever! hell.. my barbies have lived out my wedding since forever. hahahaha. man... i cant wait till "that day" that should be interesting. hahaha. now i have flashbacks of my aunts wedding. that day was.. incredible. hahaha. man and... then hahha oh man. when she was dating my uncle... gosh i love their stories. hahahah. they knew each other in high school!!! crazy heh? and they went to colelge together. but never talked... and then... he plays basketball every sunday and he asked his high school friend "hey do you remember hien?" and his friend was liek YEAH! SHES MY WIFE'S BEST FRIEND. and my uncle got her number and he never called her for months! hahhaa and when he did they went ont ehri first date... on his birthday. hahaa. then... yadda yadda yadda... they date more and more, but when we met him... he said "we're just friends" hahahha. suuuuree. but yeah... now that they're married.. i love the relationship they have. it seems so... normal!!! hahah the problem with all these middle school and high school things is that they think being in a relationship is all about being the other person's girlfriend or boyfriend, and all they care about is how long they're together and watever... and... my aunt and uncle's relationship is jsut... about.. enjoying eachother's company and "growing together??" and gosh!! when we slept over at their house, oh man it was sooo fun/cute. hahahaha. we [me, steph and andrea] were getting clued in on their "story" and we found out about some love letters. hahahaa. and like my aunt... rejected him first. hahaha. because she didnt want a realtionship.. and she had her work adn future to think about because she had just switched fomr teh IRS to the dept. of labor and she was getting thigns "done" with the house and watever. and like... even if she enjoyed talking to kenneth adn stuff she didnt want to be in a relationship. BUT! he tried anyway! hahahaa. he wrote her a letter, adn she rejected him... again. ahhahahah. THEN! she went to colorodo for training and he gave her anotehr letter and a poem!! hahaa and THATS the letter that won her over, and of course, when we wanted to READ it! it was misplaced! hahaha. so we spent two hours lookgin through boxes for it. hahahah. but what we did find was... an annerversery card. and gosh... i didnt know my aunt would EVER express feelings like that because she deosnt seem like the type of person to spill it out like that. but gosh i got chills. ahhahah. its so cute. hahaha. well after two hours, we gave up and we turned on teh satalite and watched movies. hahaha. gosh that was a fun night. hahaha. gosh!!! im such a sap ok seventh heavan time. haha [ i had to make 2 separate blogs because they are two different subjects buttt quite interesting heh?]