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MusicalJesus
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Name: Cory
Birthday: 7/25/1981
Gender: Male
Interests: Music, Movies, and being alone.
Expertise: I have a couple bits of expertise but mostly i suck at everything, including life. I know a lot about music tho. I think anyways....
Occupation: Customer service/support
Industry: Engineering
Message: message me
Member Since:
3/15/2003
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SubscriptionsSites I Read
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| - Not Dark YetHA, no one reads this i know it but i came upon it after my dentist
appt because i had nothing else to do but ice my gums. They
really enjoy ripping my mouth apart. Anyways, all is well.
Hope everything is alright with you.....by you i mean me....since im
the only one that will read this.
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| Today
was another one of those days. Just one of those days where being alone
was okay and also not okay. I ran 4 miles (1 with my dog, she is so out
of shape by the end of it she was stumbling) and i walked a couple
more. Just listened to my headphones and sat down at the school for a
little bit. Changed my phone message so im not singing on it anymore.
Time to give that dream up. Just walked or ran around listening to some
music and thinking about stuff. Nothing in particular really, just
thinking. Thinking how this time last year was the start of this phase
of my life. How 2 years ago i had never been happier and how i have
basically done nothing but bad for myself since then. Yeah well, i
guess everything turns around for the best but when? Can i wait? Will i
wait? Will i give up like i so often do? I dont know. I dont really
know anything really. I just basically living day to day. Trying to
keep myself busy so i dont think about stuff. I'm really a nice guy and
it is time to try and get back to that. Time to get back to treating
people how i did when i was happy. I know where happiness lies and i
know what it feels like, but i totally wish it wasnt completely out of
my grasp right now. I'll get there....... | | |
| Ive come to the conclusion that i only get lonely when i listen to the counting crows. I mean seriously. I was fine all day. I even talked to my ex girlfried for a bit and was fine. The convo was fine. I was fine with everything all day and then im sitting alone at work and number 10 comes on the storytellers album by counting crows. The horns in it just send me into a cataclysmic downfall. Maybe it brings me down but maybe i need to be better than fine. Maybe thats the problem. I havent exactly been searching out happiness. Ive just been trying to get by. Maybe its becuz i seriously dont know what to do. Maybe its because im a mess. maybe its because this is whats meant for me. This is my punishment for letting the best thing i had going go. Whatever it is, i know one thing, i dont like it. Im gonng go to KU this weekend and see friends graduate, prolly see my ex for the last time, and prolly pop in counting crows on the way home on saturday. Will i cry? Probably, becuz im a pussy? No, becuz i care. | | |
| Im going to kill myself after the last Star Wars movie is
released. I have approximately one more month to live. Say
your goodbyes.
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| I am gonna date a stripper and live happily ever after with someone who
not only will I adore but also my friends will enjoy seeing naked.
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