So I was working at Banana Republic today (have I mentioned that I left AIX? Maybe this has been like the millionth time now, lol) when my dear Andrew came to visit me before he left to San Fran again. This was our last meeting before he leaves tomorrow morning. Well I was on my 30 minute break and eating my Chick-Fil-A, which I hear doesn't exist in California (or was it just in SF that it doesnt' exist?), and Andrew said,

"The reason your choice of boy failed again is because your philosophy on dating is different than the philiosophy of your target dating group. You just have to be patient and something good will come around."

I asked him if what he meant and he reasoned that my target age group (20- late 20s), doesn't believe in the same things that I believe in. Plus, my choice of boy was out of that age range so that basically was a big factor. But I asked,

"Why don't I just change my way of thinking so that I'm streamlined into my dating group? Wouldn't that be better than being single for another 2 years?"


To which Andrew replied,

"Because that's not the kind of person you want to be. You want to be someone who is level headed, not someone who goes to the club every weekend and focuses on unimportant events instead of furthering their future." 

So the only thing I can do from here on in is become a better me. But seriously, I'm starting to forget how it is to be in a relationship. One of the things I've learned from this past boy was that I really don't know how to create conversations anymore. Interesting events and topics used to flow seemlessly, and now I really have to concentrate on what to say next. I think it's just a part of the aging process. Also, I've become more and more insensitive -- or maybe I've jsut dealt with this feeling of disappointment over and over again -- because I've gotten over the whole situation in a relatively quick fashion. I mean, it's not that I don't think about it, but I've tried to reconcile and be a good person even though I was blown off.

So the new goals are:
1. Be patient
2. Become a better Dave (maybe physically and academically? Or maybe physically and socially? )

Wish me luck =]

So this is why I shouldn't be drinking coffee so late at night for bullshit study sessions. My mind's racing, but it's actually been more stimulated now than all weekend.

This past weekend, I've holed myself up inside the house to finish off the Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicles season 1. Mommy ended up buying all of season 1 for a ridiculous amount, but what can you do if you really like something? I know you can't just sit around and wait until there's a good deal. Puh-leeze!

It also seems like many people have seen me before. I've been getting questions from random people like, "Hey! Do you go to Roxy?" or my optometrist would ask me, "You know, I remember you from your visits here cause I enjoy the conversations we have -- but I've seen you outside here before. But where?" 
To which those questions, I can only reply "No, I don't know where you've seen me. Maybe I just have one of those faces"
Maybe I do have one of those faces. Or maybe I'm just really social? Either way, people still ask me.

Lately, for the past couple or so weeks, I've been bumping into more and more people that I haven't seen in a good while. Maybe it's cause the semesters ending, but it really seems to me that the world is starting to shrink back into what it was before I hit my 20s. Not that I'm even 21 as of yet, but if you think about -- the world didn't seem so stretched out when your circle of acquaintances all revolved around you at a daily schedule.


Speaking of getting older -- maybe I've been drinking too much on the weekends -- but my essay writing skills have severely diminished. Alot of times, I can't seem to pull out the right words to make the paragraph flow as smoothly as I could before. Or maybe it's because I don't read books anymore and that my attention span has also dwindled to only things that are as shallow as the top 20 songs on VH1. School is starting to feel like it's never gonna end, especially since I can't seem to get into a graduate program anywhere near Houston. I'm starting to venture off into applying near Dallas and Galveston. I'm even contemplating on applying in Nebraska or California. Even though I keep getting hit with rejection letters, ever since summer of last year, I'll take a day out and just sulk -- but then I'll try and jump back on my feet so I can keep chasing that goddamn career.

Also, the anticipation and stress from waiting on those rejection / interview / interview-rejection letters is throwing my academics off balance. I don't even know where I stand in my Stats class anymore. I'm hoping for a C. I can't believe that. I'm never hoping for a C. But times are a-changing. Maybe that's why I've been smoking a bit more every weekend. Even though I don't finish off an entire pack within one drinking session anymore, the inhalation of nicotine is increasing bit by bit. But it's alright, just as long as I keep forgetting to bring my lighter or as long as the wind keeps blowing out my matches -- then I'll be alright. I just don't wanna get to the point where the smoke is literally coming off my skin and is a part of my natural scent. Now that would be disgusting.

It feels good to not be working anymore. I'm totally just sleeping in all day and walking around in my pajamasa in the afternoon now. I've applied to other places, but most stores aren't exactly hiring at this time of the year. But that's totally alright with me. It was just such an uplifting experience to say, "FUCK YOU, Armani-Exchange!"

Alrighty, I'll see you guys around.

I'm currently watching the Live Finale of America's Best Dance Crew. I'm rooting for Jabba. They're hot =]  Status Quo isn't doing anything for me. All they do is flip around.

Well, I learned in the past couple of days that you should never buy a blazer that isn't in numbered sizes (i.e. 38 short or 42 regular). The small is too small and the medium is too big. Forget that.

My new Blackberry has scratches on it already.

I've been going back to the gym lately, but my body feels really off. I've also stopped eating red meat, it's been about a month and half now.

I don't feel very coordinated anymore. Even my typing has been off. Either I'm growing and my cerebellum is slightly off because of the growth, or I have a brain tumor.

I'm very content with growing up as an old man with 60 cats. Give or take another 20 or so. I just haven't found the right guy, and my recent encounters have sort of put me off to finding anyone and committing. Commitment scares me, and I'd rather just stay home and play pokemon. Btw, if you wanna trade my friend code is: 3566-0484-1007. Just leave me a comment.

I've been waiting for a letter from either the University of Texas Health Science Center or the University of Texas Medical Branch. I think they hand out acceptance letters in April.

I got a speeding ticket during Spring Break while driving my friend's car home from San Antonio. But I called them 2 weeks later, and it turns out that my ticket was dismissed.

I put in my 2 weeks notice at Armani Exchange. But then I ended up taking it back. I'll properly quit when I get another job. I've applied at Club Monaco, but I dont think they're hiring just yet.

I'll leave you with a picture from Spring Break:



Nathan, Jahne, and Dave jumping around in San Antonio. *I'm in the yellow  =]